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Topic: leaving your first job
| Author | Message |
| sissyguadalupe | Posted – 4/10/2008 8:18:25 PM | show profile | email poster i've got two questions related to this: i'm getting ready to leave my first job (which i, with an incredible stroke of luck, landed before i even graduated from j-school.) it's with a newspaper i love and i have an editor i respect greatly. in fact, she's the only reason i'm still here -- and quitting is going to be kind of like telling my mom i don't love her anymore. she's extremely talented and i wouldn't be half the writer/reporter i am today without her. so turning in the resignation letter is going to be hard. should i e-mail her and ask for an outside of work meeting. i want her to tell her first out of respect, but i do work for a company -- i'll have to let corporate know pretty quick here. does anyone have any advice for how to do this gracefully? i plan on fulfilling the obligations i have to stories that are in the works and i'm not leaving because i hate the place -- i just want to see what else i can do. on that note, does anyone have any advice for how to approach the hiring editor in charge of the job i really want? i sent my resume and cover letter last week. i want to let her know that i am genuinely interested in the position (not just sending out cover letters to every open job i see), but i also don't want to be pushy or annoying. is a simple, direct e-mail expressing my continued interest appropriate? i have to say, even though i have years of journalism experience, i'm a bit green when it comes to applying for jobs since i got my current one so easily. i know my experience speaks for itself, but i also know getting an editor's attention and landing an interview is tricky. any advice is welcome and appreciated! thank you! |
| joyeuxnoelle | Posted – 4/10/2008 8:59:25 PM | show profile Don't think of it as telling your mom you don't love her any more; think of it as telling your mom that you're ready to move out on your own. It'll be hard but she'll understand. I've never been close to an editor that way, but I would think that you would want to talk to her privately off site before announcing it to everyone. I think as long as all of these things happen in the same day, you'll be fine. Good Luck. Keep us posted. |
| writerandeditor | Posted – 4/10/2008 9:05:27 PM | show profile I've been that close with an editor, and I think I know how you feel. I would tell her outside of the office -- can you take her to lunch? And then be prepared to tell corporate either that day or the next. You never know -- she may have some advice for you. Oh, and I agree with the poster who said it's not like telling your mom you don't love her. Clearly she's been in the business for a while. She may miss you, but she'll understand. No one stays at their first job forever. |
| seeattleme | Posted – 4/10/2008 9:22:59 PM | show profile she'll respect you for moving on. She did it. She expects you will do it. The sooner you do it, and the most graciously the better. By graciously: No email. No email! Bad. Do it face to face. With you immediateboss first, if that is your editor fine. But then the editor of whom you speak. Tell her how hard a move it is to make. Don't be embarassed about tearing up. Tell her it is an opporunity you can't refuse, though you searched your psyche for every reason to do so. Add you hope you will be working together again in the very soon future. But you must do it face to face. I would do it on a Thursday or Friday afternoon. |
| seeattleme | Posted – 4/10/2008 9:24:18 PM | show profile I would ask her assistant about requesting a face to face, if she has one. other than that, email her and ask for a face to face to discuss a matter. Keep it simple. |
| sissyguadalupe | Posted – 4/10/2008 9:27:52 PM | show profile thanks for the advice guys! i appreciate it. she's my immediate boss and a good friend as well. i think you're right about not emailing. i'll see if i can get her for coffee on a friday. that the awkward feelings can wear off over the weekend. |
| UGoGirl | Posted – 4/10/2008 10:35:44 PM | show profile OK, here's my advice, only offered because you said you were open to it... and goes beyond the strategy of how to tell your boss. But first, on your boss, yes face to face is best (either at work or outside of work). So.... are you really sure you want to leave this OK sounding job before you have another secured? We are in a recession now... maybe it was easy to get your first job but don't necessarily count on an easy time of it getting your next. Do you have financial support in the meantime? What if it takes 18 months to land your next job? Willing to do menial temp jobs? It always looks better to employers if you are currently employed. I don't think you gain anything with a prospective employer by quitting your current job... looks a little desperate. |
| pzach | Posted – 4/11/2008 1:51:55 AM | show profile AbsoLUTELY you have to do it in person. I can't imagine her not understanding, but you absolutely have to talk to her in person. Don't burn bridges. ------ ------ Great new music every day! www.returnticketmusic.com |
