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Why Washington D.C. Gossip Sucks

In what falls into the this is not even gossip category, The Hill’s Judy Kurtz—editor of The Hill’s so-called gossip blog (gossip, we thought, was a keyword)—brought us a most absurd story yesterday about President Obama‘s workout routine that reeks so much of a publicist’s pitch that it might’ve been more interesting had the publicist been allowed to write it.

The story is all about what Extra host and “Saved By the Bell” alum Mario Lopez says about the President’s workouts. Lopez is qualified to comment on this and it merits a story because he a) spoke directly to the President once b) has a well-known 12-pack and c) has his own line of underwear.

For those wondering about the big question here—namely, when such a busy guy like the President finds time to work out—the astounding answer, according to Lopez, is in the morning. And also, whenever else he can. A few questions: 1. Does anyone give a sh*t? 2. See question #1. 3. See question #2.

The best part of the whole piece, though, is that Kurtz runs out of creative ways to refer to Obama somewhere around her very first reference. She starts out with “commander-in-chief,” but by the  final graph she’s calling him “the White House resident.” No, really.

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