Is WaPo’s Gene Weingarten OK? His latest column is pretty weird. Granted, most of what Weingarten writes is pretty weird, but this actually got our attention. He starts out by writing a love letter to his dog. Weingarten says:
“Her jowls are Churchillian, and she uses them with statesmanlike eloquence. Her eyes are bright and expressive, even if the sentiment they usually express is some variant of ‘Huh?’ She is given to idiosyncratic head tilts that can express inquisitiveness, defiance or concern. Her ears are enormous, heroic things, and though they are too large for her to prick up, she can raise and lower them like matador capes, as semaphores for her mood.”
The dog’s name is “Murphy“, though by his description, he should have named her “Helen Thomas.” Weingarten then talks about an encounter he and his dog had with a mouse. As Gene was working in the dining room, he and his dog saw a mouse walking across the floor. He (Gene, not Murphy or the Mouse) proceeds to conjure up an imaginary conversation that he had with his dog and the mouse. Here’s an example of the banter.
Murphy: I’m definitely thinking of getting up and doing something about this. I wonder if those things have teeth.
Murphy: Okay, I am getting up now, real slow and loud and squirmy-like, with a great deal of unnecessary lateral motion.
Mouse: (looking up) YIKES!!!
Just to be clear… A Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist for the WaPo did an entire column on a fake conversation he had with animals. Either Gene has watched one too many Disney movies or he’s high on bath salts.