Quotes of the Day

LOOK CLOSELY: “Since it’s photobomb sharing day, here’s me creeping up on Newt.” — BuzzFeed‘s Kate Nocera.

Actor Richard Belzer tells Politico newsroom to SHUT UP

“Richard Belzer to noisy POLITICO newsroom: “We’re working here … we’re on fucking TV.” Once done taping: ‘OK, you can start talking now.’” — Politico‘s Jennifer Epstein.

Female editor gets suggestion to be a man

“Just got an email suggesting I publish my columns under a male pseudonym.” — Syndicated columnist and Editor-in-Chief of TheContributor.com Tina Dupuy.

How to Make it All About Me

“Pretty awesome that I can knock the entire @DSCC communications shop off message for an hour with a single tweet. Sucks for @EdMarkey tho.” — NRSC Spokesman Brad Dayspring.

Editor restrains himself on “shit” headline

“Tempted to title this working piece ‘immigration reform: shit just got real’ but wholly realize that is inappropriate.” – Townhall Managing Editor Kevin Glass.

Dieting tips from Newt Gingrich

“McDonald’s grilled chicken McWrap at 250 calories is both a dollar and pound bargain.” — Former plump Presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich.

Tale of the waistband

“Feb 5 – Christie eats donuts on Letterman. Feb 6 – tells frmr WH doc to stop saying his weight is dangerous.The next week – lap band surgery.” — ABC Producer Emily Friedman.

Editor can’t sleep, then oversleeps

“Could not sleep last night. Now I’ve overslept. And I am late for an 8 a.m. meeting in the office. Rushing through the rain.” — MetroWeekly Editor-in-Chief Randy Shulman.

Not for Attribution: “Oh my heavens, I just put the nastiest thing in my mouth, some rounded chocolate almond imposter that was in the People gift bag. I literally just spit it out. It tasted like wet sand.”

Quotes of the Day

Short, sweet and to the point

“I became a newspaperman because of Roger. It’s a debt I can never repay. It’s a cliché I am sure he would never use, but now he has passed on to his everlasting seat in the balcony.” — Politico Columnist Roger Simon in a beautifully brief account of how film critic Roger Ebert poignantly touched his life. Ebert died Thursday. See Simon’s must-read story here.

Ouch!

“Ron Fournier overheard Sen. Paul call Rep. Rigell about guns – and still POLITICO scooped him.” — Politico‘s Dan Berman, who linked to this story. His trash talking victim: National Journal‘s Ron Fournier.

What comes around goes around

TIME‘s Andrew Katz: “Chris Hughes: Politico ‘prefers speed over accuracy,’ after question about TNR wanting to be DC’s New Yorker. Zing?” (TNR Publisher Chris Hughes spoke at Columbia University Thursday.)

Politico‘s Ben White plays defense: “Chris Hughes is partially correct. We prefer speed. But only over slowness.”

What could possibly go wrong?

“Time to double my medication and hope for the best. I probably shouldn’t have been drinking. But who pays attention to the warnings?” — MetroWeekly Editor-in-Chief Randy Shulman in his best imitation of Valley of the Dolls. We think he also might be watching too much Conrad Murray on CNN’s AC360.

Reporter could “die” over shitty panel

“Ugh this Newseum panel on journalism is so sanctimonious I could die.” — HuffPost‘s Lucia Graves.

Ex-Roll Callers react to changes

On Thursday we reported a variety of changes at CQ Roll Call, namely that six Roll Call reporters would now be working primarily for CQ.com and reporting to new bosses.

USA Today‘s Paul Singer: “I hate what is happening to Roll Call.”

Politico‘s John Bresnahan: “It’s terrible, a crying shame.”

Reporter explains what it’s like having her name, and HuffPost’s Social Media Editor expected a lot more from Oprah… Read more

Quotes of the Day

The Hill’s Editor-at-Large on the mend

“Docs told I have switch to shuffleboard and quit trying to be another Roger Federer. Sending me home today with strict instructions to quit chasing cat downstairs and wife upstairs.” — The Hill‘s Editor-at-Large Al Eisele who has been in the ICU this week with a blood clot after taking a spill on the tennis court. Eisele is still in the hospital, but is out of the ICU. He’s receiving emails on his new iPad at alesiele@thehill.com.

Whoa! Manners on Cable News? 

“You and I don’t see the world with the same set of eyes.” — California Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsome quietly and politely to Brian Brown, President of the National Organization for Marriage, during an appearance on CNN’s “The Lead” Tuesday. The topic: gay marriage. Newsome was for it; loudmouthed porky Brown was opposed.

On HuffPost coming out of closet

“Once we learned that @HuffPostGay is gay, we began to look at the issue in a different light,” — HuffPost Washington Bureau Chief Ryan Grim in reaction to our post on HuffPost‘s rainbow avatar that debuted Tuesday.

