FishbowlDC

Quotes of the Day

Uh oh.

“If you receive an Edible Arrangement & 4 mylar Happy Birthday balloons in DC today, your bike messenger just got in a fight w my cabdriver.” — The Atlantic‘s Molly Ball.

More ragging on Washington

“There is too much wrong with Washington to say ‘So and so represents everything that’s wrong with Washington.’ But it’s Lanny Davis.” — Former Obama speechwriter and The Atlantic‘s Jon Lovett. Davis is former special counsel to President Clinton. He’s a lawyer and TV commentator.

Bumpy ride followed by brisket

“AF1 was wheels up in Denver at 5:09 p.m. local time (7:09 p.m. DC time). The first 15 minutes or so were unusually bumpy, throwing folks around before settling down in time for the beef brisket on Texas toast.” — NYT‘s Peter Baker in a late-night White House Pool Report.

Headline that should make you squirm: “Woman charged with putting menstrual blood in boss’s coffee.” If you must read the story see here. The lede is wonderfully appropriate: “This is not the best part of waking up.” In a strange twist, the story reports that in certain cultures this is a ritual that promotes sexual connection. Yikes.

TV reporter gets cheeks question

“Working in TV gets you questions. stranger asked if I had cheek implants. said no moved on. now wonder… which cheeks we talking about?” — ABC7′s always dramatic reporter Stephen Tschida.

Alec Baldwin wonders about Breitbart’s death

“I asked what killed Breitbart. And all your RW zombies say I ‘mock his death.’ I’m glad these people are a fringe few. Sad.” — Alec Baldwin. To one detractor he replied, “Will, you fool. No one is mocking anyone’s death. What killed Breitbart is the question.”

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

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Quotes of the Day

Breitbart.com’s War on BuzzFeed

“If BuzzFeed Politics would just come out against the right, it would be a much better site. Seriously.” — Breitbart.com‘s John Nolte.

HuffPost reporter with broken hand pissed

“I hate everyone. I’m typing with one hand!” — HuffPost‘s Elise Foley, who broke her arm while texting and walking at the same time. As we reported previously, she’ll be in a sling for six weeks.

Poor Mr. Kim: “Mr Kim, the DC liquor store owner featured in 9 News Now reports for selling booze to underage kids, was found guilty in court today.” — News Assignment Manager at WUSA9′s Bill Starks.

Slate‘s Jack Shafer: “Can’t somebody give Joe Biden a blog? I’d read it.”

Journo prays for strength amid loudmouth train rider

“Please, Lord, make her stop talking. I beg of you. Make. Her. Stop. #auralhostage #acela” — WaPo‘s Jonathan Capehart.

Whoa! You did what? “Engrossed in my phone, literally bumped into a person coming out of Barneys @georgetowndc. Look up, it’s Jennifer Hudson. M’scuse, J-Hud.” – Washingtonian‘s Kate Bennett.

Reporter offers unusual warning

“Gird your loins, ladies and gentlemen: @JoeBiden is armed with visual aid in latest campaign speech.” — Tribune‘s Mike Memoli.

Writer fights back

“People who #hate have NO CLUE what goes on in other people’s lives beyond what you think you see. NO CLUE. To my haters YOU ARE CLUELESS!” — NBC theGrio’s Sophia Nelson, who recently had her life threatened. “Folks I am not upset with #haters they are what they are. I am disgusted by people who think they have the right to curse you out publicly.”

Reporter covering Romney tossed out of hotel

“Two very large, very serious-looking security folks just booted me from back entrance of Hyatt in midtown, where Romney is about to arrive.” — NBC News campaign embed reporter Garrett Haake.

WTF?

“Oh WTH, FYI, in case you missed it, ICYMI means ‘in case you missed it.’ — author David Limbaugh, brother of conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh. Thanks, David, for letting us in on that national secret.

Quotes of the Day

“Do I exfoliate? I’ll punch you for asking me that.” — MSNBC’s “Morning Joe” co-host Willie Geist on becoming “mansome” in a morning documentary on male grooming. Geist said his Germanic roots prevent him from getting unwanted back hair or the dreaded unibrow.

