JOE SCARBOROUGH CLOTHES TWIN?: “Our own Sam Stein is causing a lot of controversy with this shirt. What are your thoughts?” — HuffPost Media. 

Are we still talking about stuffing?

“Hate to complain, but that jucy lucy released a mere trickle of gooey dairy. I prefer to tap into geysers of cultured richness #stuffingsnob” — Roll Call HOH writer Warren Rojas.

Someone’s future job?

“Someone should go pro and write nothing but ‘Why I left journalism’ essays for a living.” — Politico‘s Burgess Everett.

Anti-right-wing media observer

“In the right wing media, the incentive for saying amazingly stupid/mean things is as strong as it ever was.” — Media Matters fellow Oliver Willis.

Speaking of the right wing media…

Media Research Center’s Tim Graham writes, “Pro-lifers shouldn’t confuse abortion w/ slavery. Slaves were allowed to live.” To which WaPo‘s Gene Weingarten says, “LOVE this kinda talk from the right!”

Multitasking is…

“OMG. A man with a laptop wearing sunglasses doing one armed bicep curls.” — CNN’s Carol Costello.

FishbowlDC Fan Club Board…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

In a story over the weekend, Politico‘s Maggie Haberman writes,

“Booker initially agreed to be interviewed by POLITICO, rescheduled twice, then canceled 20 minutes after a reporter asked for comment on criticisms he had received from a prominent New Jersey Democrat about how he’s handled his campaign rollout.”

Booker did appear on HBO’s “Real Time With Bill Maher” Friday night and was presumably supposed to provide a contrast to USA Today‘s Jackie Kucinich and actress Eva Longoria, who wore her hair in a bouncy high ponytail. The show isn’t the easiest, but then again Booker kept his ramblings vanilla and did nothing to make himself stand out in any way.

Haberman, meanwhile… continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

While heading to pre-tape an appearance for MSNBC’s “Last Word with Lawrence O’Donnell” on Friday, BuzzFeed‘s Chris Geidner broke two of his four eyes right in half.

Sadly, he was forced to sit through the segment largely unable to see and without his usual stylish frames resting on his face.

BuzzFeed‘s publicist Ashley McCollum forwarded a photo of the tortoiseshell casualty. Note that they’re Burberry brand (fancy!).

Though his vision may have been a blur, Geidner didn’t let it show on camera… continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

1. Which journo would you most want to spend the holidays with?

Dear God, do I have to? I’m fairly certain Hell would be filled with more cheer. But since I’m obligated to answer, I’ll put it to you this way – depends on the holiday.

Hanukkah – Chris Hayes, Ezra Klein, Dave Weigel and the rest of the Boy Banders. Some are Jewish, some aren’t, but that doesn’t matter because I’d imagine it would be an 8-day bender. Come to think of it, any 8-day stretch with them is probably a bender, and it would be a lot like hanging out at a hipster bar after all the hipsters moved on because the wannabes started outnumbering them. And I value my IQ points too much to emerge myself in that much MSNBC so I’ll just limit it to one MSNBCer and revise my remarks to Al Sharpton. This may seem like an odd choice but I think picking up all the remarks he mutters under his breath each of the 8-days would be amusing.

Christmas – Bill O’Reilly. Aside from the embarrassing gang on Fox & Friends, no one has done more to defend Christmas from idiots who seem only to engage in their “War on Christmas” to get publicity for their fringe group no one has ever heard of before or will hear from again than Bill. And I imagine the whole day will be spent tackling anyone who tries to TP a pine tree since he never stops.

Kwanza – Lawrence O’Donnell and Ed Schultz. Why would I pick the two whitest men on the planet next to Sean Hannity to spend a little-known, radical separatist black holiday with?  Because I think they’d try to celebrate it to prove they’re multi-cultural and would have no idea how to do it. Can you imagine anything more amusing than watching them trying on Dashikis and trying to mean it? I can’t.

Boxing Day – Howie Kurtz: For no particular reason.

Or course this is all moot, or at least most of it, since the world is ending on Dec. 21^st. So I’d just like to say thank you to the Mayans for saving me from this Hell.

