“This headline writer should get a bonus.” — WaPo’s Karen Tumulty of a headline this week in LAT.

WTF?

“Every time I work outside I’m reminded that mosquitos [sic]:Kevin::Kevin:chicken fried steak. And bug spray must be like cream gravy or something because it has no effect.” — Townhall Managing Editor Kevin Glass, who apparently uses bug spray on his steak.

Uh oh.

“Dear God, glitch in condo quest! Keep fingers crossed, trying to work things out. Kids I can’t take another disappointment…” — ABC7′s Stephen Tschida, who has been through the wringer with his search for a condo.

Wrap your head around this…

“Carol Burnett to receive Mark Twain Prize for American Humor.” — WaPo Book World Editor Ron Charles.

“I award @RonCharles the Carol Burnett Prize for American Humor.” — Reuters‘ Jack Shafer.

Bureau Chief gets touch of road rage 

“Oh my god, this traffic is soul crushing. …I don’t know how people drive to work. I’d murder all the things if I had to do this.” — BuzzFeed Bureau Chief John Stanton on Tuesday evening.

WTF Part II

“So, I know I’ve been going on all day about graduations, but something crazy just happened on FB, and I had to immediately defriend someone. Am I crazy for this? When is it ever really appropriate to hit someone with a ‘yo you didnt call me?’ if y’all don’t really talk?” — WaPo Express‘ Clinton Yates. First off, yes, Yates, you’re crazy for this. Dear Readers, we tried in vain to get the complete story out of him last night as to what happened here, but failed miserably. Either his story sucks or we don’t get it. We’re willing to concede both. But you’ve been warned. Go “trolling” in the vicinity of Yates on social media and you could be defriended, blocked, etc…

Learning the lingo 

“I also learned that ‘Katie Holmes’ Knee Vagina?’ is an actual headline.” — Jazz Shaw, weekend editor at Hot Air.

Katie Holmes photo credit: TMZ

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

SANFORD MEDIA OBSESSION CONCLUDES: “Sanford campaign takes a bigger class picture.” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

“Love him or hate him, he’s one hell of a grassroots campaigner” — MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough on the newly reelected Rep. Mark Sanford (R-S.C.). Scarborough, later chatting with Sen. Lindsay Graham (R-S.C.), promised to take Sanford to dinner when he got to town.

Meanwhile, MSNBC’s Twitter feed appears to hold back on the praise. “In his victory speech last night, Mark Sanford described himself as ‘one imperfect man.’ No argument there!”

Editor-in-Chief calls himself an “idiot”

“As of today, @wcp has gone 0 days without a workplace injury: I just cut my thumb on packing tape dispenser. Because I’m an idiot.” — WCP Editor-in-Chief Mike Madden.

Oh no he didn’t.

“You know who is fat? Hillary.” — Breitbart editor John Nolte.

Father of the Year?

“Headed home from Flint, MI after attending daughter’s wedding shower and niece’s lacrosse game as well as watching #Wings with dad. #love.” — National Journal national reporter Ron Fournier.

Dipshit alert or rightful observer?

“For perspective: Mark Sanford cheated on his wife. Ted Kennedy killed a lady.” — Fox News Contributor and RedState‘s Erick Erickson. The Nation’s Washington reporter George Zornick didn’t seem to enjoy any of Erickson’s commentary last night. He wrote, “There really is no polite way to say this: Erick Erickson is a mendacious dipshit.”

Other reactions to Sanford’s win…

“Sanford wins. Women lose.” — CNN Contributor and Democratic pundit Donna Brazile.

“Hide your wife, Mark Sanford’s coming back to town.” — Media Matters fellow Oliver Willis.

“Well, I’m pleased that Mark Sanford won. Hopefully, he will bring pigs to the House floor soon.” — Liz Mair, formerly RNC online communications director and GOProud Advisory Board member.

Internal BuzzFeed is “weird place”

“The Buzzfeed reply-all office email chain is a weird place.” — BuzzFeed‘s Kate Nocera.

The Media Critic

“Aside from how I feel about the content, Megyn Kelly at 10 would be a better show than Greta Van Susteren is. almost anything would be.” — Media Matters fellow and professional Fox News hater Oliver Willis. Asked why, he replied, “Because it’s a boring snoozefest.” Better hope Camp Gretawire doesn’t see this.

Dannia Hakki, a publicist who also handles her dog’s pr, lands her pooch on Popville. Her name is QueenTinzy. Seriously. And yes, QueenTinzy has been involuntarily entered into DogBowl2013. See here.

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

On Twitter Wednesday Capehart wrote, “Great, the (212) 988-……phone stalker has rediscovered my number.” Some Capehart followers encouraged him to release the number so his fan club can retaliate. “I say u tweet the whole phone number and let us at him/her!! #fightfirewithfire,” wrote Tiffany, clearly on Team Capehart.

