Unfortunately, this happens off camera, so we don’t know what the bodyguard did. Hell, we don’t even know if the bodyguard even touched Boyle. So, what really happened? We reached out to Daily Caller NonSpokeswoman Nicole Roeberg and to Boyle himself to inquire what injuries he suffered from the ordeal and whether he called in the attack to the police. Shockingly, neither one is talking.

So, what’s the deal? Boyle seems to have made the whole thing up. His headline says that the bodyguard “assaults” him. There is no assault on tape. Is Boyle so fragile that the mere presence of a bodyguard makes him tremble and cry “assault”? The bodyguard barely even raises his voice at Baby Boyle. Come on, Boyle. Surely, you have enough balls to take a little talking-to and not turn it into an “assault.” Maybe next time you should do your report with a pacifier in your mouth, you big baby.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Watch here.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Today The Stuttering Foundation of American, based in Mempis, Tenn., announces their 2012 journalism award winners. Coming in first place in the blog category is CNN Contributor Bob Greene for featuring former National Stuttering Awareness Week Spokesperson Annie Glenn (wife of former Sen. John Glenn). Other award winners include Pedro Frisneda of El Diario and and Aldo Santin of the Winnepeg Free Press. Read and watch Greene’s story here.

“Journalists in a variety of settings have done an outstanding job of focusing on stuttering during the past year,” said Jane Fraser, president of the 65-year-old nonprofit foundation. “We are seeing a significant shift in how we reach people – not only through newspapers and columnists but also through websites and blogs. We are particularly excited about increased outreach in Canada and within the Spanish speaking community.”

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Bloomberg Government’s sales department is experiencing an aftershock. Yet another salesperson is leaving the entity more readily known as BGOV. This time it’s Joanna Matthews who will become National Sales Director of CQ Roll Call, where she worked previously. Matthews is being replaced by Rob Recklaus, who is now leading the Congressional sales team for BGOV. “Having served as Communications Director and Chief of Staff for Rep. Carolyn McCarthy (D-N.Y.) for eight years he has a deep understanding of our client,” said a Bloomberg spokesman, explaining that Recklaus has been on the Congressional sales team at BGOV since 2010.

The tremors may not end anytime soon. An executive at a Washington-based competitor says there have been a number of BGOV editors and writers looking for work within the past two weeks.

On Wednesday morning, as we reported, Bloomberg fired three top BGOV sales personnel, including the head of sales Leon Frazier. Frazier has since been replaced by Josh Eastright, who was already working there. They’re now expanding Eastright’s sales duties to include BGOV.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

The good– “Paige” is the name of a new hologram that greets travelers at the international terminal at Dulles airport, according to a Wednesday feature in the Washington Examiner by Liz Essley. The hologram is a life-size attractive woman who can talk (but not respond) to people as they make their way through customs. “This kind of 3-D image really gives it a personal feel. It actually looks like a real person,” said Dennis Hazell, associate executive staff coordinator for the airport. Paige may look like a real person, but she doesn’t look like the average person you run into at the airport. The average person you run into at the airport is usually an overweight man who either feels you up, demands a tip for doing minimal work or honks the shuttle horn as you’re minding your business.

The porky– WaPo ran a feature by Tim Carman this week about the pork industry’s move to get farm pigs out of those tiny gestation crates and into a more free-roaming environment. That is, at least before they’re hacked to death and finely shredded for barbeque pork sandwiches across the country. In the story we learn that some states have passed laws banning the use of gestation crates by a public referendum, sometimes with 60 percent of the vote. Paul Shapiro, veep of farm animal protection for the Humane Society, puts that in terms we can all understand: “Imagine if a political candidate won with two-thirds of the vote… It’s a political slaughter.”

The porkier– Actress Queen Latifah has been outed. Though she serves as a spokeswoman for the weight loss program Jenny Craig, Latifah is also a part owner of the Fatburger franchise. We learn this in a feature aggregated by Samantha Schnurr of The Daily Caller. “Fatburger’s menu items include a 24-ounce Triple Kingburger, chili cheese Fat Fries, onion rings, and 16-ounce milkshakes,” the story says.

The deceptive– Is this an ad or a feature about new homes in Maryland by Michele Lerner, special to TWT? The article, headlined “New in Maryland: Park Ridge,” appears in TWT‘s Home & Living section but it reads like a classified: “Each home in this Montgomery County community will include a brick front, a poured-concrete foundation with a brick design, professional landscaping, an asphalt driveway and a two- or three-car garage.” At the end: “For more information or directions, call community sales manager [blank] or visit [blank].” We ran a search on Lerner and indeed, her LinkedIn profile says she’s a freelance writer specializing in real estate.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

NJ

Terris reported that blood trickled out of a gash in his head — an injury that eventually landed him in the ER. But for now, he wrote, “The lingering buzz from the predawn whiskey shot helps.”