Convo Between Two Journos

Today’s convo is between The Guardian’s Ana Marie Cox and writer Lisa De Pasquale, who lives in Alexandria, Va. and writes The Lotus Blog.

Ana Marie Cox: “Today is the day I bought a pair of white skinny jeans.”

Lisa De Pasquale: “Ana Marie Cox, Congrats. I adore white pants and don’t care if they make me look like I’m on my way to mahjong.”

“BREAKING: Obama appears to be growing a mustache.” — Yahoo! News‘s Chris Moody.

Comforting Thoughts

“My Thursday column topic: dealing w the TSA. Or how I took a pocket knife through 3 airports by accident, until I notified chagrined TSA.” — Dick Hughes, Editorial Page Editor for the Statesman Journal in Salem, Ore.

Current TV’s star, Eliot Spitzer, loses his Twitter virginity with this: “This is Eliot Spitzer – Viewpoint host- Frmr Ag and Gov — hope you will follow national and world events with me over election season ahead.” Sadly, as of 11:02 p.m. he had three tweets, has 120 followers and is follow no one. His handle is @EliotSpitzer.

Loesch morphs into Rachel Ray

“Nothing says ‘sorry’ like a good dog casserole. Just an FYI to Booker.” — Breitbart.com Editor Dana Loesch in reference to Newark Mayor Cory Booker.

President Obama’s Chicago-centric interview

“Media doesn’t get many opportunities to question President. Thankfully we got a question in on how much Obama loves Chicago.” — Heritage Foundation Communications Director Rory Cooper.

President Obama’s Chicago-centric interview

“Media doesn’t get many opportunities to question President. Thankfully we got a question in on how much Obama loves Chicago.” — Heritage Foundation Communications Director Rory Cooper.

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

 

Quotes of the Day

“That’s one crazy cat.” — MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough on Politico‘s Patrick Gavin, who appeared on the program this morning. He was referring to Gavin’s abundance of cats.

Unnecessary Tweet of the Day

“It’s toasty in the terminal & my flight is delayed. Good thing I brought my mobile coat rack.” — Fox News D.C. Correspondent Peter Doocy. We like you Doocy junior, probably more than Daddy Doocy, but a “mobile coat rack” was worthy of an Instagram picture?

Eclipse watching gets eclipsed by joker

“Oh and then we had to keep reminding adult people at the park not to stare directly at the eclipse because humanity is a rich tapestry.” — former White House Speechwriter and The Atlantic‘s Jon Lovett. Before that, however, he unleashed a series of folksy tweets, saying, “Eclipse a reminder that a lot of being a kid is figuring out what’s special and why.” He also wrote about  a “lovely” woman at the park who was showing kids the eclipse through an eclipse viewer. He prefaced that one by writing “serious tweet.”

Humblebrag: “I am the least wonky guest on today’s @upwithchris.” — WaPo‘s Ezra Klein.

In other bragging…“Gotta say my rental #Ford Taurus is a very impressive car. Looking for a 4 door sedan? Check one out.” — GOP Consultant, “MTP” Analyst and TIME columnist Mike Murphy.

Hey online psychos, this one’s for you

“Word to the Wise: When you get BLOCKED on twitter by one of us-it does NOT mean you have your psycho friends send your psycho tweets instead.” — NBC theGrio’s badass Sophia Nelson.

Most ridiculous Politico Playbook mention today goes to David Martin, father of Senior Political Writer Jonathan Martin. It’s his “BIRTHWEEK.” So can we now expect updates on DMart? We realize the birthday offerings were sparse this morning and this was Mike Allen‘s first day back from “fishing” but really?

Tonight: WaPo‘s Chris Cillizza hosts Politics & Pints, a nerdy political trivia night at the Capitol Lounge. “Be there or run the risk of being square,” Cillizza writes in an email. Sign up here.