When asked about it, he explained to FishbowlDC, “Oh it’s some dame with a delightfully thick New Yawk accent who has been calling me (and others, including Karen Tumulty) for years. She runs out the voicemail with either Rush Limbaugh’s radio show or her ranting about how I’m finished, how I’m a black bigot who hates white people, or, how I hate women but sleep with my mother. Yeah, she’s all charm. “

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Reflection on WHCD’s past

“You know you are old if you can remember when the White House Correspondents Dinner was just a dinner in a hotel basement.” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

A polite and impolite view of Politico‘s Leibo piece

“Not a reflexive @politico hater by any means but the Allen/Vandehei piece on @MarkLeibovich sure bears out his thesis of DC’s awfulness.” — The Hill‘s Associate Editor Niall Stanage. Then there’s Michael Cohen, a columnist for The Guardian, who wasn’t so kind. He wrote, “Dear Washington DC: This article is kind of the reason people don’t like you.” Read the Politico piece here.

Number of Weiner jokes made National Journal‘s Political Pursuit game last night at the Newseum: At least 2. One was made by an unknown member of the audience; the other by WaPo‘s Chris Cillizza, who was on the winning team of journliasts that included WaPo‘s Paul Kane, NYT‘s Carl Hulse, Roll Call‘s Shira Toeplitz and The Cook Report’s Amy Walter. More on the event later…

And now a note from our Spiritual Counselor Sophia Nelson, of theGrio.com and Essence: “We are spiritual beings having an earthly experience. Protect your spirit. Feed your spirit. Guard your spirit. Bless your spirit.”

If you can’t beat ‘em, leave the country

“Out of the city and country for the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. Totally unplanned. Tears of unbridled joy. Alhamdullilah.” — Washington freelancer Sam Knight, who writes for Salon and Washington Monthly.

NPR has rep to uphold

“*sigh* If I had a nickel for every time I’ve thought this… ” –NPR’s Audie Cornish, host of “All Things Considered” in response to this: “@GeeDee215: okay. i’mma stop. This is NPR, etc.”

Yeah, riiiight: “It’s definitely smaller this year.” — SKDknickerbocker’s Doug Thornell on this year’s Garden Brunch hosted by Tammy Haddad, SKD’s Hilary Rosen and others.

AnonymASS Tipster of the Week: “Hey Peter Ogburn. While you humiliate some person who no one knows, same question can be asked of you: who the hell are you? Or who should care about the mostly puerile things you write? Advice? Find something else to do with your life.” Dear ASS: He is Peter Ogburn, THAT’s who. Who are you? Oh, right, the person who is too cowardly to attach your name to your note.

Journo Love

“Follow by the far the funniest @politico: @LucyConstance.” — Politico‘s Alexander Burns.

And finally, a morning Bible lesson from FNC’s Brit Hume‘s wife, Kim Hume: “A sound heart is life to the body, But envy is rottenness to the bones. Proverbs 14:30 (NKJV)”

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Weiner Wisdom

“To reduce what Weiner did to ‘He tweeted his junk’ is to miss the point and plays into his narrative.” — Larry O’Connor of Breitbart.com on ex-Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY).

J-School: “Dear media: “When you rely on named sources, you don’t have to worry if their information proves to be wrong. #Boston Marathon.” — Dan Kennedy, journalism instructor at Northeastern University and a blogger for The Nation.

Major Garrett on playing soccer in Politico-U.S. Soccer charity event

“I played soccer in high school. I was a middling quality defender then. I am a full-time offender to the beauty of the game now, though typically away from public view. For a great cause, I will try to minimize the damage my game does to soccer now.” — CBS Chief White House Correspondent Major Garrett.

Regular Wisdom

“Dear Media: Tomorrow, try decaf.” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

Funny Reporter

“Obama’s remarks are on the podium. Two minutes. Cc @peterogburn” — TIME‘s Zeke Miller cheeky response to this item published Tuesday by Ogburn.

Politico Playbook Publish Time: 6:34 a.m.

In case you missed the news… last night about BuzzFeed getting screwed out of a table at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner see what their Plan B is here. And let’s just go ahead and say, no, Fox News’s Ed Henry. You’re not invited.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

AUNTIE OF THE CENTURY: “This is what 100 years old looks like on my amazing great aunt, Helen Forbrich. Happy birthday, Auntie Helen!” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

Baier’s son to get heart tests

“Good morning! Paul’s getting some tests on his heart this morning at @childrenshealth & he’s into “Wreck it Ralph”!” — FNC’s Bret Baier with accompanying photograph.

Reporter hates talking points requests 

“Least fav tweets are pols asking followers to retweet the talking points they’ve already tweeted 1,000 times before.” — CQ Roll Call White House reporter Steven Dennis.

This is how rumors get started

“Norm Coleman on CNN right now…Wonder if Zucker is trying him out as a regular contributor? Talking with Hilary Rosen about #Oscars.” — Jennifer Moire, public affairs and media consultant.

A boiling hot idea for next year’s Oscars

“Next year they should just have Satan host the Oscars.” — Politico‘s Ben White.

Journos face rough start to week

“Yep, please start my Monday morning with construction knocking out the water pipes … Again.” — Politico‘s Seung Min Kim.

“Apparently I slept on a mouse. True, it was a stuffed toy mouse, but the sight still jolted me as I got out of bed. #helloMonday” — Metro Weekly‘s Randy Shulman.

