‘Polishing a Diamond’

As we noted last week, the Post launched staff-written critiques yesterday. The write-ups, three a day, will be posted on the paper’s internal bulletin board system. Yesterday’s first installment saw contributions from Keith Richburg, education reporter Valerie Strauss and Outlook’s Wendy Ross.

Their impressively full write-ups are after the jump. They had several similar complaints, from the poor color reproduction in places to quibbles with the section front key boxes. Overall, though, a lot of praise for jobs well-done too.

Looking at the Post online yesterday, our favorite was this headline: “British Army Troops Raid N. England Homes.” Think someone over at the Post has been reading a bit too much of David McCullough’s new book, 1776?
As we noted last week, the Post launched staff-written critiques yesterday. The write-ups, three a day, will be posted on the paper’s internal bulletin board system. Yesterday’s first installment saw contributions from Keith Richburg, education reporter Valerie Strauss and Outlook’s Wendy Ross.

Their impressively full write-ups are after the jump. They had several similar complaints, from the poor color reproduction in places to quibbles with the section front key boxes. Overall, though, a lot of praise for jobs well-done too.

Looking at the Post online yesterday, our favorite was this headline: “British Army Troops Raid N. England Homes.” Think someone over at the Post has been reading a bit too much of David McCullough’s new book, 1776?

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This is the inaugural edition of the Post daily critique by staff members. Today’s contributors are Keith Richburg, Valerie Strauss and Wendy Ross:

KEITH RICHBURG

Today’s Post, like most days, had a lot of good news and enterprise. So this critique is more like polishing a diamond. And I hope to just offer some impressions here to provoke our thinking about the overall package. I’ll concentrate mainly on the front page.

First, the A1 display art of the Srebrenica massacre was a wise photo choice of an evocative event–and I couldn’t help but notice that the Times also chose a similar Srebrenica photo for its front page display. On our photo, though, I also couldn’t help noticing that the reproduction seemed poor–the colors seemed blurry or bleeding, the expressions on the faces barely visible (at least in my home-delivered edition in D.C.). The Times photo had much sharper color. Also, the color reproduction on other papers’ fronts seems much sharper and clearer than ours. This may not be something we can fix, but it is something noticeable.

My DC-Maryland edition, dropped on my doorstep in Adams-Morgan, had the richly-detailed story about Maryland’s intercounty connector route stripped across the top, with a nice map on the front, and a huge, detailed map across two pages inside showing the proposed route. The fact that the Governor is moving on this long-delayed project is a big issue of concern to many of our readers, and a lot of commuters, and thus deserving of the play. I was a bit puzzled, though, to read, almost near the end of the main story, the graph saying; “Despite yesterday’s pronouncements, the road faces hurdles. The next step is for the federal government to approve a proposed route….the state
legislature still could balk at the project’s escalating price tag…” and there is also a threat of legal action.

A closer read of the article informed me, of course, in the very lead sentence, that Ehrlich announced “that Maryland WANTS to build an east-west highway across the Washington suburbs….” And the sub-head said clearly, “Federal,. State Hurdles Remain.” So, my question was whether the main headline, “Md. Approves Intercounty Connector” and the tone of the top of the story, implied that this is all a done deal, and that construction is about to begin, when in fact, there are a lot of hoops for this. By contrast, our Virginia edition–that used the stay of execution as its top lead story–had what in retrospect to me seemed a more appropriate headline; “Md Picks Route For Connector.” Maybe that paragraph about the hurdles should have been moved up, and should have appeared on the front page before the jump.

Team Bush’s new silence strategy on the Rove-Plame leak investigation was great Washington political theater, as we played it just right on the front, I think. I also think Dana Milbank’s column did a great job capturing the escalating tension in the White House briefing room. At the bottom of A1, I think the story about China’s gap between the rich and the poor was crying out for better treatment, and a photograph to illustrate the persistance of rural poverty in a country with new urban skyscrapers and highways. And the one, small accompanying photo on A18 barely illustrated the point. Peter Goodman paints us a verbal portrait of villages with rutted dirt tracks, houses with wood stoves and mud floors, and farmer Wang with his shoes full of holes, juxtaposed next to a modernizing China of congested highways and shopping mall. Where was the art of that all? It seems to me a more open page inside would have allowed that story to get better, and more artistic treatment.