2. Do you have high hopes that Jeff Zucker will really shake things up at CNN? 

Am I supposed to? I don’t have high hopes that the guy who sucked up NBC and re-unleashed Katie Couric on the world will be able to patch the hole in that Titanic. He’d have a better shot, and I’d probably actually care, if he were one of the Zuckers who brought us the movie “Airplane!” But he’s not, so I don’t.

Read about reporters sleeping with their sources… continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Last night actor and film director Clint Eastwood was the latest to give the talking-to-an-empty-chair routine a whirl. He did it on the final evening of the Republican National Convention, just before Mitt Romney officially became the party’s nominee for president. How fitting.

Standing at the podium, Eastwood motioned to the empty chair next to him and said he brought President Obama. He then entered into a monologue that got a few laughs but was mostly perceived as bizarre.

Ann Romney appeared on CBS this morning to talk about the convention. “He did a unique thing,” she said of Eastwood’s speech while laughing uncomfortably.

“Bill Clinton introducing Michael Dukakis just went to a distant second place as a bizarre moment,” NBC’s Tom Brokaw told Politico. Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker, meanwhile, said on MSNBC’s Morning Joe that Eastwood’s speech made him “cringe.”

Then again, this was an 82-year-old man giving an unscripted speech. And the empty-chair routine is a proven bust.

Back in March, MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell was set to interview Craig Sonner, the lawyer representing Florida Trayvon Martin killer George Zimmerman. Sonner bailed at the last minute. Rather than bringing on a contributor who might be on standby or moving to the next segment, O’Donnell asked the chair a series of questions, including: “Who is paying you? Who hired you?” and “Does George Zimmerman have a job?”

Comedy Central’s Jon Stewart noted the stupidity, saying he knows many people in New York City who talk to chairs and “none of them have TV shows.”

Two days later Thomas Roberts, also an anchor on MSNBC, had intended to interview Maggie Gallager, spokeswoman for the National Organization for Marriage. Roberts was unable to make the segment. But guess who was? continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Last week two female Michigan State congresswomen were barred from speaking on the House floor after angrily using the word “vagina” while debating an anti-abortion bill.

Daily Show host and comedian Jon Stewart mocked the House’s decision a few nights ago, saying, “What are they worried about? Vaginas aren’t like Voldemort or Beetlejuice. Invoking the name ‘vagina’ doesn’t make them suddenly appear.” He then highlighted in a “moment of zen” a clip of one CNN anchor saying sarcastically, “Fair warning: I’m about to say a word some of you are going to find offensive. So here’s the warning. Here we go: Vagina.”

MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell interviewed one of the congresswomen about an earlier protest that took place outside Michigan State Capitol, in which there was a live performance of the Vagina Monologues. During O’Donnell’s program, Metro Weekly‘s Chris Geidner tweeted, “If you don’t like vaginas, this is not your TV show.” – [O'Donnell], creating a false choice for me.”

Liberals also started the hashtag #sayvagina on Twitter. As with anything these days, particularly anything regarding vaginas, it was highjacked. “#Sayvagina but don’t say #8.2%JoblessRate,” wrote Breitbart.com Editor Dana Loesch.

Liberal radio show host Leslie Marshall tweeted, “#sayvagina I tell my toddlers to stop saying that in public! Grown women who are legislators? Go ahead!”

We asked a few journos around town what they thought about seeing so much vagina in the news lately and how they handle the subject in their own professional lives. HOH“s Neda Semnani told us it’s not weird at all. “That is what those crazy kids are calling that part of the body these days,” she told FBDC. “Other body parts with names that don’t make me feel awkward: penis, fallopian tube, uterus, urethra, testicle, balls, vulva, breast, boob, hair, nail, shin, pancreas, gland, cells, pinkie, big toe, follicle. Actually, scratch that… ‘Follicle’ sounds gross.”