Politico Playbook Publish Time: 9:29 a.m.

Editor feels pulled in different directions…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Burying the lead

“Magistrate in Pistorius case really knows how to bury the lead. He’s been reading back the case for more than 1/2 hr now w/o ruling on bail.” — Jon Belmont, AP Radio News.

Travel Bitches

“Nothing like starting off the day with a 4 am wake up for a 6 am flight.” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

“Instead of “quiet car” Amtrak should have one where everyone who screams on their phones all the way from DC to NY sits together.” — MSNBC “Daily Rundown” Executive Producer Brooke Brower.

“Longest Circulator ride of. My. Life.” — MetroWeekly‘s Justin Snow.

“Seatmate warns: ‘I didn’t sleep last night, so I may doze on your shoulder.’ #StrangerDanger” — Erica Elliot, the avid travel tweeter who is also the Communications Director for the Major Whip of the House, Kevin McCarthy.

Ouch and more ouch!

“@ErikWemple Looking forward to your next piece when you ask the Obama campaign which Politico and WaPo stories helped them the most.” — The Daily Caller‘s Alex Pappas to WaPo‘s Erik Wemple for this story, in which he takes Breitbart.com and The Daily Caller and lumps them together into a story on shoddy conservative media reporting. Shockingly (and yes, we’re being sarcastic), no one from either publication would speak to the Erik Wemple Blog for his story. Before he began writing for WaPo, Wemple indicated that he would not be covering WaPo. He has broken this declaration a few times, but has mostly stuck with it.

Politico Playbook Publish Time: 9:39 a.m.

New D.C. slang: “the metch” 

“Today in IMing: a friend refers to Metro as ‘the metch’ which is not shorter than ‘metro’ but is more fun to say I guess.” — TPM‘s Evan McMorris-Santoro.

Moving woes

“It was a huge mistake to think that I could install my internet by myself.” — BuzzFeed‘s Rosie Gray, who recently moved to Washington from New York.

Bon Voyage!

“Thank you so much everyone for your kind notes. Psyched to head to Beijing but sad to be leaving such amazing friends & colleagues in DC.” — WaPo‘s Felicia Sonmez. We inquired what Sonmez was up to in Bejing. She replied, “Today is my last day at the Post. I am planning to move to Beijing in the next few months and study Chinese, and then find a reporting job there.” All the best to Sonmez on her new adventure.

Self-Appointed Media Critics

• “Local news doing a fabulous job with storm coverage. Too bad they suck at covering most everything else.” — Conservative radio host and gun enthusiast Dana Loesch.

• “Every year National Journal’s ratings of conservatives and liberals come out I’m reminded of just how stupid National Journal can be.” — FNC and RedState‘s Erick Erickson.

Senate gets new rail to protect clock from reporters chasing senators (a joke, sort of, of course)…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

“No White House photos from family meetings. But the family of Emilie Parker, who was 6, released this on their own.” — Paul Brandus of West Wing Reports.

TIPS FROM THE POOL, INTO THE DEEP END: “Deep female sobs were heard from several sections of the audience, as the president started to read the names of the teachers who were killed at Sandy Hook Elementary school. …The president is speaking without a teleprompter and he carried his remarks in a dark folder. ” — A White House Pool Report by AFP’s Stephen Collinson on President Obama‘s speech in Newtown, Conn. last night.

Confessional: “I keep having this one horrible thought: I am lying when I tell my children there’s no such thing as monsters.” — ABC News Senior White House Correspondent Jake Tapper in starkly shifting roles over the weekend between reporter and private citizen. He received a lot of praise but some complaints.

Journo pushes gun control laws

“If we as a nation got serious about keeping guns away from the mentally disturbed, Louie Gohmert *would* have reason to be concerned.” — Mother Jones Engagement Editor and former Survivor: Baghdad contestant Adam Weinstein on Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas), who went on Fox News Sunday this weekend and announced that more guns are the answer to mass killings such as the one at Sandy Hook.

A mayor, former White House COS changes his mind on guns

“President Clinton and I fought to pass the assault weapons ban. It’s time to renew and strengthen it. An easy vote.” — Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel. But wait, The New Yorker‘s Ryan Lizza points out the mayor’s incredible hypocrisy…Read here.

And an editor addresses what evil is not…

“Evil has nothing to do with Autism, Asperger’s, or being goth.” — CNN Contributor and Breitbart.com‘s Dana Loesch.

A moment of tweeting silence?

“I won’t be tweeting during President’s remarks. I think we should all listen carefully.” — Politico‘s Roger Simon.

Whoa, what?! “Friend of mine joined NRA this morning. Sleeper mole trying to change org from inside. Will they support more limitations and licensing?” — Washingtonian Publisher Cathy Merrill Williams.

A compliment for CNN: “CNN is doing a segment on comfort dogs being brought to Newtown to help people cope. It’s actually comforting just watching them on TV.” — HuffPost‘s Sam Stein.

Journalistic outrage

“Yesterday’s orgy of erroneous & at times repulsively awful reporting on #Newtown should be a wakeup call for journalists everywhere.” — Roll Call White House reporter Steven Dennis.