Politico Playbook Publish Time: 8:49 a.m.

Reporter detects brain farts in columnist’s views

“Wow. Shithead ‘legendary’ newspaperman proposes taxing email to subsidize Post Office.” — Reason‘s Nick Gillespie on the magazine’s Matt Welch‘s story on George Skelton, a California political writer who has worked for LAT since 1974. He has done stints in both Sacramento and Washington. Skelton said he’d allow about 100 private emails a month tax free. Beyond that, taxable.

An excerpt from Welch’s story:

“How about you leave me alone, George Skelton, by not taking my money in the name of keeping open money-losing post offices?

Read the whole column for such columnar brain-fartery as “I’d allow everyone a certain number of untaxed, private emails a month — 100, maybe 200. After that, each message would cost one cent, up to a certain size.” Hat tip to Michael C. Moynihan.”

Rather Unusual Question to Ponder: “Is it wrong to secretly record an ex’s rant so you can remember what he gets like when he goes zero to sixty out of nowhere? #covertactivity.” — MetroWeekly Founder and Editor-in-Chief Randy Shulman.

Quotes of the Day

AUNTIE OF THE CENTURY: “This is what 100 years old looks like on my amazing great aunt, Helen Forbrich. Happy birthday, Auntie Helen!” — WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty.

Baier’s son to get heart tests

“Good morning! Paul’s getting some tests on his heart this morning at @childrenshealth & he’s into “Wreck it Ralph”!” — FNC’s Bret Baier with accompanying photograph.

Reporter hates talking points requests 

“Least fav tweets are pols asking followers to retweet the talking points they’ve already tweeted 1,000 times before.” — CQ Roll Call White House reporter Steven Dennis.

This is how rumors get started

“Norm Coleman on CNN right now…Wonder if Zucker is trying him out as a regular contributor? Talking with Hilary Rosen about #Oscars.” — Jennifer Moire, public affairs and media consultant.

A boiling hot idea for next year’s Oscars

“Next year they should just have Satan host the Oscars.” — Politico‘s Ben White.

Journos face rough start to week

“Yep, please start my Monday morning with construction knocking out the water pipes … Again.” — Politico‘s Seung Min Kim.

“Apparently I slept on a mouse. True, it was a stuffed toy mouse, but the sight still jolted me as I got out of bed. #helloMonday” — Metro Weekly‘s Randy Shulman.

Politico Playbook Publish Time: 9:29 a.m.

Editor feels pulled in different directions…

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Quotes of the Day

“My little nugget gained 1.5 lbs in two weeks.” — Tim Wong, WaPo designer.

After last week’s televised tenseness in which MSNBC “Morning Joe” Co-hosts Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinksi butted heads on chauvinist matters and he snapped his fingers in her face to move on, Scarborough made three New Year’s resolutions directed to Brzezinksi morning on “Morning Joe.” Well, at least two were directed her way: 1) “I’m not going to do that ever again.” 2) “I’m going to try to not interrupt you less in the new year.” 3) “The next time we go to the White House, I’m going to try very hard to not poop my pants.”

Chocolate Vs. Onion

“If you put a bar of chocolate next to an onion (any variety, but shallot preferred) and said ‘choose,’ I’d go for the onion every time.” — Randy Shulman, Co-Publisher of MetroWeekly.

Sherri Shepherd reports on son’s pancake breath

“As Jeffrey eats pancakes w syrup dripping from his mouth, I savor my hot water w lemon, oatmeal w berries knowing that being healthy is #1. Jeffrey now wants to kiss me w his pancake & syrup breath… WHYYYY NOWWWW. The saying ‘I want to eat you up’ is taking on a new meaning!” –  ABC “The View’s” Sherri Shepherd.

Shiner moves into self-loathing with sports analogy

“Ugh. I am the people I hate. I just used a sports analogy when talking about politics. #mendozaline #congressionaldisapproval #whoami?” — Roll Call‘s Meredith Shiner.

Travel Bitches

“The good: I bought a real New York bagel. The bad: I’m in dingy Penn Station. The ugly: And it’s not even 7 a.m.” — Washington Examiner‘s Naomi Jagoda, who explained she was in New York and New Jersey celebrating her grandfather’s 80th birthday.

Deep thoughts with two TV journos and a Breitbart editor bitchslaps CNN’s Piers Morgan…

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Quotes of the Day

Dear Fishbowlers: Various things stole our attention this morning, so just for today we’re offering an afternoon version of Morning Chatter. Won’t be a habit.

The “sexy-ass” Michael Tomasky

“@bpshow always good 2 get up early in san fran 2 see the sexy-ass Michael Tomasky on the tube. Bill, have him on more often!!” — Rhonda. Tomasky is a special correspondent for Newsweek/The Daily Beast.

