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Posts Tagged ‘Ian Swanson’

Morning Chatter

Quotes of the Day

Kurtz has stuff to figure out

“Thanks for messages and tweets about new Fox show. Still have lots of details to figure out, but what a challenge.” — CNN but soon-to-be Fox News’ Howard Kurtz.

Speaking of openings at CNN…

“If I hate myself, does that make me a media critic? #IhearThereIsAnOpening?” — CNN’s John Berman. Kurtz’ post on “Reliable Sources” will be filled by a rotating cast of hosts that haven’t been named yet.

Kim/Kanye baby name fallout

“Why did Kimye let Sarah Palin name their baby?? #North #wtf#” — The Times of LondonMatt Spence.

“I’m not sure I follow the logic of naming a kid after an airline that no longer exists.” — Politico‘s Ben White.

“Are we being pranked? Is this a resurrection of a defunct airline where I still have miles? A DC neighborhood? Apple lkg bttr and better.” — NPR’s Kitty Eisele.

“This poor child,” — Roll Call‘s Emily Cahn.

“Also, currently arguing with my 13-year-old sister about the name of this Kardashian kid. Good lord.” — WaPo columnist Clinton Yates.

“Troll West.” — ReutersMegan McCarthy.

“Seven. Seven Costanza. Now THERE’S a name.” — CNN Contributor Kevin Madden.

“If my parents named me North West I’d have to kick my own ass.” — BuzzFeed‘s Andrew Kaczynski.

“That’s like me naming my child Seth.” — NYT Communications Associate Jordan Cohen.

“Kanye must be trying working some sort of ‘Boy Named Sue’ angle here.” — Free Beacon‘s CJ Ciaramella.

Politico Playbook Publish Time: 7:52 a.m.

AnonymASS and Anonymous Tipsters: 1. “ass holes.” 2. “Marty … need … more … Marty” Memo to #1. We love your candor. Don’t go changing. However, “ass holes” is actually written “assholes.” And #2: Your wish is our command. Never a shortage of material there.

Emotional sports watching

“To the guy wearing a Golden State jersey at game 7: you are an idiot. Oh, oh oh oh shut up.” — The Hill‘s Ian Swanson.

N-word-using Paula Deen sparks N-word debate

“LOL I sound ‘old’ @bdotm for having zero tolerance against the N-word? Good. I’d rather sound ‘old’ and be right than ‘young” and dumb.” — “Washington Watch’s” Roland Martin.

Speechwriter trash talk

“Lovett with no editor and 20,000 followers should scare people almost as much as his refusal to wear pants to work” — Jon Favreau, former speechwriter to President Obama. Now a consultant. His message is directed to Jon Lovett, also a former presidential speechwriter who sometimes writes for The Atlantic.

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Morning Chatter

Quotes of the Day

WTF Central: “Baby with blowpops coming out of its head.”Rare‘s Tabitha Hale.

Reporter accidentally leaves home unlocked

“The moment you discover you left the keys in the front door all night … #eek” — Fox News’ Shannon Bream, who covers the Supreme Court.

This is a good thing, right?

“The men’s room at a New Kids on the Block concert is more empty than the Obama Administration’s foreign policies.” — Cameron Gray, producer and reporter for NRA News.

The Observer

“Is it just me or are trends getting stupider?” — BuzzFeed‘s Evan McMorris-Santoro in reaction to this from ABC: “Experts Warn Eyeball Licking Trend Can Injure the Eye, Damage Sight.”

“‘When we get to questions and answers, [pool reporter] is going to leave and we can talk about what you want to talk about,’ Biden in Calif.” — Washington Examiner White House Correspondent Brian Hughes.

Quote taken way out of context

“A rectal-vaginal fistula is worse.” — WaPo “humor” columnist Gene Wengarten.

Fun times at a glance: flag-making

“Thanks to @Hyatt #Lost Pines — great family getaway. Flag-making, fishing, nighttime deer & armadillo spotting in the golf carts!” — Conservative radio host Laura Ingraham.

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Morning Chatter

Quotes of the Day

HIPSTER: “Dr. Paul Pellicci my amazing surgeon, dropped by the office to take me and my new hip for a walk.” — HuffPost-AOL Editor-in-Chief Arianna Huffington.