“You see journalists saying ‘this is so awful, why does this keep happening’ while rabidly posting links to the killer’s social media.” — Justin Green, editor of David Frum’s blog.

“Not the best day for my trade.” — TIME White House correspondent Michael Scherer with a link to a story on outlets that botched the Connecticut shooting story.

Congratulations to… FNC’s Greta Van Susteren and hubby John Coale on 33 years of marriage. They celebrated on Sunday.

TV journo planned to spend weekend in prayer… continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

“He’ll be insufferable now.” — MSNBC “Morning Joe” Contributor Mike Barnicle reacting to TIME‘s Mark Halperin role in “Game Change” winning four Emmys last night. Halperin wrote the 2010 book that later became a movie with New York magazine’s John Heilemann.

Luke says Dad is among the ghosts

“.@brainsalsa Great shot. He’s there with the ghosts Bruce mentions.” — NBC’s Luke Russert, in reference to a picture from a Bruce Springsteen concert. After Salsa wrote and told him he’s in the front row of a Springsteen concert and misses Luke’s dad “a ton,” Luke tells his new acquaintance that Tim Russert is among the ghosts. Um, creepy?

Arianna says buon giorno to HuffPost Italy 

“Arrived in Rome for the launch of L’Huffington Post Italia.” — AOL-HuffPost Editor-in-Chief Arianna Huffington.

Important Q’s to Ponder: “Why am I sitting in traffic in LA at 7:30 on a Saturday? Don’t people have somewhere to be already?” — Politico‘s Ginger Gibson.

Scribe notices peculiar blend of hotel guests

“Interesting vibe in my hotel. 3 conventions going on: funeral directors, financial planners, Rwandans” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

Dowd dismisses Stuart Stevens

“You get the sense that the strategist considers himself cooler than the candidate, that he’s too hip to walk through fire for Mitt and that he lacks confidence that Romney could be a better campaigner. He treats Mitt like a cardboard cutout, never asking him to risk anything or pushing him to be big, bold and inspirational.” — NYT Columnist Maureen Dowd in reference to Mitt Romney‘s Campaign Strategist Stuart Stevens in her Sunday column.

Reporters get shaft on Romney plane

“In the 2 hours the press was off Romney plane in SD, a new curtain has been installed to separate the reporters from the staff section.” — NBC News’ Garrett Haake.

Ana Marie unveils her weekend plans

“Boyfriend has mysterious journey planned for bday: ‘wear comfortable clothes, bring toiletries, and something nice for later.’” — The Guardian‘s Ana Marie Cox.

Speaking of the weekend…

“Rihanna, thanks for being the song in my head. Cheers to the freakin’ weekend… I drink to that, yeahh yeahhh.” — Politico Publicist Olivia Petersen.

Preacher Sophia gets prayed up  

“Boy do I have a whole LOT to say-God is doing some stuff in and for me. It’s kinda scary, crazy, wonderful. When I get back 2 VA will share!” — Essence and theGrio.com columnist Sophia Nelson.

Self-appointed media critic

“This MTP roundtable is really good. @JoeNBC vs.Bay Buchanan is exquisite.” — Politico Capitol Hill reporter Jake Sherman temporarily parts with his Phish obsession to watch MTP.

Noteworthy: AP‘s Kasie Hunt appeared on the Fox News Sunday panel for the first time this weekend.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

BOSOM BUDDIES: If they do nothing else, conventions bond people together in unfathomable ways. The Daily Caller Editor-in-Chief Tucker Carlson poses with FishbowlDC’s Peter Ogburn, also producer of The Bill Press Show. This makes up for all the times Carlson told Ogburn to go f&%k himself.

A follower to Howard Stern: “Thank you for not tweeting about politics!!!” Howard Stern: “I’ll stick to fart jokes.”

A question to end all questions: ‘How are you?’

“I then headed down the hall for a brief separate interview with [Stephanie] Cutter, whom I’ve known for years, going back to when she was John Kerry’s spokeswoman. ‘How are you?’ I asked. ‘Are we on the record?’ she replied. — NYT Magazine’s Mark Leibovich in a first person account of covering presidential campaigns and the joylessness of the current campaign season. Read the full story and see the frighteningly ugly graphics of the candidates here.

STOP THE PRESSES! Weigel gets rubdown in HuffPost Oasis

“OH outside HuffPost Oasis: ‘Somebody spilled coconut water all over my shoe!’” — Slate‘s Dave Weigel, who quickly added, “Not to mock the HuffPost Oasis. I partook of a free massage there.” Not surprisingly, an obviously mature follower asked, “Geez dude, right there in the open? Was there a happy ending?”

Cheap motels here we come! Is David Corn here?

“A cheap motel in Charlotte…just how I want to spend my holiday weekend. Welcome to the DNC!” — Co-founder and Exec. Director of GOProud Jimmy LaSalvia. (Mother Jones Washington Bureau Chief David Corn stayed at what he dubbed Motel Hell — a.k.a. Days in Busch Gardens, Fla. — until he could stand it no more and shacked up in a downtown condo belonging to a fellow writer who offered him better accommodations on Twitter during the GOP Convention in Tampa. Pictured here: Corn with Victoria White in her living room.

