Former WB (remember the WB?) PR guy Keith Marder used to be one of the highlights of the Television Critics Association annual press tour. The guy was meant to do standup. He was also meant to marry a nice Jewish girl (btw, if you know anyone . . . ) But since the WB and UPN merged, critics figured Marder's days of delivering standup were over.

Not so. Marder surprised the critics on Monday (yeah, we know today is Wednesday. We've been drinking again.) with a return to the stage.

Highlights: "Well, I told you UPN would never last. ... It feels like only yesterday that The WB was in business and 7th Heaven was canceled."

"You know what's exactly like The Sopranos? World Cup soccer. The Italians won. Everybody watched. And now they'll go away for four years."

Marder, who now works at CSTV, told us last week that he was going to surprise the crowd but made us swear not to tell anyone until after the fact. Well, this is definitely after the fact. At least we can keep a secret.