A TV industry insider did some soul searching and remarked, “I hate the word ‘vagina.’ But not nearly as much as the dreaded P word. In everyday life I prefer to use C U Next Tuesday because it’s succinct and so offensive that it’s funny. In mixed company, I may opt for other humorous terms like ‘hatchet wound.’ But for TV, let’s all agree to stick with ‘vagina.’ That is, unless everyone can rally behind ‘pikachu’ or ‘tamagotchi.’”

A more serious Kevin Glass, managing editor of Townhall.com, said his publication has no official policy on the matter. “We don’t allow any words to be used in poor taste, but don’t censor our authors where it’s appropriate,” he said.

The Daily Caller‘s Taylor Bigler said she’s free when it comes to using the word. “‘Vagina’ is at the very bottom of the list of words that I’m squeamish about saying or using in copy,” she said. “It’s just a part of the body. I’m much more concerned about getting words like ‘douchebag’ and ‘Octomom porn’ past the editors.” Her boss, Editor-in-Chief Tucker Carlson, takes a far more conservative slant on the matter. “I approach that word as the ancient Israelites did YHWH: I have too much respect to use it lightly,” he said. On the subject of using the word on TV: “No.”

Host of XM Radio’s Press Pool Julie Mason told us she could say “vagina” loud and proud on the air if she wanted, but she tries playing it “mostly square.” She said, “My boss’s general rule is to imagine an eight-year old in the car listening to the show — don’t say things that might cause their parent to switch to [shock jock] Howard Stern as the sober alternative.”

Then there’s this from Bretibart News‘ Tony Lee, who by far had the most interesting personal policy on the matters. “I don’t use that term in person,” he said, “and given what I refer to it as would be too crude for print, I would write ‘female genitalia’ or ‘female genitals,’ which would be consistent with the the word choice in stories dealing with horrific ‘female genital’ mutilation.”

Author of the Mr. Media Training Blog Brad Phillips acknowledged how “absurd” it is “that if George Carlin were alive today, he’d need to expand his list of dirty words you can’t say on television to include ‘vagina.’” His personal advice on using “vagina” in media comes in the form of an introspective question: “Does it help them make their point, or does it serve as a distraction that prevents people from hearing their larger point?” He said the two state congresswomen used the word effectively, as “it drew national attention to an issue they were passionate about.”

Watch some vagina-talk clips after the jump…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Question to Ponder: “How many dumb people are going to think that President Obama is actually gay now?” — HuffPost‘s Ethan Klapper.

Quote Taken Out of Context

“And then @RadioBabe called me an asswipe. #nprlife” — NPR Elections Producer Arnie Seipel. Before that, he said, “Being serenaded on a Friday afternoon by @RadioBabe singing Patsy Cline’s Crazy.” Radio Babe is NPR Correspondent Andrea Seabrook.

Writer wonders about ‘prissy’ Cranbrook

“Why do prep schools have such so often have such prissy names? ‘Cranbrook?’” — Tucson Sentinel Technorati writer Jimmy Zuma, referring to the Michigan prep school Mitt Romney attended and site of the haircut incident.

A Boybander’s Emotional Admission

“Running is the only healthy thing I genuinely love to do but more and more my body’s telling me I shouldn’t. Having a hard time dealing.” — TPM‘s Brian Beutler.

Self-appointed Media Critic

“Why do I get the impression that news magazines would put *anything* on their covers to sell 5 extra copies?” — Politico‘s Roger Simon.

Unnecessary Tweet of the Day

“Just spotted in Santa Monica: car with Hawaii plate ALOHA. Car with most desired Hawaii license plate belongs in Hawaii.” — MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell with this stellar announcement you won’t likely see anywhere else in the next decade.

Journo sees connection to Prez’s fundraiser

“Obama fundraiser in NYC Monday — special guest Ricky Martin — is sold out, organizer says. Gee. Wonder why?” — Politico‘s Glenn Thrush.

Eddie Scarry contributed to this report.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

CLOONEY ARRIVES: Washington’s favorite paparazzi journo Colin Drummond captures George Clooney arriving at Union Station last night. See more at ColinDaily.com.

