AllTwitter’s Wednesday series Twitticisms is back, featuring the jocular jests and witty wisecracks of Twitter’s funniest.
Cue the laugh track:
We SAY "YOLO," but fruit flies LIVE "YOLO."
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) August 28, 2013
I was given the "not here" look from my Therapist when I saw him at jury duty today. I had to play it off like I was getting some water.
— Jesse Tyler Ferguson (@jessetyler) August 28, 2013
If I ever call anyone "epigrammatic" instead of "witty," take my thesaurus away.
— Man Repeller (@ManRepeller) August 28, 2013
Swallowed a hard candy earlier and even tho I know it's "fine," I've felt like I'm in need of serious medical attention since it happened.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) August 28, 2013
Shout out to all bold enough to ride the greyhound bus. When's the last time for you?
— George Wallace (@MrGeorgeWallace) August 28, 2013
Hey iMessage, sometimes it's "were."
— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) August 28, 2013
"Twerking" and "selfie" added to the Oxford English Dictionary. Barbed wire and lasers added to my garden wall.
— Ricky Gervais (@rickygervais) August 28, 2013
Share your favorites in the comments!
(Laughing image from Shutterstock)