Beatles fans: first the good news.

Michael Jackson's long and unsettling ownership of a large portion of the Beatles' back catalog appears to be over. Those carousel horses don't feed themselves, I guess.

Variety also reports the somehow more disturbing news that George Martin has been digging through the vaults for enough unreleased tracks to comprise of a Vegas Cirque Du Soleil show.

"It involves the creation, by the remixing and remastering of the Beatles' recorded performances, of completely new music, which will be featured in the show," said Apple chief Neil Aspinall during the recent Apple Corps vs. Apple Computer lawsuit. "(That) should lead to the release of the show album."

There is something profoundly sad about the idea of a bunch of unnaturally limber French Canadians booping and bopping to John Lennon's guitar noodlings while never once doing anything remotely amusing. They are supposed to be funny, people — that's why they call them clowns!