Then at the bottom of A1 is the story of the kids who rode in mom’s car trunk

First, full disclosure is required; a foreign story from Britain was bumped for that interesting yarn. And I’m sure the story of a woman who forced her kids to take turns riding in a car trunk will be fodder for cable news shows for days to come.

Now, I happen to really like kids, and don’t think they should be riding around in car trunks. But as I read closer to the end of the article, I discover that the back seat of the car actually flipped down, like a hatchback, so the kids could slide in there from the back seat, or at least be visible. In other words, they weren’t really enclosed in the trunk at all. The story says the back seat folded down to allow for larger packages to extend into the back seat. (I used to have a car like that, a Mercury Bobcat, in the 1980s). So theoretically, the little tike’s head would also be big enough to be in the open space. I guess I wonder whether this story really deserved front page treatment, on a day with a lot of other news competing for that precious front page real estate.

Finally, on A1, I look at our “INSIDE” keybox. It seems, on a casual read, that there is no particular order to our keys. Are they listed in priority order? First is a key to an A2 story on doctors hailing a settlement with an insurance company, followed by a D3 financial section story on the Acela train back in business. The Afghan prison break on A15 comes next, then a wacky story from Metro about a house overrun by 300 cats. Then, under a big photo cutline on a Hip-Hop festival, is the keybox headline “London’s Victims.” Does the placement of the “London’s Victims” headline under the Hip-Hop photo, and after the house of cats, inadvertantly say something about our priorities? Also, shouldn’t all the foreign stories be keyed together,, and not separated? And should the keys go in the order in which the articles appear in the paper–first, the A section stories, then B, then C, etc, etc?

Looking back, as Tuesday-morning quarterback, ditching the hip-hop photo would have allowed for a photo to go with the China story, and then not had that odd juxtaposition of a guy jumping and dancing on top of a key about victims of a terrible train bombing reflecting a “multicultural capital.”

Finally, I thought it puzzling that we made no mention on A1 of the Hurricane Dennis aftermath. There were two good stories on A3, including a nice reader by Manuel on poor V.K. Wiggins who lost his home. But it seemed odd to me that on Monday, we had a five column headline saying “Dennis Batter Florida Panhandle,” and on Tuesday, not even a key in the keybox.

As I said, these comments are all just like polishing a diamond. Overall, I think our package today was good, strong and newsy all through, with some terrific art on the Business Front and a great display front photo in Sports.

VALERIE STRAUSS

Splendid paper–all three zones.

EXCEPT:

FRONT PAGE:

The lede story, on the Maryland Intercounty Connector, would have been helped with language high up telling readers how much Ehrlich’s statement really moves the ball on the highway. It is late in the story that we learn that the legislature could balk at the price, and the story itself makes clear there are plenty of other hurdles that must be passed. The third graph has the Maryland Transportation Secretary declaring that construction will begin next year, but the history of this suggests that may be wishful thinking.

For readers not following the story of the Virginia man being granted a stay of execution, the lede probably should have made clear that the Supreme Court decision was rare and that this is an unusual case.

The mother-putting-the-kids-in-the-trunk story seemed like a good Metro front story, not something for the front page. This is not a question of a mother trying to kill her kids. The story says she put them there–however idiotically–and tried to ensure they had air and light by maneuvering the back seat.

Well-done story on Bork, but it left me wondering why it was there today. If Bush chooses Gonzalez, this story may well be irrelevant. If he picks another judge where this same scenario could play out, it seems to me we will have to tell this Bork story again–so why not wait? Also: the front-page paragraphs neglect to mention that we are talking about the Supreme Court. It is presumed that people will know which court is meant. Most will, but….

