FBLA so seldomly encounters Pynchon enthusiasts among our readers. But Matt Haley, one of the creative talents behind Who Wants to be a Superhero as well as a superhero artisthero, defied our admittedly low expectations when he answered our mythic questions.

1. What newspapers do you read? They still make those?

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? Oh, the Onion, absolutely.

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark? The family-friendly ones are usually art sites, painters’ and illustrators’ blogs, people who are way more talented than I could ever hope to be. I bookmarked mine, too, just in case I get lost. The others, well…artists see naked people everyday, we’re like doctors. Right?

4. Where do you get your car washed?No car, I usually take the MTA. Don’t look at me that way.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? Wayne. He is the best dentist in the world. Dentists say they’re ‘painless’, this guy really is. First time I had oral surgery, I’m in the chair, and I’m envisioning that scene from Marathon Man where Dustin Hoffman is being tortured. He tells me to close my eyes (never a good sign), and I notice my jaw is starting to go numb, but I hadn’t felt that dry pinch of the Xylocaine needle. I pry open one eyelid and drunkenly ask if he’s using some kind of spray or brush to apply the painkiller, and he calmly replies, “No, I have a rather large needle in your jaw, I’m just really careful.” I’m putting his kids through college, now.

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Sr. Editor at PR Newswire, Cathleen Cotter, fancies herself as an Arthurian enchantress. And we can see why. She did answer our insidiously insightful questions without the use of ancient magicks.

1. What newspapers do you read? L.A. Times on weekends, the Argonaut (local paper), LA Weekly, City Beat (otherwise I get my news online)

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? none, but I do enjoy reading the paper while out with my friends for breakfast on the weekend and we read interesting bits to each other.

3. Which Web sites (besides FBLA) are on your favorites bookmark? I don’t really use bookmarks. The tabs on my Firefox browser are set to Flickr, Gmail, CNN, LA Observed and Curbed L.A.

4. Where do you get your car washed? This place on Lincoln, north of Washington Blvd.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? Yes–Marilyn

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PR Week’s Los Angeles bureau chief, Randi Schmelzer, somehow managed to find the time to answer our notorious questions. When not keeping her finger on the pulse of the world of public relations, Randi enjoys long walks on the beach, trying out new restaurants, and puppy wrestling. Turn-offs: mean people.

1. What newspapers do you read?
Los Angeles Times, LA Business Journal, New York Times, and parts of the Wall Street Journal, L.A. Daily News and NY Post. And the Cleveland Jewish News, so I know exactly whose bris, shower, wedding or funeral my parents have recently attended and feel the need to discuss at length.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? The Cleveland Jewish News, always. Passages like, “How else to celebrate the milestone 70th birthday of Mort Weisberg, well-known nursing-home mogul, than with a festive party?” were positively written for reading aloud.

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark?
PRWeek.com aside, way too many: MB’s FishBowlLA and AgencySpy, LA Observed, Gridskipper, Ray Richmond’s Past Deadline and Virginia Heffernan’s Screens blogs, Radar Online, Failure mag, BlatherWatch, Egotastic, RoadFood.com … and my very favorite, Snopes.

4. Where do you get your car washed?
I try to mix it up as much as possible, because I like to see what sorts of one-of-kind treasures are available in each facility’s attached gift shop. (Any suggestions?)

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? I do know his first name, but how could I not? Aren’t all dentists supposed to have a wall in the waiting room labeled with huge, cardboard cut-out letters reading, “Dr. Dan’s Zero-Cavity Club”? Or whatever his/her first name is. Underneath, there are those Polaroid snapshots of grinning patients cuddling an oversized stuffed tooth. Maybe it’s just my dentists.

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Jesse Thorn is the creator of The Sound of Young America, which has nothing to do with Up With People!. As his website says,

Think of it like Conan O’Brien on public radio, or “Fresh Air,” but more fun.

Or think of it as Terry Gross on mescaline. A grad of UC Santa Cruz, Thorn lives in Koreatown where he blogs, produces his show, and obviously agonized over our carefully crafted questions. (If we were really clever, there’d be a podcast. Sigh.)

