Quotes of the Day

A writer’s philosophy

“One of those days when I didn’t let the failure to write something really good keep me from writing anything at all. Slim victory, indeed.” — WaPo Book World Editor Ron Charles.

Tschida senses demon in his apartment

“Hello exorcist: attic noise wakes dog/ me. NO rodents. Stereo comes on 3 times middle of night. Come home tv blaring! WHAT’S GOIN ON?” — ABC7′s Stephen Tschida. This epitomizes why he was nominated for Drama King in our Summer Superlatives contest. We’re giving you a sage smudge stick to waft around your apartment.

Deep and Dirty Thoughts with WaPo‘s Gene Weingarten: “Profound Thought, by a friend who for some reason wishes anonymity: Bet no one could pick his/her own butthole out of a lineup.” (We’re not looking for art for this item.)

A note about Human Events Editor and Washington’s “The Situation” Jason Mattera: “Ha ha! @JasonMattera missed a book signing at valuesvotersummit.org because he was ‘looking at all the conservative honeys!’”

Separated at Birth Gone Wrong

Here we have an example of a wayward (but delightful) submission: MSNBC’s Ed Schultz and Fred Flintstone. (h/t Larry Kelly)

Thoughtful journo gives award to Jehovahs

“I never invite them in but I’ve got to give the persistence award to the Capitol Hill Jehovah’s Witnesses.” — Albuquerque Journal‘s Washington Bureau Chief Michael Coleman.

Drama Queen dreads iPhone

“I’m sorta dreading the iphone arrival. Spending quality time with my BB now.” — TWT‘s Senior Opinion Writer Emily Miller.

Quotes of the Day

Beauty and the Guido: “Colorado’s rocked so far! At the Steamboat Institute now and hung out with @michellemalkin yesterday.” — Washington’s version of “The Situation” Jason Mattera, Editor of Human Events, in a Friday tweet with the accompanying photograph. We prefer Mattera’s usual wife beater tank to this shapeless snow-patterned purplish T. It looks like he found the elusive Michael Stars – Grimace collection. They tried it once in the mid-90′s but never spoke of it again.

Media elitism

“I go to Whole Foods, other people go to Walmart. There’s a difference.” — The Daily Caller media writer Matt Lewis on media elitism and what it means on CNN’s “Reliable Sources” on Sunday in response to Texas GOP Gov. and presidential hopeful Rick Perry getting “pounded by the press.” Lewis remarked that this cultural bias is even more prevalent than a liberal bias. Later he opined that President Obama going to “hoity-toity” Martha’s Vineyard doesn’t make for good optics.

Astute observation

“CONNOISSEURS of Sunday-morning TV noticed that ‘This Week’ today revived the more urgent, David Brinkley-era opening music.” — Politico‘s Mike Allen in a weekend Playbook observation.

What is not journalism

“How sad that campaign ‘journalism’ has now devolved into, Is so-and-so going to run?? #thatsnotjournalism” — Media Matters‘ Eric Boehlert in a weekend tweet.

And this…

“This is par for the course for Politico. I brought this up on another story and they said they had it first but were just waiting to ‘report out the details.’ Politico, waiting to break news?” — Anonymous Tipster in response to our story, “Politico Behaves Unprofessionally.”

Hairless in D.C.

“There’s a laser hair removal Groupon for the Washington area twice a week, at least. At this rate, #DC should be hairless by 2013.” WaPo Express News Editor Sara Schwartz in a weekend tweet.

Future weatherman

“It’s raining it’s ass off in suburban MD/DC… yeesh!” — Washington Business Journal designer Tim Wong in a Sunday tweet.

En route to Mongolia

“You’ll next hear from us from Ulan Bator, something pooler never thought he’d have the chance to say just a few weeks ago.” — LAT‘s Mike Memoli in a Sunday night VPOTUS Pool Report from China. Ulan Bator is the capital of Mongolia.

Journo Love

“Whole lotta Twitter love for @SavannahGuthrie’s first time filling in on @MeetThePress today.” — NYT Brian Stelter in a Sunday tweet.

Where does Bret Baier shop?

A follower asks FNC’s Bret Baier: “Where do you purchase majority of your shirts/ties from? Good looking combos.” Baier replied, “Most are Brooks Brothers.”

Arianna tweaks Weiner

“And on the pretty geeky side of the news ledger, it was announced that ‘retweet’ and ‘sexting’ have been added to the Oxford English Dictionary. No word on whether @RepWeiner feels validated.” – HuffPost/AOL Editor-in-Chief Arianna Huffington in her “Sunday Roundup.”

Seeing the glass half full…

“So the only good thing about waiting 20 minutes for a train is that I finally got to read about Kim kardashian’s over the top wedding.” — Netcentric editor and writer Elizabeth Brotherton in a weekend tweet. She was formerly an HOH writer for Roll Call.

