There's faint praise and then there's really faint praise. And the Gray Lady spares no barb in its assessments of two new "Housewives" incarnations, one British, one reality. "Suburban Shootout," a British export, washes ashore 9pm (on Oxygen) tomorrow; but it's "The Real Housewives of Orange County" that takes a particularly hard hit.

Our favorite pull-quote?

"The show isn't entertaining, exactly - it has none of the wit or style of "Desperate Housewives." But like so much reality TV, it's both educational and grimly fascinating, and leaves you feeling much better about your own life - if for no other reason than that you would never be so stupid as to appear on a show like this."

Ow. Thanks...I think. Anyway, it's on at 10 pm tonight on Bravo, if you're feeling particularly masochistic.