| Decorama | Posted – 4/11/2008 7:54:18 AM | show profile I agree with UGoGirl. Unless you have another job offer or some very valid reason for "quitting", such as you're getting married and your fiance lives in another state, I wouldn't leave this job. The job market is TOUGH, and that's an understatement. And quite honestly, if I understand you correctly, this is your first job after college. You don't have "years" of experience. |
| foodlit | Posted – 4/11/2008 7:56:30 AM | show profile I would hold off on saying anything until you accept a new position. You have much more leverage for negotiating and will be viewed as a more attractive candidate if you are employed. Once you quit, you will be viewed less favorably. Something else to consider, are you sure that the growth you are seeking is not available at your current company? You could have a conversation with your manager, theoretically, without saying you are going to look, but simply asking what kind of growth she envisions for you at the company. Companies will generally try to retain good people, and remember they can't fix a problem if they don't know it exists. There may be opportunities and growth that you aren't aware of. However, if you have already come to the conclusion that the growth doesn't exist and you are definitely going to move on I'd still advise you to wait until you have accepted an offer before giving notice. Then, ask for a meeting with your boss and simply say, "I hope you will be happy for me, I've accepted a new position that offers a challenge that I'm really excited about. I've enjoyed my time working for you and will do everything I can to help with the transition." When you put it out that way, it's positive and about a great opportunity, not a negative on them. That tends to work very well I've found! Good luck (and as an fyi, I'm a recruiter, in hr, so this is just based on what I've seen over many years.) Pam |
| joyeuxnoelle | Posted – 4/11/2008 10:24:30 AM | show profile oops I read over the part that says you aren't leaving to start another job. Um, yeah I definitely don't think you should quit a job without having a solid offer from another company - especially if you get along with your boss and you're not miserable there. Maybe you should tell us why you want to leave now. |
| sissyguadalupe | Posted – 4/11/2008 3:41:14 PM | show profile to answer jouyeuxnoelle, foodlit, etc.. i'm leaving for three reasons: the first is personal, the second is financial and the third, as i said before, is because i AM miserable, just lucky to have a good boss. hmm.. that probably sounds contradictory, but i can't really explain without giving details i shouldn't give. i am moving to a different state, which is a firm decision, now it's just a matter of how to make a graceful exit -- and i've gotten some great advice here. thank you. i have been offered another job (that i prefer to my current one, mostly because it pays more) but haven't officially accepted it yet because i'm still interested in the one i mentioned in my first post. obviously, i have a small window of time here which is why i'm curious whether i should follow up or just let it be. (also, i don't live in new york and don't work in magazine publishing, so jobs are a little, tiny bit easier to come by... though i've still had to hustle for almost a year to get the offer i currently have, so i know times are hard all over... ) i wish i could say more about why i want to leave my present job, but i can't without revealing too much about it. anyway, thank you everyone for the good advice. it is much appreciated! |
| WordyBird | Posted – 4/13/2008 6:07:07 PM | show profile For once in my life, I'm going to disagree with conventional wisdom, which says "don't leave until you have something else lined up." If you are miserable--crying every day, dreading coming to the office, feeling sick to your stomach when the alarm goes off Monday-Friday--and your health, relationships, and personal life are suffering because of the toll the job is taking on you, get the bleep out. Seriously. If you can type, you know a few programs, and you have a professional demeanor and look, you can always temp. I say this because NOTHING is worth sacrificing your health, well-being, and family life, and you're not going to be any good to that fabulous boss if you're a trainwreck. Besides, if you are indeed miserable, chances are that it will start affecting your performance. I've been where you are, painfully so, so I thought I'd throw my two cents in here, even though most will disagree. Even during a recession, there is money to be made. You may have to go outside your field, or temp, or work odd-jobs or part-time, but that will only be temporary--recessions don't last forever. Do what's best for you. |
| seeattleme | Posted – 4/14/2008 2:48:55 AM | show profile wordy bird is right. There is work to do, you can move to another city, you can sling hash. Nothing is worth your health and your sanity and your general sense of well-being. A job that interferes with these tings--especially family--needs to go. |