Points for effort? “Dead 460-word lede that took me five hours to write just cut down to 100 words that I could have written in 30 mins. Much better, but geez.” — WaPo Book World Editor Ron Charles.

Exploding pens! The epidemic continues…

“Anyone know what makes pens decide to leak? I’ve had three go rogue on the inside of my purse in the last two days. Ink everywhere.” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty. Last week PBS’s Gwen Ifill dealt with an exploding pen just before going on air.

AMAZING FEATS: Harwood’s garage door opener works

“Frontiers of technology: turns out that garage door opener, even after having been slathered w/cheese grits (don’t ask) still gets job done” — CNBC and NYT‘s John Harwood.

WTF? Breitbart.com reporter prematurely accuses media of racism

“MSM did absurd strip club stories at RNC. So if they don’t do same at DNC…why?!? Racist MSM have smthng against ethnic DNC strippers?” — In an act of absolute stellar reporting, Breitbart.com‘s Tony Lee, formerly of Human Events, accuses “MSM” of racist reporting at the Democratic National Convention before it even begins. WWBD? Not this.

Cab complaint in Charlotte

“Advice to all in #Charlotte: Avoid the Orange Cab company. An hour late for pickup. Told four times cab was ‘five minutes’ away.” — The Weekly Standard Senior Writer Stephen Hayes.

Journo laments latest fashion trends

“So glad to see that this year’s dominant style will be high waists and short skirts, two things which look just darling on a 6’2 woman.” — The Atlantic‘s Megan McArdle.

Old School Baier Vomit

“Heading to see my wife and kids- hopping a plane back to dc and then coming back sunday-haven’t see the boys in 10 days-need a day w the fam.” — FNC’s Bret Baier. He adds, “I am loving life this morning – these guys woke me up at 630a.” And there you have his adorable sons — both with trademark Bret Baier wavy chestnut hair — in perfectly matched outfits.

Cool guy talk

“Guys, it’s Twitter. It’s happening. It’s not going to change. Ride the wave, brah.” — Politico‘s Dylan Byers getting his Twitter on.

And speaking of cool, a reporter goes Eastwooding at the vet

“Keeping myself occupied waiting at the vet on a rainy Sunday night #eastwooding” — Politico‘s Dan Berman.

Boingo hot spot anyone?

“The two most evil, rancid, hateful words in the English language for work travelers: Boingo Hotspot” — Politico‘s Ben White. And from the Dept. of Bragiculture, White (a FishbowlDC fave but we have to rip on him for this) retweets a follower complimenting him: “Your tweets have been so… compelling & educative for me.” He replies, “So kind! My pleasure.”

Modern Dating: Journo accidentally asks out flight attendant

“Flight attendant just moved to DC,doesn’t know anyone. Wanted to say we could go out as friends; may have accidentally asked her out. Awkward.” — Mother Jones‘ Nick Baumann.

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

FishbowlDC took a look at some of the LIVE! offerings to separate the pros from the piglets.

Politico has done a solid job thus far with its video coverage. Each morning at 7:30 a.m. White House Correspondent Mike Allen and Executive Editor Jim VandeHei begin with a look at the day ahead. An hour later Politico partners with the Tampa Bay Times for a “Playbook Breakfast” featuring high-profile guests such as Liz Cheney, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell and Karl Rove. Live streaming video continues throughout the day with coverage and analysis provided by Politico reporters and other media types. Convention speeches are also streamed in the evening. Finding Politico‘s video coverage is easy. A large graphic link sits at the top of the homepage. Shockingly, this detail escaped many other publications, which essentially put their video streams in holes then covered them in dirt. One upside of viewing Politico‘s live videos is VandeHei try to intimidate his reporters with scare tactics. Wait, isn’t that Politico Pro‘s Tim Grieve‘s job? “You said you’d have two scoops for us,” VandeHei said to Jake Sherman at the start of one segment. “It’s your birthday!” VandeHei said at one point to another reporter. “We’re going to let you work until midnight!” Only minor audio issues in the stream have ensued.

WaPo‘s live coverage, meanwhile, is mediocre at best, if you can manage to stay awake to actually experience it. It’s unclear how to even get to a video landing page. From the front page of WaPo‘s website, readers can either scroll down a little to click a small icon labeled “live” which leads to a regularly updated blog on political news and posts live streaming video when there is one. The stream we caught was a breakfast yesterday hosted by WaPo‘s Dan Balz, Chris Cillizza and Karen Tumulty along with Sen. Rob Portman (R-Ohio). Content amounted to a camera that largely zoned in on Portman. The breakfast bore the atmosphere of a cafeteria at a retirement home.