Chuck Todd’s mea culpa

“Look I apologize. Someone was talking in my ear in the middle of your question. I’ll admit that. Hit me one more time.” — NBC’s Chuck Todd to Lawrence O’Donnell on MSNBC last night. O’Donnell had asked, “What’s in it for Rick Santorum in Mississippi?”

Journo gets accused of being hateful

“So far tonight I have been told that I hate Santorum, I hate Romney, I hate Gingrich and I hate Ron Paul.” — Cox Radio Congressional Correspondent Jamie Dupree.

Reporter witnesses wallet snatching on Metro

“Just witnessed thieve [sic] steal young woman’s wallet in foggy bottom metro station. Cop didn’t show up til too late. #Obamaeconomy #holderdoj” — The Daily Caller‘s Matthew Boyle.

From CNN Wolf Blitzer’s fan club…

“I love when Wolf Blitzer gives us a ‘Significant major major development’ – it’s so exciting! #elections” –  DC Grrl. She works in WaPo‘s marketing department.

Henry Vomit

“Shep had some fun w/Campaign Carl during a live shot by claiming Mitt Romney — standing behind Carl — was wearing ‘Mom jeans’ — FNC family member and Chief White House Correspondent Ed Henry.

Conservative blogger obnoxiously baits the first lady

“I was raised on down home food — meat, greens, beans, yams, biscuits, etc. — and still still skinny. My health secret? MARLBOROS, baby. My skinny kids eat Mickey D’s. Does the First Lady have a problem with that?” — Conservative blogger Robert Stacy McCain as classy as ever.

A Clint Eastwood reality show? Ugh

“Say it ain’t so, Clint. Say it ain’t so.” — ABC News White House Correspondent Jake Tapper in reaction to Clint Eastwood getting a reality TV show.

Blogger gets migraine

“Ick, migraine’s here. Haven’t had one like this in a really long time. Again, ick.” — DCGOPGirl.

Train ride from hell

“Of course I’m in the @amtrak car with the loudest squeaking chairs ever and the crying babies. and train is sold out. #goodtimes.” — Publicist extraordinaire Dannia Hakki who put on the FBDC party at The Lost Society. ABC7′s Stephen Tschida is having flashbacks just reading this.

Fish Poll Results: Yesterday we asked readers what they thought of “Game Change.” We learned that 32.88 percent of you “loved it,” found it “fair to everyone” and agree that it “accurately portrayed the book.” Interestingly, 26.03 percent “hated it” and thought it inaccurately portrayed the book and another 26.03 percent of you “haven’t read the book” but nonetheless liked the movie.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

The NYP’s Page Six is reporting news of a budding romance. It may not be so “budding” at this point. Rumors have been swirling for months over these two — it’s MSNBC’s Tamron Hall, 41, and Lawrence O’Donnell, 60. Even network insiders have been hearing heavy chatter about it.

NYP posted the news late last night. They say the pair have been “canoodling at downtown haunts.”

MSNBC declined to weigh in on the matter.

See here.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Journos ding victory night music

“Did not anticipate I would be in a sweaty ballroom full of Republicans rocking out to ‘Pump Up the Jam’ tonight. Life is full of surprises.” — The Atlantic‘s Molly Ball.

“Music at Gingrich party is essentially a Casey Kasem grab bag from 1992 (i.e. atrocious)” — CNN’s Peter Hamby.

“Gingrich event a sauna cum mosh pit Must be 400+ people crammed into this small event room at Hilton #scprimary” –  Mail Online‘s U.S. Exec. Editor Toby Harnden.

Radio host blames dreams on Buffy

“Alarm went off this am, reached over to turn it off, and said calmly, ‘Well, clearly she’s possessed.’ #weirddreams #watchingtoomuchbuffy” — WMAL’s and Daily Caller‘s Mary Katharine Ham.

Whoops!

“With me are two experts, the co authors of Game Change…TIME‘s Mark Halperin and New York Magazine’s John Halperin.” — MSNBC’s Chris Matthews on Saturday night. John’s surname is Heilemann.

Reporter calls out the pundits

“Pretty much every pundit + journo in America has said Romney certainly will be nominee. Will the whole lot of ‘em reverse course tomorrow?” — RealClearPolitics’ Erin McPike.

