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Topic: Writer jokes....
| Author | Message |
| mad fingers | Posted – 1/30/2008 10:29:09 PM | show profile Got this from a friend today. Made me laugh. (More, anyone?) A writer died, and due to a bureaucratic snafu in the hereafter, she was to be allowed to choose her own fate: heaven or hell for all eternity. Being very shrewd for a dead person, she asked St. Peter for a tour of both. The first stop was purgatory, where she saw rows and rows of writers sitting chained to desks, in a room as hot as a thousand suns. Fire licked the writers' fingers as they tried to work; demons whipped their backs with chains. "Wow, this is awful," said the writer, appalled. "Let's see some heaven." In a moment, they were whisked to heaven, and the writer saw rows and rows of writers chained to desks, in a room as hot as a thousand suns. Fire licked the writers' fingers as they tried to work; demons whipped their backs with chains. It looked and smelled even worse than purgatory. "What gives, Pete?" the writer asked. "This is worse than hell!" "Yes," St. Peter replied, "but here your work gets published." |
| nellie bly | Posted – 1/30/2008 11:49:04 PM | show profile I wish the nuns in Catholic school told me this joke. Perhaps I would've gone into another line of work... there's a James Joyce joke: A friend stops by into James Joyce's garret and finds him sitting at his desk looking very agitated. What's wrong, James, why are you upset? says the friend. Joyce replies, I wrote only seven words today! Seven words! But that's splendid, says the friend. Joyce looks even more agitated, no it's not, because I don't know what order to put them in! |
| seeattleme | Posted – 1/31/2008 1:21:11 AM | show profile an old classic a writer and editor are lost in the desert. the writer wanders off in one direction and the editor in the other, looking for water to drink. The writer finds an oasis with a pool of clean, cool water and calls out to the editor. The editor, joining him, whips out his dick and starts pissing in the pool. "What the hell are you doing," the writer cries. The editor explains, "I'm making it better." |
| writesonwater | Posted – 1/31/2008 9:19:53 AM | show profile Thank you, THANK you -- all three delightful quips. I've been wracking my brain to think of a punchline to go with this: Why did the freelancer cross the road? Anyone? |
| nellie bly | Posted – 1/31/2008 10:22:09 AM | show profile Why did the freelancer cross the road? to find out if they were paying more than 10 cents per word on the other side |
| mad fingers | Posted – 1/31/2008 10:24:15 AM | show profile She was following the chicken for a story? |
| writesonwater | Posted – 1/31/2008 10:37:23 AM | show profile Teehee! I'm liking this stream of thought. I'll add another one to the mix: Knock Knock! Who's there? Writer! Writer who? (fill in the blanks) |
| Mag Girl | Posted – 1/31/2008 10:40:03 AM | show profile cross the road... ....to chase down her payment on the other side. |
| mad fingers | Posted – 1/31/2008 10:42:29 AM | show profile equal time She saw a deadline headed toward her and she wanted to dodge it. |
| wineaux | Posted – 1/31/2008 11:00:21 AM | show profile I was thinking along the same lines, Mag. To get paid. And wait another 6, 8, 10 or possibly 20 or more weeks for the check to show up. But, I guess that isn't clever or funny. Where are the witty ones with a quip? Foto? Donna? Even Bleak might suffice with something dripping in doom. |
| rhino writer | Posted – 1/31/2008 11:18:39 AM | show profile She was following her muse. |
| seeattleme | Posted – 1/31/2008 2:15:25 PM | show profile Why did the writer cross the road? For the job in advertising. |
| Righter | Posted – 1/31/2008 5:48:35 PM | show profile To procrastinate. |