The reporter felt compelled to learn more about Ross since his publication had ranked him among the top 10 conservative members of Congress. “You should come boar hunting with me sometime,” Ross had told him a few weeks prior.

An excerpt:

Ross leaned forward in his seat to size up my multicolored socks, my oversized glasses, my untamed hair. “Of course, if it makes you more comfortable, we can donate all the meat to a food bank,” he said. It was a diplomatic gesture. If Ross had overestimated how much I might object to killing an animal for sport, I could forgive him. In Washington, people tend to rely on signals to get a sense of each other: party affiliations, voting records, socks. Subtleties get lost. I started thinking that the only way to really understand Dennis Ross would be to join him in his natural habitat.

Read the full story here.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

The couple heads to Europe next week. And from our best translation skills, looks like they’re headed to glorious Italy. “@BetsyMTP Finalized all details of your ‘luna di miele’ — see you tomorrow! #ladolcevita”

Thorp wouldn’t comment any further on the newlyweds’ honeymoon plans.

Bon voyage! Let’s hope they abandon their respective Twitter accounts for a few days.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

It’s time for more “caking” at WaPo. That would be cake used as a verb for yet another departing journalist who took the buyout. This time it’s Ben de la Cruz, who leaves next month after 12 years to join NPR as the multimedia editor on the Science Desk. They will miss Ben’s “devotion to the craft.”

See the internal memo that does not mention the buyout…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Politico CLICK is still at it, creating gossip you won’t (and shouldn’t) see anywhere else. This week they reported on — what a scoop — Bob Dylan sporting shades at the White House Tuesday.

The headline (no joke): “Bob Dylan wears sunglasses at the White House.”

(We interrupt this item to ask VandeHarris: Do you guys read this stuff before it gets published?)

Caitlin McDevitt goes on to write her vanilla lede: “Bob Dylan sported shades at the White House on Tuesday. The singer wore aviator sunglasses to accept the Medal of Freedom from President Obama who praised him for his career accomplishments.” She names Tony Morrison, John Glenn and former Sec. of State Madeleine Albright as other recipients. WAIT. Did they wear sunglasses too?

So let’s get this straight: Dylan wore SUNGLASSES?

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

WaPo

And now, his note…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Chipotle Beef.

“Folks, how was my pronunciation of Chipotle?” asked host Chuck Todd.

(Sounds like you’ve been practicing, Chuck! In our expert opinion it was perfection.)

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Newt gives Chris Matthews a compliment (of sorts)

On MSNBC’s Morning Joe this morning, former GOP hopeful Newt Gingrich called Chris Matthews “slightly whacked” and says that’s why he’s kept his show for so long.

Ingraham dings Deutsch and Dr. Oz

“OMG–Donny Deutsch & Dr Oz talking G Spots on CNN now. Get a room!” — Conservative radio host Laura Ingraham. MSNBC Contributor Donny Deutsch filled in for CNN’s Piers Morgan last night. They also discussed healthy versus unhealthy livers.

Politico Playbook Weirdness

See what happens when Politico‘s Mike Allen takes several days off?

“Did anyone else get a May 17 version of Playbook delivered this morning?” — PBS Newshour’s Christina Bellantoni. WCP‘s Managing Editor Mike Madden quickly replied, “Haven’t gotten it yet at all today. Been pretty screwy for few weeks. I signed up for official version instead of Mikey’s send.”

Bird commits attempted thievery against journo

“Bird just scared the sh*t out of me as it tried to steal my muffin. #AttackCafe” — FBDC and The Blaze‘s Eddie Scarry in an early morning tweet. Eddie later told me, “Seriously, it was like that movie ‘The Birds.’ They’re the tiny harmless ones but I was honestly afraid because they travel in flocks.” He added, “One bird flew onto my muffin (that sounds dirty) and picked at it before I shooed it away. But then several came to gang up on it.” Be safe, Eddie.

From the Peanut Gallery…“Today’s Style section has got to be the dullest the Washington Post has ever produced!!!!” — DCRTV’s Dave Hughes, who is really like family to FBDC.