Irony…“Newt, humbled by tonight’s results, is now explaining how stupid everyone in Washington is.” — National Review Online‘s Jim Geraghty.

Bold admission

“Ok, i’m done for the evening RT’ing about things I have no firsthand knowledge of.” — NBC Washington cameraman Jim Long.

Another reason for Newt to hate the media

“Odd delay. Newt announced, then…..nothin” — PBS’s Gwen Ifill.

“Even in victory, Newt can’t help but be a gigantic dick.” — NYT Magazine Contributing Writer and Men’s Journal Contributing Editor Stephen Rodrick.

NBC’s ‘MTP’ can’t be psyched about this…

MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell‘s advice for Newt on the eve of his Sunday “MTP” appearance: “I would cancel Meet the Press immediately.” The Rev. Al Sharpton: “I think he will blow it in the one-on-one interview.”

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Dear Harry and Louise:

My sister is in a relationship with a married man who has two kids. He keeps promising to propose to her once he divorces the first love of his life. My sister is an accomplished specialist physician, but she is somehow infatuated with this bogus character. He’s a nobody with a rap sheet of killing a man while driving under the influence of alcohol. He never told her all the complications he had in his life until he ensured that she couldn’t do without him. I have tried my very best to talk her out of it, but she seems charmed by him. Bear in mind that his real life is going on normally with his wife and kids, which makes my sister his spare-time mistress.

Please help me find a way to break them up without hurting my sister, for she entrusted me with her heart, and I can’t support her, nor can I think of a way to keep him away.

Am I the only person thinking that they are starting to stage their questions? Has this not been the plot line for hundreds of movies? What’s next? Let me guess…

“Dear Harry and Louise, I am a protagonist loner who longs to find the love of my life. I have met someone who comes from a different way of life and culture than me. Will society ever accept us? Will our love endure the test of time despite those around us not giving us their blessing?”

Before we wade into the murky waters of relationship advice…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

QUESTION – I need advice on what could be an awkward and uncomfortable situation. I am going to a friend’s wedding in a few weeks, and she has recently reconnected with an old high school friend of hers, who will also be at the wedding. Here’s where it gets interesting. I was almost the maid of honor to this old high school friend. She was engaged to my brother, but she had an affair and ended the engagement. I haven’t seen her in four years, and I’m not sure how friendly—or unfriendly—to act.

RESPONSE – OK, so we are going off the rails this week. Instead of giving our advice to Brother’s Keeper, we are going to offer free, unsolicited advice to Harry Jaffe. Because Harry’s response to this question in his advice column is so weird, we couldn’t ignore it. So, please read his advice to the question:

HARRY’S ANSWER – A few years ago, Louise and I attended a swank national book award ceremony and dinner at the Folger Library . . . so haute intellectual. Across the room, I spotted a writer with whom I had once been very close. Though we had become alienated because he thought I’d behaved badly with a woman, he still affected a faux closeness and always greeted me as if we were still tight. This phoniness had been festering for four years. So that evening, I crossed the room, tapped him on the shoulder, and told him he could take his false friendship and shove it.

I felt great—for about an hour. We haven’t spoken since. I regret my impulsive reaction.

Perhaps my short-lived self-satisfaction will help you through your unexpected meeting with the woman who brought your brother low. If you confront her, it might make you feel better for a few minutes, but it won’t last. Best to be cordial, perhaps chilly. She did unto your brother, not unto you. Besides, there’s no need for drama. It’s your friend’s wedding. Do nothing to ruin her day.

OUR ANSWER – Wait, really? THAT’S your great advice? Apparently, we need to try and help Harry, too.

First of all, yes we all caught the  not-so-subtle brag about being part of the “haute intellectual.” Way to crowbar that in. Second, you “behaved badly with a woman??” Details please! You know your wife is the co-author of this advice column, don’t you? Third, we do applaud you on having an aversion to phoniness. But Harry, the point of an advice column is to HELP other people. Not to to try and impress us with the fact that you won’t back down from an altercation, even at hoity toity events around town. Although, we would like to see how long a “haute intellectual” like you would last in a fistfight.