HuffPost Live, the new video venture from HuffPost, has also been streaming segments from the convention. Yesterday the publication’s Editor-in-Chief Arianna Huffington streamed into HuffPost‘s studio via webcam from Tampa to discuss the Republican convention. What’s distracting is how anyone joining by webcam has to do so wearing headphones, often the white ones that come with Apple products. Video is easy to find with HuffPost Live because it has its own website. Production is sharp enough for online video but we can’t escape the feeling that our annoying relatives are trying to Skype with us. Furthermore, because many of the guests are everyday people joining from home, so viewers are often treated to random home phones ringing and out-of-sight dogs panting.

CNN may have the best online video stream (understandable, given that it’s produced by an actual TV network). The cast we caught was a convention chat between CNN’s Wolf Blitzer and Jim Acosta along with liberal commentator Donna Brazile and former White House Press Secretary Ari Fleischer. Unfortunately, we have no idea how to navigate back to any video streaming. We were only able to find this particular one because the exact web address was advertised on CNN’s TV channel. But trying to get there from CNN.com is a no go.

Moving on, other than picture quality, which was generally top notch, The Hill‘s live streaming has been terrible. We checked in on several occasions. Once, the camera was fixated on a man tapping on his phone and doing nothing else, with a 30-second clip of music on loop. Another time, the camera was focused on empty bleachers for an unusually extended period of time. And in a third instance, the audio wasn’t in sync with the video. This morning’s stream was a panel discussion featuring conservative author Jonah Goldberg and The Hill‘s A.B. Stoddard, two capable journos who know their way around TV appearances. I’d tell you who the other person on the panel was, but there was almost zero description of the panel underneath the video. The description that was there only contained the name of the event and the time it started. The camera never moved, or zoomed. It simply sat with a wide shot of the panel. On the plus side, the video stream is easy to find. Like Politico, a graphic link at the top of The Hill‘s homepage takes you there.

Tied with The Hill for terrible video streaming is National Journal. Once again, it’s difficult to find when navigating from the front page. Scroll down and a graphic link is to the right with tiny font lettering that says “full coverage.” Even when you get there, the live stream video isn’t at the top, it’s almost halfway down the page. In National Journal‘s case, the picture quality is good but the camera work is poor. It was only a single stationary camera focused on the speaker (and we can’t tell you who it was when we watched because like The Hill, there was no description underneath the video).

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

From USA TODAY‘s Jackie Kucinich, who writes, “Good to know…”

Travel Taunting: “Shockingly large number of air travel rookies today. Guy from Bloomberg: ‘Do I have to take my laptop out?’” — National Review‘s Jonah Goldberg. Wino Watch: “Dulles bar near gate to Tampa uncorking vino already. Here comes the press!” — Washington Examiner “Washington Secrets” writer Paul Bedard.

Ana off the wagon?

“@ananavarro: In my mathematic formula: Should always pack more shoes than days for a convention. Same holds for bottles of wine.”#approve — The Guardian‘s Ana Marie Cox. Ana Navarro is a Republican pundit for CNN.

Deep Travel Thoughts: “Try to not point out flaws in stupid shit on airplanes right after boarding if you want your flight to take off on time. Or at all.” — House Oversight Committee Chairman Darrell Issa‘s (R-Calif.) Press Sec. Becca Glover Watkins. And from Sen. Orrin Hatch‘s (R-Utah) Comm Dir. and Senior Advisor Antonia Ferrier: “Airports on little sleep is a bad idea.”

“A quad of talent in Tampa.” — NBC Audio OP Steve Mitnick. The photograph includes NBC Correspondents Chuck Todd, Kelly O’Donnell, NBC News Senate Producer Libby Leist and NBC Producer Doug Adams.

Tampa Hair and the fight against humidity

“Getting hair and makeup done for @CNN with @crowleyCNN in an hour. Artists putting up a valiant fight against humidity.” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

“Uh oh forgot my flat iron. There is going to be some serious crazy Zito hair going on in Tampa.” — Pittsburgh Tribune-Review‘s Salena Zito.

Speaking of a good blowdry…

“I can probably put down blowdrying rain-soaked shoes as one of the few things I will not miss about living in this city.” — Former TWT White House reporter Kara Rowland, a gradate student at the London School of Economics.

What could possibly go wrong? “Renting a car for the next two weeks. Haven’t driven in something like 3 years.” — Ashley McCollum, press manager for BuzzFeed.

Tampa-wear: What should she wear?

“Packing for Tampa. Help me out, tweeps: What does one wear to a hurricane?” — BuzzFeed‘s newest scribe Rebecca Berg.

From L to R: Benjy Sarlin, Sara Libby and Evan McMorris-Santoro. “Good morning Team @TPM! #travel buddies.” — Roll Call’s Meredith Shiner.

Hurricane Watch: “Hurricane, meet Hurricane. Speaker Newt ‘I will be the nominee” Gingrich on my plane to Tampa.’” — The Hill‘s Managing Editor Bob Cusack.

Poor Howie! Alone with a bagel.

“The sad sight of Howard Kurtz eating a bagel alone in a Holiday Inn at 7am.” — The Guardian‘s Richard Adams. Meanwhile, Howiella is en route to Tampa. “On a flight to Tampa with @BobCusack and @thehill Editor-in-Chief Hugo Gurdon.#partytime” — The Hill‘s gossip scribe Judy Kurtz (a.k.a. Howiella, Howlma, Howeesha, etc..)