Best line of the Day: “Because I have the right as a senator to have no comment and who the hell are you to tell me I can or not?” — Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) to CNN Congressional Producer Ted Barrett on why he didn’t attend the Benghazi hearing. Apparently it was an er, office scheduling error. WTF? McCain later made nice and went on CNN’s “Piers Morgan Tonight” Thursday night. Barrett knows how to rile lawmakers. Some may recall his interaction with ex-Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-N.Y.) last year at an impromptu presser on Capitol Hill in which Weiner refused to discuss his weinerous behavior. Barrett persisted and Weiner called him a “jackass.” Need a refresher? Watch hereImportant q to ponder: Would McCain have lashed out at CNN’s Dana Bash like this? Somehow we can’t imagine it.

Journo is anti-Aidan (from Sex & the City) 

“All right, time to quit hiring Aidan from Sex & the City as a voice actor. I’m used to him doing Applebee’s, now also Medicare drug plans?” — The Hill‘s Sam Baker.

Fate of Twinkies hangs in the balance

“Fox: ‘The end of Twinkies could be only hours away.’” — WaPo media opinion writer Erik Wemple.

In other mysterious life news…

“Moved furniture so the cable guy can come fix everything tomorrow. Sat down and turned on the TV and it miraculously works. #wtf” — National Journal Daily Production Editor Michelle Bloom.

It’s the little things in life.

“Krispy Kreme donuts in the office. My day just improved.” — The Hill‘s Ian Swanson.

Reporter misses print pub

“Small world problems: I don’t think I’m alone here on Capitol Hill when I say I really miss having a print edition of CQ daily.” — USA Today‘s Susan Davis.

A lawmaker is overheard, sounds like an asshole and the W Hotel is a disappointment to a certain Bloomberg reporter…Also: Find out who’s heading up our FishbowlDC Fan Club Board… Read more

The Hill’s Managing Editor Gets Punk’d

As some reporters know only too well, The Hill‘s Managing Editor Bob Cusack is something of a professional prankster. Well, halleluja, the tables have finally turned. Over the weekend, Cusack got a taste of his own medicine when, while dining at the Greene Turtle in Fairfax, Va., a young boy approached and asked for his autograph.

Turns out it was the 10-year-old son of Cusack’s colleague, Pete Kasperowicz, a reporter for the publication’s Floor Action Blog, who had put his son up to the prank. Cusack bought it. “Punk’d @PeteKTheHill convinced his son to come up to me at restaurant and say, ‘Can I get your autograph?’ I was speechless,” Cusack wrote on Twitter.

While it’s not the dirtiest prank we can imagine — Cusack deserves much worse — it is admirable that he fell for it, even temporarily. But beware. Little does Kasperowicz know that Cusack has already begun plotting. “I have to get him back,” he told FishbowlDC. All we can say, Pete, is watch your back. And even then you won’t see it coming.

To refresh your memories on what Cusack is capable of, back in December, 2009, Ian Swanson, The Hill‘s News Editor, innocently spilled coffee on his computer and destroyed it. So Cusack went ahead with his devil’s work and wrote him phony emails, pretending to be a company techy. He insisted that Swanson appear before staff and speak on the dangers of coffee and computers. Swanson agreed to it, before ultimately realizing Cusack was the culprit.

 

Good Morning FishbowlDC Readers

Quotes of the Day

Journos react to bizarre Cain ad

“Cain ad with chief of staff smoking attempts to make pitch to sullen teenagers.” — The Hill‘s Associate Editor Ian Swanson on Herman Cain‘s weird new smoking ad. He links here.

“Herman Cain’s smoking gum: the dumbest ad in the history of politics.” — The Guardian’s Richard Adams.

“I still say @TheHermanCain’s smile was the most entertaining part of the smoking ad.” — Roll Call‘s David Drucker.

Best of Lululemon murder trial tweets

From WTOP’s Neal Augenstein: “Books being read in courtroom during #Lululemon jury selection: 4 Blondes by Candace Bushnell, and Dreamfever by Karen Marie Moning.” And this…”Topics of discussion between potential #Lululemon jurors — the size of a dog’s paws, and the political future of Md Atty Genl Doug Gansler.” Follow Neal at @AugensteinWTOP.