The story in the Foreign News section out of Afghanistan, about four Arabs Escaping from a U.S. prison there, a prison from which they shouldn’t have been able to escape, was perhaps worthy of the front page. It also included the news that the body of the last SEAL had been found, a subject we should pursue. What does the loss of the 16 men, eight of them SEALS and the others presumably specially trained Army servicemen, do to the counterinsurgency efforts we are conducting in Afghanistan?

The story on A3 about the Senate rethinking proposed cuts in mass-transit security funds was a potential front-page story, given the fact that London subway trains were just attacked and security is on many minds and the Senate is debating how to handle the protection of American citizens. This would be a good time to delve deep in exactly how much the administration has and hasn’t done to protect Americans. It was twinned with the Bush story on the page, but the subject remains worthy of the front-page.

Good China story. The second graf suggests Wang Huazhong’s life in his rural village hasn’t changed in 46 years, though the story is actually about how China’s entry in the World Trade Organization 3 1/2 years ago has affected the country, and goes on to say how much harder Wang’s life is as a result.

In our stories on the Valerie Plame case, it might be helpful each time we tell people that Judith Miller is in jail that other reporters managed to avoid going to jail.

The story about Van Hollen not running for the Senate, which was in Metro, is a big deal in parts of Maryland and should have been keyed from the front–at least in the Maryland edition.

OTHER THOUGHTS:

*Allan Sloan’s column on the second page of Business about how a tiny Chinese government-run company can outbid Chevron Corp. for Unocal explores the issues well for people not familiar with the subject, which The Post has done a good job of exploring. But it’s a huge story whose many implications we should still better explain in the news pages. Weisman’s story on the Business front about Bush’s top independent intelligence adviser was interesting and possibly a front-page candidate but was tough to follow.

*Re the layout of the Style front: Looked a bit unbalanced to have a story is stripped across much of the bottom with only a few lines of type in each column.

*On Page F3 of the Health section, there is a five-paragraph report under the regular slug “Drug Watch” about a warning the FDA is planning to add to Concerta and about controversy over whether the FDA is doing the right thing. Concerta, it says, is used by 8 million Americans. They all don’t live in this area, but surely thousands of them do, and this is the kind of information many people might like to see more prominently in the paper. Broad issues involving medicine and health matter to people, and we could do more with these subjects. When half the newsroom is home with the flu, or can’t breathe because of mind-numbing allergies, then it might be an indicator that there is something going on affecting many of our readers that they might want to know about. There is also so much controversy with the FDA that it might be a good topic for investigation.

*Marc Fisher’s column on the Metro front is a good reminder about the need to delve deeper into the District government culture that never seems to make much headway into solving intractable social problems, even with its $4.95 billion budget surplus.

MOST AMUSING BIT: John Kelly’s column–especially where he has to explain to the humor deprived that he was kidding when he told people to sign all their new checks the moment they arrive in the mail.

WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT: The ice pick displayed in the Foreign section that, it appears, was used to kill Trotsky in Mexico.

WENDY ROSS

At the outset, please allow me to say that I approach this assignment with trepidation and humility, because, over my very long years working for newspapers, if there has been a mistake that can be made, I’ve made it (and, alas, sometimes more than once). I suppose one could thus be considered an “expert” of sorts–on what not to do.

I hope you will also permit me to offer a bit of context, as, much to my chagrin, there now are so many staff members whom I have never met. This will not be a rambling preamble (a preramble?), I promise, but I thought it might be useful to know a touch about my professional background and design philosophy as a basis for considering the comments in this message and those to come, which will primarily emphasize questions of presentation. I apologize that today I’ve been able so far only to read the A section…. I promise to do better in the future!

I’ve been at The Post since 1977, with a stint from 1998 to 2003 at the International Herald Tribune. Before coming to The Post, I was employed at five other newspapers. Assignments have included: reporter, women’s pages editor (now you know I’m really old), copy editor, wire editor, magazine editor, layout editor and art director. From 1993 to 1998, I was AME for The Post’s News Desk. Each of the newspapers for which I’ve worked was produced with hot metal at the time I joined them (now you know I’m REALLY old). If any of you takes
violent exception to my views and wants a face-to-face discussion, you can now find me in Outlook, where I am immediately recognizable, as I am the only staff member (so far) with a she-devil tattoo.