Whoa what?! FBDC’s Eddie Scarry lost his cell phone this weekend at the Mighty Pint. He’s off to pick up the phone this morning at the Metro from the stranger who found it. “Rather than turn it in, some ass apparently took it home,” Eddie told me. “But it’s locked so they can’t use it.” Update: Stop the presses. Eddie didn’t realize New Carrolton was at the end of the line. He hopped off and turned around. He’s not making the voyage.

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

Quotes of the Day

Lest anyone forget about former CNNer Eric Kuhn, who fled Washington for Hollywood’s United Talent Agency last year, he’s having his 25th birthday party in Manhattan in early June. We’ve blocked out some of the details so intruders don’t ruin his party. Happy Birthday Kuhn!

Writer’s life threatened

“Both @MichaelEDyson & I have received threats on our person since last Friday. Americans we can do better than this. Truly. #EPluribusUnum” — NBC theGrio columnist Sophia Nelson, who isn’t permitted to talk to the media about this for the time being.

Stress as a weight-loss plan

“#2012WorkoutPlan – Romney just told reporters ‘high stress’ keeps him in shape on the road.” — FNC Correspondent Peter Doocy.

Funniest Hate Mail

“Dave Weigel keep drinking that kool-aid, you ignorant baboon.” — said by @iamstainaverse (who is now — ouch! — suspended).

Breitbart editor threatens to cut off birthers

“Honest to G-D, Birthers. I will BLOCK you if you don’t cease with the stupid. Say what u want but not with a @ in front of my name.” — Breitbart.com‘s John Nolte.

Question to Ponder: “Is there anything to explain today’s traffic jackassery in DC?” — Reuters‘ Sam Youngman.

Be VERY afraid

“Tomorrow, I will introduce the Weigel Plan to destroy my enemies. If you guys don’t like it, I’ll denounce the plan and deny it exists.” — Slate‘s Dave Weigel.

Journo is down on politics

“There are days when I look around at the political landscape and detest the fact that I’m standing knee-deep in a cesspool.” — NYT‘s Charles Blow.

What’s Driving the Day: “Just go ahead and click on that GOP butt plugs story now and get it over with.” — Reason Magazine’s Peter Suderman, who links to this story.

Eddie Scarry contributed to this report.

 

 

Quotes of the Day

TV reporter gets lost

“Driving yourself to live shot. Getting lost trying to find live shot. Finding live shot 1 minute before air. Priceless.” — ABC7′s Jummy Olabanji in an early morning tweet.

Yuck! Dental Hygienist Speaks Out

“I’ve seen a lot. Once, I flossed a pubic hair out of a guy’s mouth. Oh god, yes, I’m sure it was a pubic hair. I almost said something, but I decided it’d be better if I didn’t.” — the best/worst line of the BuzzFeed story with the headline, “D.C. Dental Hygienist: Senators And Supreme Court Justices Need The Most Gum Work.” Read the story here.

Quote taken out of context

“*sexual” –  Politico‘s Dylan Byers.

Matt Taibbi gonzo? Editor thinks not.

“For shame: Clarence Page describes Matt Taibbi as “gonzo author.” HST rolling in grave – w/fresh drink & loaded gun.” — RCP Executive Editor Tom Bevan on Rolling Stone‘s Taibbi being praised by Chicago Tribune‘s Page.

Writer knocks press knocking press

“Odd: this political press coverage doesn’t offer the possibility that political press coverage tends to be horrendous. Former White House speechwriter and The Atlantic writer Jon Lovett on Politico‘s story by Maggie Haberman and Glenn Thrush on President Obama and Mitt Romney‘s mutual disdain for the news media. Lovett charged, “Come on, @GlennThrush. Going on Fallon and the View might not be necessary if most political news coverage wasn’t so profoundly useless.”

Journo pulls all-nighter

“Nap Time have to pull an all nighter on book edits. I am so NOT feeling this author thing 2nd go round. Growllllsssssss!” — NBC theGrio’s Sophia Nelson.

Quotes of the Day

Politico Dylan Byers’ “sexy-ass” beard gets noticed

“@DylanByers Dylan, I saw u this AM on Bill’s show. WOW! U look better than the avatar. Nice hair, a sexy-ass beard. I luv a man w/a beard.” –unknown female named Rhonda. Byers appeared on Current TV’s Bill Press radio program Tuesday morning. Above is Dylan with and without his beard. Just like Fox News, we report, you decide. Tell us what you prefer at FishbowlDC@mediabistro.com.