The media critic

“Peggy Noonan’s wrong that Obama doesn’t have a solid base of people who ‘love’ him. Cheap shot w no data to back up” — NBC’s Domenico Montanaro in a Sunday tweet on WSJ Columnist Peggy Noonan, who appeared on NBC’s “MTP” on Sunday.

Quotes of the Day

Introductions…

“And please say hello to Michele Bachmann’s running mate Chuy.” — E!’s Chelsea Handler on her program Monday night when introducing her miniature sidekick Chuy Bravo.

Unnecessary Tweet of the Day

“Seriously, how did I get a mosquito bite on the bottom of my foot????” — TBD‘s Jeremy Binckes in a Monday tweet. Ladies and gentlemen, Binckes is a first-time offender in this category.

The Anticipator

“So far this is one of those town halls where I expect an audience member to use their question to compliment POTUS on his looks.” — The Hill‘s White House Correspondent Sam Youngman in a Monday tweet referring to President Obama‘s trip to Minnesota.

Journo boasts sexy physique

“Gonna hit the gym. I may even rock the wife beater. Because I can.” — Human Events‘ Jason Mattera in a Monday tweet. Until recently Mattera didn’t know the tank tops he wore were called “wife beaters.” You learn something new everyday, right?

Fried butter aftermath

“For the record, that butter on a stick thing was vile.” — ABC News Senior White House Correspondent Jake Tapper in a Monday tweet. Tapper spent last week in Iowa.

Journo love

“Talking Iowa on MSNBC in the 3 pm hour — or as we call it in the know, the ‘winner’s hour.’” — Slate’s Dave Weigel in a Monday tweet. He was referring to his pal, WaPo liberal blogger and lead Boybander Ezra Klein, who is filling in for MSNBC’s Martin Bashir this week in the 3 p.m. slot. (Tune in for our live-tweeting marathons of Klein’s appearances all week long by following us at @FishbowlDC.)

From the Road

“Thanks to those who recommended Centro last night for dinner in Des Moines, especially @bigjohnrc and @davidmdrucker. Delicious pork chops!” — Roll Call‘s Shira Toeplitz in a Tuesday morning tweet.

Summer Superlative winner pooh-poohs victory

“Thanks @fishbowldc! I wish I could say I was out celebrating, but it’s August and thus no open bars, so I’m at home on the couch. #bigbarfly” — The Washington Examiner‘s Nikki Schwab in a Monday reaction tweet to winning Biggest Open Barfly.

The Fashion Consultant

“Obama, tieless and in shirtsleeves, is looking pretty campaign-y at his town hall in Minnesota.” — Julian Hattem, D.C. correspondent for the Yomiuri Shimbun, a Japanese daily, in a Monday tweet.

Although she’s mysteriously MIA, Ana Marie Cox still managed to win the Most Scandalous category of FishbowlDC’s Summer Superlatives competition. Rivaled only by the Daily Caller’s David Martosko, Cox pulled in an impressive 37.72% of the vote, edging out Martsoko and his rap sheet who earned only 28.74% of your votes.

It was a campaign promise that pushed Emily Miller ahead of Chris Matthews for glory in the Biggest Drama Queen category.  She snagged 48.96% of the vote after pledging to tweet a photo of herself wearing a Jason Mattera-style wife beater and rhinestone-studded tiara if Fishbowl crowned her the winner.  To help Miller make good on her promise, we purchased the tiara this weekend (we’re not kidding).  *Stay tuned for the photo.

CNN’s Candy Crowley had no problem taking the title of Most Trusted with 42.33% of the vote.  While the Biggest Open Bar Fly category went to the Examiner’s Nikki Schwab who beat out Brendan Kownacki by only 4 votes for the distinguished honor.

Congrats to Cox, Miller, Crowley and Schwab!

From stage-five freak outs and Twitter rants to bizarre YouTube videos and on-air feuds, the finalists for our next category are more theatrical than that gay kid on “Glee.”  But which one of our nominees deserves to wear the cubic zirconia-crusted crown as this year’s Biggest Drama Queen or King?

The nominees are…Emily Miller from the Washington Times, MSNBC’s Chris Matthews, Human Events’ Jason Mattera and WJLA’s Stephen Tschida for his performance as Amtrak passenger 1 in “Cold and Alone: The Stephen Tschida Story.”

Quotes of the Day

Juiceboxer Chris Hayes bears a resemblance to Harry Potter

A travel writer chills out in Maine

“Chilly, rainy day in Maine = guilt-free afternoon nap *sigh*” — Travel blogger and Poshbrood site creator Elizabeth Thorp in a weekend Facebook update.

One definition of Hell…

“Hell is not other people. Hell is having to listen to recordings of your own ditzy-sounding voice interviewing other people.” — Slate‘s Noreen Malone in a weekend tweet. Her work has appeared in The Atlantic, TNR, and the American Prospect.

The Critic takes swipe at Politico

“In otherwise good piece, why does Politico quote unnamed Dems and Repubs trashing other party on downgrade? Plenty are willing on the record.” — The Daily Beast Washington Bureau Chief Howard Kurtz in a weekend Facebook update.