Spotted in D.C…. BuzzFeed publicist Ashley McCollum, who was visited from Manhattan, drinking Jasmine-flavored tea last night at a mysterious tea house off Dupont Circle. We hear she later dined with BuzzFeed‘s Zeke Miller and Slate‘s Dave Weigel.

A word of advice to D.C. flacks

“Tip of day for DC flacks: If subj line of your email simply reads ‘Press Release,’ there is zero chance I am looking at it.” — The Hill‘s Managing Editor Bob Cusack.

Um, he’s has what?

“Hint: He’s white and has a penis.” — Metro Weekly political reporter, Justin Snow, reaction to a tweet from National Journal that asks, “Who will replace Jack Lew as Chief of Staff?”

Reporter gets yogurt news from Sen. Chuck Schumer

“Inbox: ‘SCHUMER REVEALS FAGE YOGURT TO BE SERVED AT THE PRESIDENTIAL INAUGURAL CEREMONIES ­ PRESIDENT WILL GET A TASTE OF THE MOHAWK VALLEY’ — Roll Call‘s Meredith Shiner.

Important Q’s to Ponder: “Do I go to the gym four nights in a row? Am I that serious about losing weight?” — Randy Shulman, co-publisher of Metro Weekly.

A typical Washington scene setter, complete with doughy men who haven’t seen a gym in awhile…Also: see who’s now on the FishbowlDC Fan Club Board…

Read more

The newest feature in the Fishbowl is one that might be a little hard to stomach. It’s not like we ENJOY looking for gross stuff to talk about, but some people can’t help but tweet nasty stuff. People who repeatedly tweet pictures of their meals are already obnoxious. But, Metro Weekly publisher Randy Shulman took it one ugly step further, and for that, we’re grateful.

On Tuesday, he tweeted directly at McDonald’s to show them his lunch. I believe that if you buy your lunch at McDonald’s, you’re asking for trouble. The last time I ate that shit, I was on a road trip and had no other option. The burger tasted like wax and medicine and I have no sympathy for anyone who gets a bad meal there.

What did Shulman order? Read more

Quotes of the Day

Bus driver caught reading while driving

“Metrobus driver caught driving bus while reading newspaper.” — ABC7. The original video appeared on the classy-named Unsuck DC Metro. Read more here. Horribly, maybe this is proof that print isn’t going out of style. But more importantly, which NEWSPAPER was it?!

Scribe brings mom to WH Xmas party

“Was so proud to take my mom to the White House Christmas party tonight. About 50 more of ‘em should make up for all the trouble I caused.” — Reuters‘ Sam Youngman earlier this week.

Febreze makes a sudden, inexplicable comeback

“The person who invented Febreze is a genius.” — MetroWeekly‘s Randy Shulman.

COS will dedicate special 3,000th tweet to deceased mother

“66 tweets to go to 3,000. I hope to make the 3000th on Dec 28 a tribute to my mother who passed away Dec 28 2006. Got any ideas? Thanks all.”  — Jim Sciutto, Chief of Staff to U.S. Emb. Bejing (and the Dept. of WTF?).

Monkeys on meth: How do they behave?

“Brief conversation with a US senator just now re monkeys on meth. Conclusion: They act crazy.” — Todd Zwillich, Washington correspondent for The Takeaway from Public Radio International.

Reporter wants to gorge on chocolate

“I love advent calendars. Is it too late to start one? I could just eat all the chocolate up to today in a day.” — The Hill’s Alexandra Jaffe.

Peter Ogburn and Eddie Scarry contributed to this report.

See who made the FishbowlDC Fan Club Board… Read more

Quotes of the Day

“The networks are all driving me crazy to do television shows—“a ratings machine”—but because of Apprentice have been loyal to NBC.” — Former never had a shot in hell presidential hopeful Donald Trump.

Journo meets her twin: Rachel Maddow (And no, we’re not referring to MSNBC’s Chris Hayes)

“Never met Maddow until now. We kind of look alike. My intro: ‘Are you my long lost sister?’ Her: ‘Glad we both got the memo.’ Maddow, heading into West Wing, said she was here for a ‘hippie cabal.’ Asked if I was coming. NO, DAMN IT, I WASN’T INVITED.” — HuffPost‘s Jennifer Bendery.

Capitol Police come to the rescue of a cell phone

“Phone just fell and slid into a member’s personal storage closet. Big thanks to the five Capitol Police who came to rescue it.” — Lauren French, Politico Pro tax reporter.

Dan Froomkin tweets like a 12-year-old

“If u cn give info 2 the press w/no intent of it going 2 enemy & b found guilty of aiding the enemy… that’s scary.”  — HuffPost‘s Dan Froomkin, who has been taking tweeting lessons from Politico‘s Jonathan Martin. Read this 5 times. He links 2 this.

