Blind Item

Without need for introduction here's a tip (well, more of a question, really) that came from a Los Angeles based shop.

"Dear AgencySpy, I currently work at _______. Is my career ruined? I am trying to leave but can't. Help. — Lost in L.A."

We're glad you asked, Lila. The answer, of course, is probably. Though I have omitted the name of your agency, it is clear at this point that the entire industry is going down the tubes and all of us with it.

My advice: be like the people in Lemonade Movie and focus on your passions — recall whatever it is you truly love to do and make that your career. Hopefully in time, you will grow to absorb yourself in this favorite thing eventually learning to hate it as much as you hate your current predicament. Only when you have grown to hate all the things that have thus for gotten you through your life will you be prepared for your true future — starting the L.A. branch of Fight Club. You are Tyler Durden, dude. Or lady.

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More: "Blind Item! Which Agency CCO..."

A tipster tells us that at a certain major agency's new digs, nocturnal naughtiness seemingly abounds which results in "employees [finding] used condom[s] in their...office's elevator all the time since the hookers get in the building at night. For real." Extra hospitable building security aside, can we be sure this doesn't pertain to Wall Street?

More: "Blind Item: Which Agency's Got Some 'Splainin to Do?"

You know what's fun? Puzzles! Today's is particularly vague, since there's no chance in hell that the agency will confirm the news. Anyway, the tip reads as follows:

"The ________ _______ at _______ and _______ was escorted from the premises by 2 of New York's finest last week."

We'll hopefully have more for you on this one later this week — as police reports have a handy way of telling us exactly what happened and maybe even why. Alas, these things take time.

More: Blind Items

It's natural, when times are tough, to get pissed at your company for doing stupid things. Let's say your pay was cut or raises have stopped but somehow your boss still manages to get away for that round of golf with the client. Or you work for a holding company agency that's had tons of layoffs and now your global ceo is running around buying all sorts of weird companies you've never heard of. That's annoying. What's worse? When your agency sends someone to play ping pong.

The Egos sound like a good time. For those of you who aren't familiar, the Egos are "the first and only unbiased and insidputable award show for the communications industry". It's sponsored by Bing and if you're in NYC tonight you can catch the suspense, if you have a ticket.

The spy who wrote to us had some interesting comments about his/her agency's decision, shared here for your reading pleasure:

"After years of steady declines in budgets and revenues that have resulted in multiple layoffs and significant payroll cuts, struggling ad agency __________ has hit upon a bold idea to improve a staggering loss of employee morale: an all-expenses paid trip to New York for a __________ to compete in a bogus music house ping pong tournament. 'I've helped grow my client's business 200%, but I haven't had a raise in almost four years,' said one staffer. "But this young [person's] trip to New York, that makes all of my unappreciated efforts worthwhile." Other employees agree. "Sometimes, the way our ___ blackmails us into driving _______ and contributing thousands of dollars to the _________ to make [him/her] look good, sometimes that pisses me off. But now that I see we've got a nobody being flown to this ping pong tourney, well, I have never been more proud to put in long hours and weekends away from my family for _________." Rumor has it other morale building ideas include putting carpet in the parking spaces of upper management, giving bottles of Cristal champagne to summer interns, and free hair plugs for the guys on the 10th floor who clearly need them. 'Last year, we didn't get Christmas bonuses,' said one administrative assistant. 'And if we don't get one this year, it's okay, because I'll tell my children their present was a co-worker playing in a ping pong tournament. What kid wouldn't love that?'"

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More: Read all Blind Items here

Which agency did a major holding company have in mind (to kill) when it recently purchased a competing shop? Furthermore, which agency leader came to the London office of the agency his/her company purchased to make this fact known during a pep talk? Hint: this representative also said the shop was bought for its culture. Oh wait, that's not helpful at all.

More: "Blind Item: Withholding Non-Discretionary Bonuses"

There are pitches and then there are business maneuvers made in the name of public relations. In this case, a major agency might be dumped, according to a source, to inject the news cycle with some "other news."

The best part of this rumor: we hear that the offending client might have written something to this affect in the brief they gave to the consultancy in charge of finding new ad-talent. We hear the full quote goes something like this (if it indeed exists): "[Client] wants change for change's sake, to take attention off of us and make it look like we are doing something proactive."

That's one way to get it done. But did it really happen?

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More: "Blind Item: Withholding Non-Discretionary Bonuses"

A tipster tells us that a "friend" at a division of a certain global agency is revealing that an SVP/creative there is "openly tormenting underlings with threats" of layoffs "at anytime" and blaming the economy. Additionally, this certain creative that "once went behind a manager's back to lay someone off while they were out of town" is part of an agency that's an "HR nightmare" filled with "megalomaniacal heads."

More: "Blind Item: Which Agency Has Had More Drama than a Scorsese Film?"

A tipster tells that an agency which recently lost a good chunk of its creative force is going through a breakdown of "classic" proportions replete with "death threats, restraining orders, millions of dollars wasted on frivolous bullshit" and "leadership going off the deep end."

While we can't confirm the maelstrom described, it already has all the makings of Michael Clayton 2.

More: "Blind Item: Which Agency's Employee Told the Lead Creatives to "F*ck Off" Then Yelled at Coworkers From On High?"

Today's blind item is one of anger, shouty ranting and an alleged conversation where an agency employee told the top creatives to "f*ck off". It only gets better from there.

After making said statement, this employee apparently proceeded to yell at coworkers through their artsy office windows (all at once!). Now that's communication! Unfortunately, word on the street is that the matter did not end well; employee was in tears we're told before a colleague came to the rescue.

To this alleged free-speaker we say, kudos for letting the words fly (if they indeed flew). Also, a pat on the back goes to the friend who helped clean the mess up and whoever designed the shop to make it so easy to address so many at one time. Unintended consequences!

What could have caused such a row? Probably a client, of course.

Note: As far as we know, the employee did not quit. But a reference to Jerry Maguire had to be made.

More: "Blind Item: Which Agency is Allegedly Making Room?"

Over the last few months we've received a few tips that so far have gone unconfirmed by agency representatives. Yesterday's news of the VW business is up for grabs must have the auto-client-free agencies salivating. The tips we're about to share, if true, would mean some whale accounts are about to shift. Here's what we heard today.

[A holding company is] in negotiations to consolidate US [luxury automotive] business at [sister agency] from [current agency]. Freeing [current agency] to also represent [holding company] (among others) in pitch for VW business in US. Goal is to insure both brands are held entirely by [holding company] globally. DDB is agency for VW everywhere but in US.

This was the first hint we got on the subject.

[The holding company] plans to fold [current agency] when they lose [semi-large restaurant client]. [Luxury auto] US business to shift to [sister agency].