You can read more Harry and Louise here

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Today FishbowlMatt and I take you inside last night’s book party at the Northwest Washington home of Daily Caller Editor-in-Chief Tucker Carlson and his wife, Susie, for famed ex-lobbyist Jack Abramoff. The book: Capitol Punishment: The Hard Truth About Washington Corruption From America’s Most Notorious Lobbyist. We’ll give you a play-by-play interpretation of what went down — FishbowlDC style. Some of it’s blind quoting, eavesdropping, and prison jokes, for which we make no apologies. Some of it’s petty and juvenile and involves taking advantage of people who have had a few drinks (a la HuffPost‘s Drunken Specialist Sam Stein), for which we also make no apologies. By the way, actor Kevin Spacey and former Washington Mayor Marian Barry both RSVP’d that they’d attend. Neither showed. Who did? Find out after the jump…

Let’s begin.

5:07 p.m. FishbowlMatt texts and wants to know what I’m wearing. I tell him I’m dressing down, that we’re going to a party where there will be an island of misfits and we can wear whatever we want. I assure him my outfit will not incorporate Stephanie Green golf ball-size multi-strand pearl necklaces.

6:40 p.m. We arrive fashionably early Tucker’s house and are greeted by friendly valets.

6:41 p.m. Publicist Janet Donovan arrives by cab with a giant golden handbag.

6:42 p.m. It’s 66 degrees outside. Roaring fire clearly for ambiance. Not function.

6:45 p.m. Tucker is holding court by the fireplace discussing the Politico story about The Daily Caller‘s “growing pains” published earlier in the day. He has a lot of reactions, one of which involves explaining the importance of “pissing up.” All in all, the story didn’t upset him.

6:55 p.m. We go to the more remote bar off the living room where intern Jordan Bloom is dressed in a white shirt and black bow tie and tending bar. Matt writes, “We meet Jordan Bloom, battered intern.”

7 p.m. Daily Caller reporter Matthew Boyle arrives and chats up Tucker about the Politico story. Boyle refuses to talk to any member of the press on the record.

7:10 p.m. We run into communications exec David Bass in a big fat striped suit. The suit has fat blue and white stripes; Bass isn’t plump. We start snapping his picture. He wants a do over, explaining, “I have the same stupid look on my face in every picture. Let me try not to look stupid.”

7:20 p.m. Oh look. It’s The Weekly Standard/Daily Caller‘s Matt Labash. He quickly admires FishbowlMatt’s gray tweed pants and says I’m not allowed to write anything about anything he says or he’ll break both my legs (the first part of this is true). FBDCMatt describes his trousers as a “tweed flannel hybrid.” Labash is clearly impressed.

7:21 p.m. More guests arrive. FishbowlMatt commentary: “There’s a glitterball coming in right now.”

7:22 p.m. Bathroom door locks but doesn’t latch. Not worth taking a chance. (Capitol File Editor-in-Chief Kate Bennett will later say someone walked in on her while she was in the can. She says she was just washing her hands.)

7: 25 p.m. Politico‘s Patrick Gavin and FishbowlMatt begin an in-depth conversation about no-iron shirts. Matt says he’s a “holy hell sweater.” Gavin says he plans to buy a decent wardrobe in the new year. Tonight he has worn a long-sleeved maroon shirt made of waffle material. It’s from the Gap.

7:30 p.m. I place a half-full wine glass on a stack of Jack Abramoff books for a moment and an undisclosed reporter says, “He was in prison for three years and tried not to get rimmed and look what you’re doing with a wine glass on the Abramoff books.”

7:33 p.m. An undisclosed reporter asks, “Who is that fat guy on the couch? I mean, he’s ‘stop-on-the-street’ fat. Isn’t he?”

7:34 p.m.: NYT‘s Mark Leibovich chats with partygoers. He says the book’s slowly coming along but that he must get back to regular newspaper writing soon. Guests tell him they can’t wait to read his book.