I’ve always thought of being a news layout/design person as slightly akin to being a physicist (albeit one who doesn’t have to do the really tough math)–in the sense that he/she constantly considers issues of space and time. And there seems never to be enough of either! Producing effective design, for a cover page or for an entire section, is thus the art of the possible, and, on some days, nearly the impossible. What, within these constraints, contributes to effective design? I use these measures for evaluating the success of a page or section:

Is it:

* readable–does it signal instantly to a reader the significance and salient content of the article or articles?

* appropriate–do the elements that compose each package properly reflect its nature?

* clear–are the elements logically arranged to permit ease of readership?

* balanced–does it follow basic principles of design that offer a cohesive whole?

* hierarchichal–does it help readers discern the relative importance of events?

* consistent–does it employ basic typographical elements in unified ways?

* organized–does it package related material to help readers appreciate connections among events or ideas?

* surprising–does it offer readers something visually unexpected or whimsical or intriguing?

I’m sorry, this IS prerambly. So, herewith:

These guidelines are being applied to the District and Maryland final editions of the A section of today’s newspaper. Each set of comments includes general thoughts and quibbles.

Front page:

General: In each of the editions, this page led with the Maryland approval of the Intercounty Connector route as a five-column strip, and off-led with the stay of execution for Robin Lovitt. The page meets the standards outlined above, with the exception of the surprising–but one should not force that, as one then risks being inappropriate, of course. The page has good contrast of vertical and horizontal elements; photographs and the map are well spaced; sizes
are varied and suited to their content.

Quibbles:

*ICC–I wish there could have been an imaginative way to include more of a sense of the time that discussion of ICC project has entailed; the first key, “Fifty-plus years of starts and stops,” helps. But for many readers not familiar with this saga, it might have been helpful to made this aspect more apparent. The map was a huge plus, though both copies of the newspaper I saw had color registration problems, and the reversed (white) text was small enough that it was difficult to read. Using a map to key to the inside map was an excellent
idea–and the inside map was excellent. I especially liked the fact that it showed the rejected routes.

*China–The narrative lead on the piece was lovely, but: On both pages, the so-what paragraph was inside the paper, with only the world “but” on the cover. Perhaps this might entice some readers immediately to turn to the jump, but it would have been better if a way could have been found to include the entire sentence on the front page.

*Hip-hop key–I immediately wanted to know where this festival was taking place. The key does not say.

*Layout item–I confess I am a “square-off” champion, and would have preferred to see an alignment of the “trunk” and “Bork” headlines to achieve clean, consistent horizontal white space.

Inside A:

General AND quibbles, all squished together:

*The National section was obviously very tight; except for Page 3, there was virtually no illustrative relief on the pages, which were further constrained by difficult L-shaped holes. Despite this, the content was logically packaged.

*The ICC package was well done, and the “Starts and Stops on the ICC” was excellent added value.

Quibble: Had there been space, it would have been nice to have the hurricane package on Page 3 with larger art and perhaps boxed. A horizontal presentation might have been more effective, but, of course, “going horizontal” and using boxes requires additional space that may simply not have been available.

*The Foreign pages had the advantage of including two that were open, offering more opportunity for creative layout. Still, the World News page seemed a bit gray. This will seem contradictory, but I wondered whether the very small picture of Blair was useful, and if that space might better have been allocated to making the main display image a bit larger. I very much liked the use of a photograph in the Briefs column.

*Federal Page: The blog samples were eye-catching and would, I hope, draw readers to the piece.

Quick notes elsewhere:

*Quibble: On the otherwise handsome Style front, the “Closet” story run was much too shallow. I understand the desire to have the piece on the cover, but it seemed to be one element too many.

*Yay: On the handsome Sports front, wonderful pictures, well played.

Quibble: The “British” story run was a bit too short,…again, the graph with the point of the story spanned both front and jump.

Thank you for being patient with me. . .and I’m happy to discuss any comments with which you may have your own quibbles.

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