Important Q’s to Ponder: “Didn’t Anna Wintour and Rod Blagojevich get there [sic] hair from same play doh factory?” — Breitbart.com‘s Dana Loesch. And this: What are anna wintour’s qualifications to be uk ambassador other than her accent? (which is very good.)” — ABC News reporter Matt Negrin.

Tapper on Beck’s show to discuss — are you crazy, what else? — The OutPost

“Here I am on @glennbeck’s show today talking about The Outpost.” — ABC News Senior White House Correspondent Jake Tapper. His next appearance: Sesame Street, followed by Snapped.  bit.ly/TMEVDE

Smart ass!

“How about ‘up?’ That’s a direction.” — HuffPost‘s Jeff Young in a moment of dripping sarcasm. He was reacting to this from NBC News: “NASA needs stronger direction to lead in space, report finds.”

Cliffhanger: Journo weighs reconciliation with ex

“After a year apart the ex wants to reconcile. He has definitely changed. #sohaveI #surprisingdecision” — MetroWeekly‘s Randy Shulman. He continued, “Sometimes the only correct answer is no. #doingsomethingformyselfforonce.” And finally: “Have agreed to have dinner and hear him out at least.” Hey Randy, let us know what happens! Now we’re invested.

Senator questions armored cars at pumpkin festivals

“Spending must be cut for #fiscalcliff when gov pays for armored vehicles to guard rural pumpkin festivals. All in my DHS report out tmrw.” — Sen. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.).

Hess on fence on nipple-related act

“Is projectile ejaculating frosting from your nipples a feminist act? Katy Perry says no but I’m still on the fence.” — Slate blogger Amanda Hess. She links to this story that she wrote headlined: “Enough with the feminism police.”

Find out what’s making Steve Buttry all nostalgic… Read more

Quotes of the Day

CONTEMPLATIVE: “Getting ready for Meet the Press this morning from Richmond” — House Maj. Leader Eric Cantor (R-Va.) in a moment of deep, meditative, almost wax figure silence before going on the program.

“Okay, buddy. Great night. Get some sleep. In about 72 hours, Axelrod’s gonna be looking for us.” — Joe’s Mustache (@AMJoesMoustache) to MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough, who made a campaign bet last week that will either have him growing a stache or Obama Campaign Advisor David Axelrod shaving his off.

Sunday morning at 4:38 a.m.: “I would like about 3 more hours of sleep. Instead: DCA.” — Yahoo! News’ Olivier Knox.

Journo hears anti-gay sentiment on trail

“An irate attendee at this Boehner event in OH told me she opposes Obama because ‘he’s forcing through this gay shit.’ Alrighty then!” — HuffPost‘s Jennifer Bendery.

Editor invents new Twitter terminology

“Defining new term: Twitter War Hostage| when yr handle gets dragged along in twitter fight btw 2 others long after u have anything 2do w/it.” — TPM Editor Josh Marshall.

Journo nightmare

“I had a terrible dream that I set my clock back and it was Nov. 4, 2011.” — Politico‘s Maggie Haberman.

On Saturday night NBC “MTP’s” David Gregory encouraged everyone to have fun with daylight savings: “My feeling is don”t wait until 2am to turn your clocks back. Have some fun with it. Do it now.”

Editor wrestles with cat’s underarm hair

“Spent half an hour untangling my cat’s underarm hair – finally had to give up and cut out a matted hunk #MaineCoonproblems.” — Washington Gardener Editor Kathy Jentz, who clearly made the most of her daylight savings time this weekend.

Anticipation: “Moving to my third coffee shop of the day. … But, I’m thinking y’all will think this story is worth it.” — BuzzFeed‘s Chris Geidner. Anticipation II: “Hour 19 of today: waiting. waiting. and more waiting. We cannot wait to actually have control of our own lives.” — LAT‘s Maeve Reston.

Captain Obvious: “In three days, we’ll know who the president will be for the next four years! Barack Obama or Mitt Romney?” — The Daily Caller‘s Matthew Boyle. What?!?! Is there an election??? We’re thinking he should stick with stories on senators and Dominican prostitutes.

Irony is…

“Starbucks Dupont believes in overheating its coffee to mouth-scalding temperatures but they’re too cheap to turn on the friggin’ heat.” — MetroWeekly‘s Randy Shulman.

FNC’s ‘Fair and Balanced’ reaches preposterous proportions

“Fox News anchor: If viewers want ‘far-left’ news, they go to MSNBC. If they want ‘fair and balanced,’ they come here.” — HuffPost‘s Amanda Terkel.

D.C. publicist would rather do anything than watch Sen. Rob Portman. And which Politico reporter basically tells complaining NY marathoners to STFU? Also: journo witness to giant car wreck caused by a bear.

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