Huh, really?  

“If you are a political reporter, Tampa is the place to be this week. #protip” — Newsweek‘s Eli Lake.

Corn lost, pissed without MSNBC

“And this damn hotel doesn’t have MSNBC. Just Fox and CNN. Figures. We’re blowing the joint this AM.” — Mother Jones D.C. Bureau Chief and MSNBC Contributor David Corn.

WORLDS COLLIDE

“Sitting next to @BretBaier on flight to Tampa. A very nice guy. By the way, live @CNNSitRoom 6PM ET today. He’s not live today.” — CNN’s Wolf Blitzer.

Hallelujah! TBD Twitter account officially sinks. Who cares that it happened two weeks after its death?

Radio host is all ears

“I talk on the radio but most impt thing I do is listen, esp on matters of Race. And if you listen carefully you even hear what’s left unsaid.” — NPR’s Michele Norris.

The admission: “Going on CNN’s ‘Reliable Sources with Howard Kurtz’ this morning to say regrettable things I will certainly try to weasel out of.” — Politico‘s Roger Simon.

Journo needs The Weather Channel

“Seems to be getting windy in Tampa this morning. What’s that about?” — CNBC and NYT‘s John Harwood.

A new airport game: Spot the Reporter

“ON WAY TO TAMPA: 20-something girls near me in airport were briefly playing ‘spot the reporter.’ Guess lack of ‘press’ hat disguised me?” — CNN’s Lisa Desjardins.

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

On Thursday, we began rolling out the results of our Summer Superlatives and today, you get to meet the rest of the winners. Thanks for voting.

Today’s results kicks off with the Best Dressed category. This cage match was between Politico’s Ken Vogel and Kate Nocerra, WaPo’s Jonathan Capehart, RCP’s Erin McPike, and CNN’s Kate Balduan. This contest wasn’t even close. While we had a feeling Capehart would be the clear winner, he was a very distant second to Kate Balduan! Congrats, Kate. Your prize is a $1 gift card to Fashion Bug!

Moving right along, we asked you to name Washington’s Best Writer. Your choices were The Weekly Standard’s Matt Labash, The New Yorker’s Ryan Lizza, NJ’s Major Garrett, NYT’s Mark Leibovich, Ashley Parker and Maureen Dowd, WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty, HuffPost’s Eliot Nelson, and Washingtonian’s Luke Mullins. This one was a close one to call. It was a two-man race between Garrett and Labash, but in the end, Major Garrett came through and was voted the winner. It should be noted that today is Garrett’s birthday.

Which Washington journo is Most In Need of a Salad? We asked you to choose between Politico’s Jonathan Allen and Jonathan Martin, Slate‘s Dave Weigel, HuffPost’s Peter Cherukuri and Jason Linkins, FNC’s Bob Beckel and Bret Baier, and author and former TWTer Rich Miniter. This was another category where it wasn’t even close. The FNC team of Bob Beckel and Bret Baier were the heavy favorites and waddled walked their way to an easy victory.

Next up, we had the category that saw more votes than any other, Sexiest. Your sultry selections were AP‘s Steve Peoples, Atlantic Publisher Justin Smith, Washingtonian‘s Kate Bennett, Real Housewives of D.C.’s sassy stylist Paul Wharton, CNN’s Brianna Keilar, NBC4′s Doug Kammerer and Maynard Institute’s Richard Prince. The winner by a slim, sexy (and consenting) majority was Brianna Keilar.

On the other side of the coin, we have Who is Most In Need of a Makeover? Your choices were CQ Roll Call (the entire publication), The Daily Caller’s Matthew Boyle, TWT’s Stephen Dinan, Publicist Wendy Gordon, DCRTV’s Dave Hughes and Mediaite’s Tommy Christopher. Once again, this was a two-man race between Christopher and Boyle. While Christopher just looks generally disheveled, the overall train wreck that is Matthew Boyle was voted the winner. Congrats, Matt. We hear that Paul Wharton may be available to help turn you into a beautiful swan.

Last, but certainly not least, is the Best On-Air Personality. The heavy-hitters on this list were ABC’s Jake Tapper, The Daily Caller’s Tucker Carlson, MSNBC’s Chuck Todd, CBS’s Bob Schieffer and Nancy Cordes, HuffPost‘s Sam Stein, and WaPo’s Nia-Malika Henderson. At the end of the day, the experience of Schieffer couldn’t keep up with your winner, Jake Tapper!

Congratulations to all of our winners.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Brave TV journo reports on wild dogs

“Story on wild killer dogs. I’m live in their favorite hunting ground. Nah… I’m not nervous. but looking forward to gettin out a here.” — ABC7′s Stephen Tschida.

A reporter’s gratitude for bottomless iced tea

“Thanking Schreiner’s Restaurant in Fond du Lac. they let me camp all afternoon (& gave endless iced tea refills) while I wrote a story.” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

Chuck Todd wants to rename ‘Peeping Tom’

“Saw report on WRC about “peeping Tom” at Ballston mall. Can we call them “Peeping pigs”; “peeping tom” makes me laugh and it shouldn’t.” — NBC Political Director Chuck Todd.