| foodlit | Posted – 4/14/2008 9:55:05 AM | show profile Well, I suspect more of us do agree with Wordy. We didn't know the part about being miserable earlier. :) Seriously, if you are ever miserable, truly dreading going into work each day, then if you can afford to do it, quit. Life is too short to put up with misery at work. My grandfather gave me that advice years ago, and it's true. I made the mistake of staying at a job far too long myself, the environment changed in the last few years I was there and I was miserable. I finally did leave and instantly it was like a huge weight was lifted. Interestingly, stress literally makes you sick. I was feeling ill for months, and having back pain that was terrible...and blaming it on a bad bed...two weeks after leaving that job, all of my aches and pains were completely gone. I was amazed! Staying in a job that makes you miserable is a toxic situation that can quite literally make you sick. |
| muserella | Posted – 4/14/2008 10:32:28 AM | show profile Sissyg... Since you have sent your resume and cover letter, an email seems reasonable, although a phone call can be a more effective way to check to make sure your resume was received. One tack you might take is asking if you might send some writing samples to support your application (you didn't mention sending them before). I think this would be considered constructive... When you are contemplating leaving a difficult job, it is important to remember that grinding yourself into dust is a lousy way to prepare to transition in the job market. It takes energy and a positive frame of mind to find and more importantly, to land your next position. Try to remain employed as long as you can, but invest more time in yourself and realizing your goals. |
| WordyBird | Posted – 4/14/2008 11:08:49 AM | show profile "When you are contemplating leaving a difficult job, it is important to remember that grinding yourself into dust is a lousy way to prepare to transition in the job market. It takes energy and a positive frame of mind to find and more importantly, to land your next position. Try to remain employed as long as you can, but invest more time in yourself and realizing your goals." Amen to that! If you've been at your job a long time, and you explain that you're moving out of state, your boss and company might be understanding if you need to take a day or two between now and the day you leave. That's how it was at my last position. I'd been there 10 years, had a boatload of leave, and was leaving on good terms, so when I had to take a day to deal with logistics and another day for all of my final MD appointments in the area, they were fine with that. Also, while it's noble of you to finish every story you're working on before you leave, if there are smaller projects and "other duties as required" that people besides your boss start bugging you to do, don't feel too bad if your last day comes and you didn't fulfill everyone else's last request. I don't know about you, but misery for me comes when people start coming at me with "one last thing before you go," whether it's whether I'm putting my coat on to leave at the end of the day or quitting a job entirely. When leaving entirely, particularly after a long run, it takes several days, and you have loose ends of your own to tie up, like exit interviews, COBRA paperwork, cleaning out your desk, etc. To smooth some of this over, you can always spend your last morning there preparing a status report of everything you're working on and where the files can be found on your computer, and you can debrief your boss. When I leave a job, I also like to leave a little "training" document for the next person about procedures, computer quirks, key phone numbers and contacts ("call Mary Doe in IT if your drive isn't set up"), etc. But in the end, you are leaving, and not to sound like a commercial for one of the on-line job sites, "they'll survive without you, start building" Great boss aside, if everyone else and everything else makes you miserable, well, tough noogs on them, anyway! Best of luck with the new job, too! (And thanks, Foodlit and Qunester, for validating. I just wish I didn't have to speak from experience!) |
| pencilandpaint | Posted – 4/14/2008 11:23:12 AM | show profile | email poster question for foodlit Hi, This is actually a question for foodlit: You said you're an HR recruiter in your earlier post, and I was hoping I could ask you a few questions by email? There should be a link to my email address above. Do you work for a food-related publication? Thanks! |
| pencilandpaint | Posted – 4/14/2008 11:23:27 AM | show profile | email poster question for foodlit Hi, This is actually a question for foodlit: You said you're an HR recruiter in your earlier post, and I was hoping I could ask you a few questions by email? There should be a link to my email address above. Do you work for a food-related publication? Thanks! |