Weather Blues

“Hopefully the rain will stop soon! It can make your day quite depressing.” — The Daily Caller‘s Pat McMahon. (This was yesterday, so hopefully Pat is enjoying the sunshine today.)

Baier trying to drop poundage

“Good morning – long exhausting workout this morning. Trying to drop some lbs – got to keep at it! Thoughts on the day?” — FNC’s Bret Baier.

Stop the Presses!

“@SophiaRedefined urgent call me on my cell phone right now!” –  American Urban Radio White House Correspondent April Ryan to Sophia Nelson, a columnist for NBC’s theGrio.com.

Deep Thoughts With Katherine Kennedy

“Having a bad day? I double dog dare you to compliment three people. Guaranteed to turn that frown upside down #giveback #keepinspiring.” — Katherine Kennedy, who describes herself as a “social impact investor” by day and “prevent cancer advocate” by night.

Viewer likes Michelle Fields for her brains, obviously

“My new big time crush from the political genre is @michellefields. She is such a babe.” — a PR intern in Scottsdale, Ariz. Ian Zymarakis referencing The Daily Caller‘s video journo Michelle Fields. This picture is from Michelle’s recent appearance on Fox News.

Whoa! Blogger talks to his wife

“Just spent an entire hour talking to Mrs. Other McCain. #DoesntHappenOftenEnough” — conservative blogger Robert Stacy McCain.

From the Dept. of Bragiculture…“My two-year-old likes the PBS Newshour. #nerdbrag” — Author Steve Edwards. This was RT by NewsHour.

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

Quotes of the Day

“I didn’t know men could be called Bimbo.” — Fox & Friends host Gretchen Carlson this morning while wearing a traditional Carlson short red dress that stops mid-thigh. Carlson was referring to a Newark security officer who assumed a dead man’s name for the past 20 years. Needless to say, the Nigerian man’s name isn’t his real name, which is Bimbo.

FNC Chris Wallace’s boring admission

“48 out of 52 weeks a year I have chicken.” — Fox News Sunday host Chris Wallace on Fox & Friends in an appearance with his wife Lorraine for her new book, Mr. Sunday’s Saturday Night Chicken not to be confused with Lorraine’s future book, Mr. Sunday’s Eating Disorders. Wallace’s favorite chicken is apparently some sort of faux fried chicken dish.

Dicking Around

“Courtyard Marriott so confused me I had to walk outside to find my way to the front door.” — CBS Political Director John Dickerson in an unusual state of confusion.

TV reporter gripes about failed delivery

“I hate it when you make an apt w/ a company to deliver a service at your home sometime in a 2 hr window, they don’t show & no call. FIRED!” — WJLA’s Mike Conneen.

Politico scribe wants to stay in Hilary loop

“Was away last week. Did I miss any big Hilary Rosen news?” — Politico‘s Alexander Burns on the CNN Contributor who recently went viral for a tiff with Ann Romney.

Journo questions black v. gay agenda at White House

“I mean how many times has the White House said that cannot discuss a ‘black agenda’-but a ‘gay agenda’ is fine????” — NBC theGrio columnist Sophia Nelson, who has been suffering from kidney stones. On Monday she was in discussion about a black versus gay agenda with American Urban Radio White House Correspondent April Ryan.

Roland on holy roll this morning

“Dear God, you easily lifted us out of a slumber this morning. May we have the courage to lift you up today & worship you without hesitation!” — CNN Contributor and “Washington Watch” host Roland Martin.

Disturbing headline from WUSA9: “Police: Man Had Sex With Woman While She Was Sleeping” — the story, however, is unclear and doesn’t quite match the headline. She woke up with the man on top of her. He had gone with her and her boyfriend to a picnic. Doesn’t explain the sex while sleeping part. Doesn’t say where her boyfriend was. Read the story full of gaping holes here.