Deck of the Day: “Official fatwa says jihadis may defy Quran to make room for butt bombs.” The story by Daily Caller Executive Editor David Martosko concerns a Muslim cleric who said sodomy, normally prohibited in the Islamic religion, is perfectly acceptable when preparing to place a bomb in one’s ass. In other words, says the story, “gay sex” is okay in the face of jihad.

From the Road

“In a Hawaiian salon with New Kids on the Block blaring, not even at my request. #livinthedream” — TPM‘s Sara Libby.

“Hello, McGrath’s Pub in Harrisburg! The third time I ask a waiter for a glass of water, I expect a glass of water.” — Slate‘s apparently impatient but no less weigelicious Dave Weigel.

Editor’s son proudly eats Chic-fil-A

“Raised him right! Here’s how my son Marcus ordered at CFA today: ‘A bottle of water and some free speech please.’” — Washington Examiner Executive Editor Mark Tapscott.

Baier Vomit

“Good morning-Just landed in DC from LA-those red eyes are a little rough. Home to be with the fam for awhile-then into the office-good trip.” — FNC’s Bret Baier, whose devoted followers were up and ready to respond. Ohio’s Sylvia Levine writes, “When do you sleep?” And horsefly1013 chimes in, “Welcome back. Glad you had a good trip. Most importantly, glad you had a safe landing.”

What puts a huge smile on NBC Luke Russert‘s face? Aside from a solitary dragonfly, talking a few decibels too loudly and filling in for Chuck Todd on “The Daily Rundown,” this: “Huge smile on my face right now, I got an email from the @Nationals asking if I wanted to buy postseason tickets. Awesome. #Natitude” (If anyone missed the spellbinding dragonfly that Luke photographed during a game and tweeted the following day because God forbid we don’t know the profound things Luke witnesses on a daily basis, see at right. In the world of woo woo, the dragonfly symbolizes change and emotional maturity.)

In potentially embarrassing news…“The frequency with which I send @jaketapper emails meant for my brother (Jake) is comical.” — CNN’s Lizzie O’Leary.

Congratulations to… FNC’s Juan Williams on the births of twin granddaughters Wednesday. “Yesterday Pepper and Wesley came into my world,” Williams remarked this morning on Fox & Friends. To which Steve Doocy goofily replied, “Congratulations Grandpappy.”

Peter Ogburn contributed to this report.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

“Getting ready for my new gig at @CNN. Is @wolfblitzer ready for THIS?!?!” — CNN’s newest employee John Berman, who is going to work on CNN’s morning program “Early Start.”

TV anchor shows off necklace

“Wearing today.. Awesome gift from sis. Necklace that doubles as a looking glass.” — NBC Washington’s Angie Goff.

In Seersucker Hell

“At a summer wedding in Georgia. There is seersucker here. Kill me.” — RedState.com Contributor Jeff Emanuel.

Douchey or Doocy?

“Pistachios- smart snack on a NY to DC train? The man next to me seems to think so #AreWeThereYet? #Amtrak” — FNC’s Peter Doocy. We’re calling Doocy on this one. Pistachio eaters are the WORST.

Journo Love

“@washingtonweek Gwen, has anyone ever told you that you have really awesome reporters on your roundtable?” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty to PBS’s Gwen Ifill.

And Journo Hate

“Good luck @michellemalkin finishing 3rd grade. Your classmates wouldn’t sound as stupid/uninformed on TV as you did today on FNC.” — Current TV’s David Shuster to Conservative Commentator Michelle Malkin. He continued, “Maybe @michellemalkin didn’t bother to read anything on today’s topic because the words had too many syllables for her.” Shuster got his panties in a twist about Malkin saying that “the privilege claim proves Obama was at center of F&F. She was wrong + should apologize.” Last week Shuster attacked MSNBC’s Andrea Mitchell for running what many have deemed to be a shortened, biased clip of a Mitt Romney campaign speech involving Wawa convenient stores.

Spotted: If journos wanted to interview D.C. Del. Eleanor Holmes Norton this weekend, they would have found her at Home Depot Saturday afternoon buying flowering plants. She was solo, dressed in beige with dark shades and appeared to be in good spirits.

Spotted: Sen. Schumer’s flak Brian Fallon

“Spotted @brianefallon going into fudruckers. Apparently flaking makes you hungry for fried mounds of delicious pink slime.” — Outgoing Roll Call reporter and new Buzzfeed D.C. Bureau Chief John Stanton.

Journo to airline: F&@k you!

“Fuck you, United Express pilot and your low-altitude hard bank turns on final. I’ll punch you in your face.” — Mother Jones National Security reporter Adam Weinstein.

Unnecessary Tweet of the Day

“Rather improbably, I seem to be listening to a new Smashing Pumpkins album.” — Slate‘s second-tiered Boybander Matt Yglesias. He could have also easily won the prize for this: “New personal first: used duct tape to repair a duct.” Hey Matty, how about wrapping it over your typing fingers?

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.