7:35 p.m. The living room speeches begin. Tucker says (in part): “I think Jack is a genuinely nice person. I don’t trust anyone who hasn’t been humiliated in public.” He mentions being on “Dancing With the Stars.”

7:37 p.m. Jack: “I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart,” he tells a packed room of guests. “This is my first book and may be my last if no one reads it.” He explains that his publicist Janet “is working me to the ground. I had 17 interviews today. I don’t have a tail and horns.” He says his wife, Pam, doesn’t read newspapers or watch TV. He also says she kept removing herself from the book until he explained that he had to explain where their children came from. Jack on prison life: “It’s a horrific place.” Jack on the kindness of others: “I’m not sure we deserve it, but I hope we keep meriting your friendship.” He recounts being on FNC’s Sean Hannity‘s program last week. He told Hannity he was going to appear on MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell‘s show. Hannity tried to talk him out of it, telling him it was a waste of time. Jack appeared on O’Donnell’s “Last Word” anyhow and grew frightened as he spotted Michael Moore. He thought to himself, ‘We better hide.’ Soon he hears Moore inquiring, “Where’s Jack?” Moore approached and said, “God bless you. Keep up the great work. It’s fantastic.” Jack’s reaction: “Am I dreaming?” He calls the evening at Carlson’s home “the finest night of our lives in the last eight years. This tops them all.”

8:30 p.m. (roughly): A guest is ready to leave. He remarks, “I think I’ve done my time here, so to speak.” Reporters in the vicinity laugh.

Find out which reporter with a liberal agenda crashed the party…

continued…

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

We start off with this caption from an anonymous journalist. We’ll add more as the day wears on. Send to FishbowlDC@mediabistro.com or to Betsy@mediabistro.com. All entries are anonymous unless you instruct otherwise. As always, keep it clean (relatively).

“Look into my eyes.”

Hayes, seen here in the reflection of a girls locker room window, is wanted for questioning.

Moments later this sinister look turned to turned to disappointment when the realization set in that even if he had “The Force,” he was on MSNBC, so there was no one watching to control.

It puts the lotion in the basket [a repeat, yes, but reader assures it still fits]

Welcome To Another Edition of ‘To Catch A Predator, Boyband Edition’

“Hmm — I wonder what Ezzy and Annie are doing while I’m on their television screen.”

Hayes, 11, Demonstrating His Patented ‘Nerd Steel’ Gaze

“Does my mean face make me look less Rachel Maddow-ish?”

“Can you believe my wife gets turned on by this? Me neither.”

“Seriously! I’m not Rachel Maddow.”

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.

Morning Attire

“@morningmika LOVE your dress today. Where is it from?” — Monica Trauzzi, Managing Editor and anchor, E&ETV. Mika’s dress is pictured above.

A new one: D.C. women and taxicabs?

“Cabs in DC are just like girls in DC: They always look available, but they never are.” — Bright Young Thing‘s Steve Place.

Professor Ezzy grades Obama’s speech

“On policy a very Solid B+. He would have needed something bigger and completely impassable to fill the hole we’re in.” — WaPo liberal blogger and lead Boybander Ezra Klein on MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell program last night.

Bio of the Day

The Daily Caller‘s TV writer Jeff Poor: “Professional jerk, non-denominational Christian & media reporter (sounds redundant, I know) for The Daily Caller. Oh yeah, and War Eagle.”

That tiger Rep. Wu

“Former Rep. David Wu, who was there tonight, responds to Obama’s speech: ‘IT’S GRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!’ (Hat Tip @OKnox)” — Yahoo! News‘ Chris Moody.

Column moves journo to tears

“Peggy Noonan legit has me in tears with her column: ‘We’ll never forget. Nor should we.’ — Politicizer Editor Conor Rogers. Read here.

Opinion writer employs first daughter humor

“White House Press Office says Malia and Sasha support Obama’s jobs plan.” — The Washington Examiner‘s Philip Klein. He was mocking a slew of “BLANK supports President Obama’s jobs plan” statements that rolled in last night after the speech.

New Career Opportunities Daily: The best jobs in media.