1. What newspapers do you read? The only actual physical newspaper I get is Current, the industry rag for public media. I read the New York Times online a lot, along with the San Francisco Chronicle’s sports section for a Giants fix.

Reading the NYT (and the New Yorker) is a contractual thing for us public radio personalities… there are pop quizzes, and you can actually lose your show if you don’t remember the subject of Frank Rich’s last column or whatever.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? I actually read everything out loud as slowly and clearly as I can (to practice my gravitas).

3. Which Web sites (besides FBLA)are on your favorites bookmark? Bloglines, for the quajillion blogs and news feeds I read compulsively. I love Boing-Boing and Ask Metafilter, and the Apiary family of comedy blogs particularly. A couple of forums–my site’s, where I mingle with my really cool smart interesting listeners, Okayplayer.com, where I argue about rap music, and aspecialthing.com, where I talk about comedy with fellow comedy super-nerds. A couple of sites of questionable legality, where I make up for the fact that I don’t have cable. The usual, in other words.

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Graphic artist, digital muralist and downtown denizen Ed Fuentes blogs at View From a Loft and Blog Downtown. Fuentes put down his camera long enough to answer our illuminating questions.

1. What newspapers do you read?
Los Angeles Times, New York Times, Daily Variety, and to catch up on the hometown, Riverside Press-Enterprise.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? Millenium is a word that I still can’t say without a verbal backspace.

3. Which Web sites (besides FBLA) are on your favorites bookmark? LAO, Blogdowntown, photography blog jmcolberg.com, MediaBistro’s unbeige, and SPARCmurals.org

4. Where do you get your car washed? Little Tokyo Car Wash on 1st St just east of Alameda.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? Richard. And he’s been calling. I’m overdue.

6. Do you believe newspapers are going to die? If so, when? Not in our lifetime. There’s a certain romance with print, and the dwindling audience will return when some adjustments are made in a newspapers narrative.

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Adult entertainment entrepreneur Kevin Blatt has devoted his life to the selling of hotness. And if anyone is wondering why FBLA asked him to answer our fabled foolish questions, check out #9.

1. What newspapers do you read? I read the NY Times, LA Times, Variety and the Cleveland Plain Dealer mostly for the obituaries.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? None of them, my reading comprehension skills are pretty good )

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark? I enjoy reading mediabistro.com, huffingtonpost.com, cnn.com and my favorite, of course, is Lukeisback.com

4. Where do you get your car washed?
Beverly Hills, there is no better people watching in the world than at a Beverly Hills car wash.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? Michael, I think.

6. Do you believe newspapers are going to die? If so, when? Newspapers will never die, they are like adult bookstores, people will always want to see, touch, and taste the news-not to mention newspapers are made to clean windows with–they don’t streak glass.

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Jason Toney, in his own words, was once the editor of LAist and a b-level blogebrity. Now, he’s a senior producer at Disney.com. Toney’s own blog, Negro Please is famous for music recommendations. And he’s everywhere, Twitter, SXSW, Linkedin. But, no matter where he is, he made time for our foolish, yet curiously revealing, questions.

1. What newspapers do you read? Well, I keep forgetting to cancel my LA Times subscription. Does that count?

2. Which ones do you move your lips while reading? I’m part of the digerati, so you know I click on Salon and Slate and Alternet links but I truly get all my news from youtube kidz. Lip-dubbing “Crazy” counts, right?

3. Which Web sites, besides FBLA, are on your favorites bookmark? Popmatters and Disney.com (plug) and Go Fug Yourself (plug)

4. Where do you get your car washed? I’ve decided not washing my car is good for the environment.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? No, but it’s Armenian and hard to spell.

6. Do you believe newspapers are going to die? If so, when? No, but the paperless newspaper is what’s happenin’.

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Caricaturist and artist Roman Genn, has a talent for stirring up trouble. Arrested 9 times back in the USSR, his work has proved equally provocative here. Genn, who’s actually a fun-loving and genial guy, despite the poison he uses for ink, put down his glass long enough to answer our irrelevant questions.