Pre-wedding anxiety

“Feeling. Stressed!!! Time for tea and sitting still. And some dark chocolate. #weddingpleasedontkillme” — C-SPAN Producer Lauren Torlone.

Obama on ‘The View’: Uneventful?

“Pool Report on Obama’s appearance on The View: ‘He did not appear to make any major news.’ — The Nation‘s Ari Melber. Obama on ABC’s “The View” airs this morning at 11 a.m. ET.

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

Will the film ever get off the ground? Politico‘s Patrick Gavin brings us the story of Norman Kelley‘s plan to make a documentary about Charlie Peters, former founder and editor of The Washington Monthly, which is now bimonthly. But will the film ever come to fruition? So far the film has raised $1,685 and they need $15,000. By today. And this is Kelley’s big sell of Peters: “Charlie Peters is not a sexy guy,” Kelley told Politico. “He’s not a sexy subject. … It’s just hard to raise money on a film about a guy from the past. … It’s hard raising money for a documentary film if you’re not Ken Burns or Michael Moore, particularly about a journalist who’s not a sexy journalist on one of the television talk shows.” Read the full story here. Publish time: 4:36 a.m.

Arianna discusses philandering father – Mother’s Day brings up poignant memories. HuffPost-AOL Editor-in-Chief Arianna Huffington penned an op-ed in the NYT over the weekend. It’s called “Greek Tragedy.” In her walk down memory lane in Athens, she recalls her father’s unsuccessful attempt to own a newspaper as well as his cheating habit. “It wasn’t the bankruptcy that got to my mom in the end, but the philandering,” she wrote. Read here.

Media failure or fairness? — With opinion journalism being all the rage these days, Media Matters took the networks to task Sunday for hosting conservatives like Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council and former GOP Presidential hopeful Gary Bauer, both of whom fiercely oppose same-sex marriage. They called it “Easy Sunday for Group Hate Leader on CNN, CBS.” The writer, Jocelyn Fong, says if she ever has kids someday she’ll get to tell them about the President’s historic announcement, but she’ll also have to inform them that the networks gave “hate group leaders” a platform for their views. Perkins turned up on CNN’s State of the Union with Candy Crowley and on CBS’s Face the Nation with Bob Schieffer. Tsk. Tsk. Fong says Schieffer never challenged Perkins. Instead, the newsman agreed with Perkins that he was glad to allow all sides of the debate. (Which psst… is kind of the point of journalism in the first place.) Read the full story here.

Quotes of the Day

Question to Ponder: “How many dumb people are going to think that President Obama is actually gay now?” — HuffPost‘s Ethan Klapper.

Quote Taken Out of Context

“And then @RadioBabe called me an asswipe. #nprlife” — NPR Elections Producer Arnie Seipel. Before that, he said, “Being serenaded on a Friday afternoon by @RadioBabe singing Patsy Cline’s Crazy.” Radio Babe is NPR Correspondent Andrea Seabrook.

Writer wonders about ‘prissy’ Cranbrook

“Why do prep schools have such so often have such prissy names? ‘Cranbrook?’” — Tucson Sentinel Technorati writer Jimmy Zuma, referring to the Michigan prep school Mitt Romney attended and site of the haircut incident.

A Boybander’s Emotional Admission

“Running is the only healthy thing I genuinely love to do but more and more my body’s telling me I shouldn’t. Having a hard time dealing.” — TPM‘s Brian Beutler.

Self-appointed Media Critic

“Why do I get the impression that news magazines would put *anything* on their covers to sell 5 extra copies?” — Politico‘s Roger Simon.

Unnecessary Tweet of the Day

“Just spotted in Santa Monica: car with Hawaii plate ALOHA. Car with most desired Hawaii license plate belongs in Hawaii.” — MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell with this stellar announcement you won’t likely see anywhere else in the next decade.

Journo sees connection to Prez’s fundraiser

“Obama fundraiser in NYC Monday — special guest Ricky Martin — is sold out, organizer says. Gee. Wonder why?” — Politico‘s Glenn Thrush.

Eddie Scarry contributed to this report.