Guardian features condom q

“@guardianstyle wear a condom or use a condom?” — Jessica Lake. In response, Guardian Style replied,”That’s a very personal question for a grammar microblog, Jessica.”

Journo questions Tina’s news judgement

“Why does Tina Brown think Americans care about the #british royal family as much as she does?” — Barbara Slavin, Washington correspondent for Al-Monitor.com.

And now, a semi-polite request from The Daily Beast columnist and MSNBC Contributor Meghan McCain: “If you are going to excerpt my book without permission – please don’t bastardize the context of my statements. The book is meant to be read.” Her new book: America, You Sexy Bitch.

Highly Unnecessary Tweet of the Day

“Perfect park slope lunch: salami, mozzarella, eggplant and peppers sandwich from the pork store and granita from what used to be ozzies.” — The Nation‘s Ben Adler, who spent the bulk of Wednesday pouting about this item on The Nation‘s illustrious Editor-at-Large and MSNBC Host Chris Hayes. The only contender for this feature came from conservative blogger Robert Stacy McCain: “Just woke up from a LONG nap.” Thanks for sharing Stacy!

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Fast-forward to this past Sunday’s episode of ABC’s “This Week” in which Will referred to Trump as “this bloviating ignoramus.”

Responding at lightening speed, Trump tweeted, “George Will may be the dumbest (and most overrated) political commentator of all time. If the Republicans listen to him, they will lose.”

The crew at FNC’s “The Five” discussed and it led to Eric Bolling saying this: “You know what Donald Trump represents? He represents a new Republican, a new GOP, a new conservative, where it’s not the old, established, George Will, boring out of their mind, bored out of your mind listening to him in Washington.”

Does this mean Will will lose his spot on “This Week” to Trump? The jury’s still out on that one. But let’s compare the two.

Here we have George Will

Age: 71

Hair: Hazelnut #81, purchased at your nearest men’s grooming store.

Education: Princeton University

Spouse: Mari Maseng, Republican consultant who previously worked on Texas Gov. Rick Perry‘s presidential campaign before he withdrew from the race.

TV behavior: Subdued, pensive and professorial. Will is someone you can listen to if you’re older than 30 and/or are stocked up on Ritalin.

Best on-air moment: We’ll get back to you on that.

Controversy: As mentioned above, a column by Will in March offered up an alternative plan to Republicans that assumed the GOP wouldn’t win the presidency in the November election. It caused a ruckus in the conservative media and got the attention of the guy conservatives want to piss off the least: Rush Limbaugh. Will was asked to clarify his column and did a little backtracking on “This Week,” saying, “At this point, I would say no, keep fighting [for the presidency], but prepare to retrench.”

Famous relative: Will’s wife Mari Maseng is well-known in Republican politics and worked as a speechwriter in the Reagan White House.

Workload: Twice-weekly column for WaPo, news analyst for ABC and regular panelist on the network’s Sunday program “This Week.”

Accomplishments: Pulitzer Prize winner.

And here’s Donald Trump

Age: 65

Hair: Scorched, tossed, turned, flipped, pressed, twirled…in short, a disaster.

Education: Wharton School of Business, University of Pennsylvania

Spouse: Melania Knauss, a former model.

TV behavior: Obnoxiously loud, confrontational and generally dismissive of everything that can’t be tied back to his wealth.

Best on-air moment: His interview with “Entertainment Tonight” from 2006 in which he called TV personality Rosie O’Donnell the following: “disgusting,” “a slob,” “bad people,” “a disaster,” “fat,” “ugly,” “chubby,” “unattractive both inside and out,” “fat ass” and “a loser.”

Controversy: Relentless birther.

Famous relatives: Three of Trump’s five children, Ivanka, Donald, Jr. and Eric are involved in the production of Trump’s successful NBC show “The Apprentice.”

Workload: President of The Trump Organization, Host of “The Apprentice,” occasional candidate for president of the United States, author.

Accomplishments: Billionaire, New York Times bestselling book

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Rumors have been swirling about layoffs at Bloomberg Government. This morning three senior sales people were let go. They include President of Sales Leon Frazier, Industry Leads Sandra Baer and Butch Musselman. All three were initial hires in 2010, prior to BGov’s launch in 2011.

We’ve requested comment from Bloomberg PR.

UPDATE: This morning BGOV installed a new head of sales: Josh Eastright. His new role will be head of sales and customer support for BGOV. He will continue as Global Head of Sales and Customer Support for Bloomberg New Energy Finance. They are not reducing the head count whatsoever and are adding sales people and analysts.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.