Bardella’s widely varying movie tastes

“Seeing Harry Potter…” wrote The Daily Caller Spokesman Kurt Bardella in a weekend Facebook update. He also wrote, “Watching The Godfather on AMC’s Mob Week.”

Editor heads to pool hall

“Just made a bet at a biker pool hall. Not sure how I ended up at a biker pool hall, but when in a biker bar, do as the bikers do.” — Reason Magazine Associate Editor Mike Riggs in a weekend tweet.

Angry journo gets something off chest

“Hello, jerk store? I found your missing products. They all took jobs as Metrobus drivers. (@unsuckdcmetro)” — WCP‘s Benjamin Freed in a weekend tweet.

Scribe endures a little weekend exercise

“Even more than hangover durations (shockingly enough), 80 miles on the bike now best way to realize you’re not 23 anymore. #everythinghurts” — Politico‘s Patrick Gavin in a weekend tweet.

Journo writes love note to tourists

“Dear tourists, wite booty shorts + torrential downpours = your jonx on display. Wear underdrawers. Love, DC” – Roll Call‘s John Stanton in a weekend tweet.

He did what?

“Just reorganized my ties. You literally cannot have enough ties.” — NJ “The Hotline’s” Chris Peleo-Lazar in a weekend tweet. This came within a hair’s breadth of making “Unnecessary Tweet of the Day” but…it is Washington, ties are prevalent, especially ugly ones, and this is a first-time offense for Peleo-Lazar.

Washington’s “The Situation” on C-SPAN

“I’ll be on C-SPAN’s ‘Washington Journal’ Monday morning from 8 to 8:30 am. Tune in! Start your day off by looking at my mug ” — Human Events‘ Jason Mattera in a weekend tweet.

Human Events Editor Jason Mattera has a unique way of dealing with health ailments. “I feel very ghetto right now: I’m icing down my leg with a package of frozen chicken,” he wrote on Twitter Wednesday.

He explained to FishbowlDC that he pulled a muscle in his leg playing softball. “So I iced it down with the only thing in my freezer – a package of frozen chicken,” he wrote to us by email. “And I did this all without wearing a wife beater;)”

As some may know, Mattera has a penchant for wearing wife beater tanks.

We know we compare his looks to “The Situation” and make fun of him for wearing wife beater tanks, but there’s much to admire about the interview that Human Events Editor Jason Mattera did on Monday with BigGovernment’s Andrew Breitbart.

1. Street interviews are very chic. He conducted this one at 11 p.m. in Manhattan outside an old Irish pub. “We were outside on W48 between 5th and 6th,” Mattera informed. “I had just wrapped up my interview with Ann Coulter at AJ Maxwell’s Restaurant and Steakhouse when we bumped into Andrew and decided to do an impromptu interview.”

2. Though clearly a member of the Breitbart Fan Club, the editor got the controversial figure to open up about allegedly hijacking Rep. Anthony Weiner‘s (D-N.Y.) presser earlier in the day. In short, Breitbart explained, there was an outcry for him by journalists to take to the podium and answer questions.

3. In the interview, Breitbart comes off a bit like a whiny victim. Mattera is a keen interviewer in that he just lets him loose to express himself without interruption.

Watch the interview here.

Human Events has written a peculiar invitation for an event this week.

They write: “Next week, please join Jason Mattera, Human Events editor, and Washington Times Examiner reporter and New York Times bestselling author, David Freddoso for a 60-minute live event.”

Mattera is, of course, Human Events Editor and Washington’s answer to “The Situation.” Freddoso works for the Washington Examiner. We’re sure that’s what Editor Stephen Smith is still calling it these days. The event is on May 18. If you fill out this order form, they’ll call you around 2 p.m. for the live event called the “TeleForum Series.”

Ever wanted to meet The Situation all dolled up in conservative clothing?

Well, keep your shirts on. Now you can. He’s Human Events Editor Jason Mattera who comes out today with a video that is sure to make you wonder why MTV isn’t firing Mike Sorrentino and hiring this guy to get on TV with Snooki to flex his guns, make large pasta dinners and coif his hair into a style so absurd that we don’t know what to say, except, watch. He pulls a “Daily Show” maneuver by “interviewing” Facebook Co-founder Mark Zuckerberg on a variety of things, one of which is whether “Zuck” will give the GOP equal time and host a Town Hall with the Republican nominee as well as President Obama. Let’s just say it’s not going to win him a Peabody.

From the Observation Deck:

Mattera’s shocking question leaves us gasping for air: “You must know you’re like an uber dork, right?” Mattera asks.

Bathroom break? In the middle of the interview, Mattera gets up to go “hit the john.” When he returns, he snaps at Zuckerberg, saying, “You timed me?”

Run for cover. The worst part comes when Mattera asks about his love life. “Being a billionaire has probably helped your love life. After all, you are a very strange individual,” he says. Zuckerberg’s comment involves his roommates. Mattera shudders, cover his eyes and says, “TMI dude!”

Watch the awkwardness here.