One of our readers writes in on Twitter: “In the middle of a conference call, still, and I see the “tweets and tits” story. Thanks for causing me to choke on Cheez Its.” The story he’s referring to is this one. Another reader writes in from Napa Valley… “I’m in wine country in northern California. Sometimes, I come across, read items like this one and just wish that the whole bunch of em on the Hill could just chill out for a week (or much more) in the Napa Valley. Say, Calistoga, where they could all jump into a hot mud bath and splash mud at one another to vent all those pent-up aggressions and emotions. Please be sure to let the Calistoga resort owner know when Congress is coming. I’m sure they’ll want to be sure they have enough mud on hand!”

Ifill tries to one up Booker

“Lovely day today in Newark. (there, beat you to it @corybooker)” — PBS’s Gwen Ifill.

Uh oh.

“What goes around, comes around….That is my philosophy at the moment.” — The Daily Caller‘s Pat McMahon.

Journo hears beatings for greetings

“Voicemail says ‘to administer personal greetings press 3,’ but it sounds like ‘beatings’ which I suppose is what was on Qaddafi’s voicemail” — Slate and CBS’s John Dickerson.

The Hill’s O’Brien Moves On to MSNBC.com

Today is The Hill‘s Mike O’Brien‘s last day at the publication. O’Brien, who runs the Blog Briefing Room, has taken a job with MSNBC.com.

Associate Editor Ian Swanson remarked on Twiter, “True story: @MPOthehill showed me how to use Twitter. Today is his last day at The Hill. #nostaligia”

If you feel like hearing O’Brien’s voice, listen here.

Congratulations to O’Brien.

Rep. Cleaver’s Lusty ‘Satan Sandwich’ is Media Hit

There are phrases that consume the press with a voracity one might not expect. Rep. Joe Wilson‘s (R-S.C.) “You lie!” comes to mind. Speaker John Boehner‘s circa 2008 “crap sandwich” reference to the Wall Street bailout bill also rings bells. This morning that phrase is “Satan sandwich.”

Rep. Emanuel Cleaver (D-Mo.), in referring to the debt deal as a “Satan Sandwich,” is getting him a boatload of media attention. Deeply religious, Cleaver is no stranger to injecting biblical references into his political theater. As a United Methodist minister, he prays in his office and apartment several times a day. But Satan Sandwich? “If you lift the bun, what you see is antithetical to everything the great religions of the world teach. Which is take care of the poor, take of the aged,” he told MSNBC’s Chris Jansing Sunday night after first saying the phrase to a Roll Call reporter. “. . . I am concerned about this because we don’t know the details. And until we see the details, we’re going to be extremely non-committed, but on the surface it looks like a Satan sandwich.”

He reiterated his sandwich idea on Twitter this morning: “This deal is a sugar-coated satan sandwich. If you lift the bun, you will not like what you see.”

Mary Petrovic, Cleaver’s press secretary, assured that the quote came directly from Cleaver. “Oh this is a 100 percent original Cleaver quote,” she said. “It’s been very popular. We’ve gotten a lot of visibility on our Social Media sites. I’ve seen it quoted all over the Internet. I think he really nailed it.”

The Satan sandwich, however, is not new. The Urban Dictionary has a definition for it: “The chiefest of hell’s dark delights, it is said that just one bite of it arouses an unspeakable lust of terrific potency.” By early Monday the clever sandwich spread on a myriad of media outlets including MSNBC’s “Morning Joe,” Mediaite and buzzed loudly on Twitter.

The Hill‘s Ian Swanson: “Cleaver is winning the AM”

TPM‘s Brian Beutler: “Bacon-coated Satan sandwich.” He added, “If we’re being honest, sugar isn’t a very good sandwich coating, no matter what’s between the bread.”

ABC News White House Correspondent Jake Tapper: “Hold the Mayo”

NJ‘s Joshua Green: “Think I’ll skip lunch today.”

@WestWingReport: “What is this Satan Sandwich? Sounds like a hell of a good lunch. Is it deviled ham?”

Ben Shapiro, a conservative syndicated columnist who wrote 12 tweets on the Satan sandwich, came up with the “Rep. Cleaver Deli” and offered side dishes such as Lucifer roasted potatoes. The references grew weirder as he moved along. He began by saying he was “super confused” by Emanuel and wondered if the sandwich had deviled eggs in it.

After a female follower suggested it might be a  “sewage coated booger sandwich made by Satan” he presumed that the congressman gets drunk. “Maybe @repcleaver always substitutes Satan for ‘s—’? So when he gets drunk before he votes, he’s Satan-faced.” Shapiro also played devils advocate, asking, “Wouldn’t a Satan sandwich be a good thing? After all, it means we’ve killed and roasted Satan, and presumably coated him in sugar.”

Note to readers: The top Satan sandwich was first spotted on PajamasMedia from a reader.

The Hill’s Jeff Young Bids Farewell and Prepares for Bloomberg

Celebration-Drinks-600.jpg Scribes and friends gathered Tuesday night at Post Pub for The Hill’s health care guru Jeff Young‘s going away party.

A list of those who turned up last night: Young’s brother, Tim, his girlfriend, Sommer Mathis (who writes the DCist). Only co-workers and former co-workers were invited. (Full Disclosure: I worked with Young for many years and was invited to the soiree. So this post is going to be free of snark because I don’t have a bad thing to say about the guy.)

Jim Snyder, Roxana Tiron, Ian Swanson, Alex Bolton, JT Rushing, Jordan Fabian, Kevin Bogardus, Walter Alarkon, Kim Hart, Sean Miller, Emily Goodin, Sam Youngman, and Silla Brush. Representing The Hill’s alumni were Greenwire’s Mike Soraghan and The Atlantic’s Chris Good. Remarked Young: “My once-and-future colleague Patrick O’Connor broke my heart — not for the first time — by failing to show up and there’s a special place reserved in hell for Jared Allen, who brushed it off to go play sports or something.”

Young reflected on his time at the newspaper.
“It’s been a hell of a ride these past five years, capped off the a year-plus of health care reform insanity,” he wrote to FishbowlDC. “Mostly, there are some people I’m going to miss when I’m gone. (On a smaller scale, I’m really going to miss my Mac and will have to suffer Windows for the first time in years.)

“At the same time, there are only two people left in this news room, not counting Hugo [Gurdon] and Bob [Cusack], who’ve been here longer than I have. That alone might be a sign that it’s time to try something new. I’m also very excited about what we’ve got cooking at Bloomberg and I can’t wait to get started.”

We wish Young the best in his new job.

Journo Blizzard Videos Part I

dirty-dishes.jpg

Yes, it’s true. C-SPAN does dishes, not dirty dishes, but rather, gigantic satellite dishes. A warning: majorly wonky microwave talk ahead. Watch here.

And, how does C-SPAN Radio deal with the snow?
Bobbi Jackson from C-SPAN radio: “We’re just staying on the air,” she says, explaining how they’ve needed to be creative and retrieve the best of old material over the past few weeks.

Check out The Hill’s Ian Swanson on TV to the right of Jackson’s head. He miraculously made it to the C-SPAN offices to do “Washington Journal” on Wednesday morning and managed to not look like he’d been windblown through a blizzard.

Watch here.

Swanson, The Hill’s Coffee Spiller, Gets Punk’d

The Hill‘s News Editor Ian Swanson is still reeling after spilling coffee onto his computer last week and destroying it.

After his computer died, Swanson was understandably distressed. Apparently it’s not normal when a flashing briefcase with a question mark appears on your screen.

Managing Editor Bob Cusack (known for pulling elaborate pranks) went to work, e-mailing Swanson under a fake name, pretending to be a techy at corporate headquarters.

Swanson was told the incident would be put in his employee file. In order for the coffee controversy to go away, the techy asked him to go before staff to discuss the dangers of having drinks around computers — to which Swanson agreed.

At one point Swanson pled his case to the make-believe techy, saying, “I’m just still in shock. I’ve never had that happen before, and I’m surprised the coffee did that much damage. The stupid top didn’t even come off of the cup.”

On Friday Swanson put two and six together and figured out Cusack was the culprit.

FishbowlDC is collecting the best in newsroom pranks. Who does them? We’re all ears. Write us at: fishbowldc@mediabistro.com.

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