1. What newspapers do you read? None. I just pile them on by my front door to prevent ants from escaping.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? The ones that contain any of my modest renderings.

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark? Irancartoon.com. I like to keep myself updated on the latest Zionist bestialities, the search for the 12th imam concerns me as well; his family is quite worried, you know.

4. Where do you get your car washed? The rain does an excellent job, wouldn’t dare to compete with Nature.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? Yep. And you should see the sadness in her eyes every time she sees what she has to work with.

6. Do you believe newspapers are going to die? Absolutely, they should just keep squeezing good journalists out to expedite the process. I’m surprised people still purchase the papers, given the abundance of the quality toilet paper in this country. If so, when? Hm…it will be Saturday…no, Thursday.

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Publicist Sabina Gault is with hot shop Ink PR Group ,was born in Romania, speaks five languages, has a magna from UC Berkeley, and loves mythical animals. She also seems entirely too truthful to be just another flack, as is evidenced by her answers to our oh-so-revealing questionnaire. Her clients must love her.

1. What newspapers do you read? LA Times, NY Times, and anything else I need to, should I have a client in them.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? None

3. Which Web sites, besides FBLA, are on your favorites bookmark? Dailycandy, fabsugar, gossip sites, cnn.com, nytimes.com, latimes.com, imdb.com, whorerepresents.com, etc.

4. Where do you get your car washed? Downstairs in my building–they do a fabulous job.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? Of course. I am having dinner with her and her fiancee this upcoming weekend. She came to my wedding–she’s fabulous.
(FBLA has to interject: look at that smile.)

6. Do you believe newspapers are going to die? If so, when? No, I don’t think so. I think it’s just hard to get the actual paper when you have the internet. But in weekends, reading the paper is one of my favorite activities. Sitting with your eyes in the computer all the time is so unhealthy.

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Downtown advocate, gad-fly or whatever he is, Brady Westwater is the LA Cowboy. Since we’re moving into his neighborhood, we tried to get on his good side, but he was wise to our tricks. So, lookin’ for 8 right out of the gate*, here’s Westwater’s answers.

1. What newspapers do you read?

LA Times, New York Times, Downtown News, LA Weekly, City Beat, Daily News, and Rodeo News plus the LA Business Journal, Journal of the Arts & Wall Street Journal if I can score a free copy.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading?

Cowboys don’t move our lips unless food or sex is involved. But if we did – it would be the NYT’s editorial page and LAT’S West magazine.

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark?

Fishbowl LA & NY, MissSnark, LAObserved, the Curbs, Kausfiles, and DrudgeReport plus any site with naked cowgirls on it

4. Where do you get your car washed? Cowboys don’t have cars. Cowboys ride horses.

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? If I need a tooth pulled, I use a horse, a saddle and a rope.

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Foreign correspondent, Emmanuelle Richard contributes to French daily Liberation,Swiss public radio and French Vogue. She blogs, she’s clever, and has that effortless French chic but a wicked sense of humor about the world, show biz and Los Angeles. We’re overjoyed she answered our questions.(And a word to all future 20 Questioners–she sent us all the URLs, saving us hours of valuable time.)

1. What newspapers do you read?

The New York Post, first thing in the morning since they started delivering in L.A. a few years ago. I wish I could say the L.A. Times (where her husband works) but I love too much starting the day laughing out loud or shouting: “Good Lord!” You have a sense that the people there have a blast hunting for stories, producing the pages and coming up with insane headlines. And you grow so fond of the gallery of characters, apart from the many unpleasant anti-European columnists. Then I grab the L.A. Times, starting with the Opinion section. I also check the website of the national daily paper I work for in France, the left-leaning Liberation.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? You mean, when you silently mutter WTF? More often than not, the LAT, especially when they feel the need to rephrase a paragraph three times in one story that could easily be 30% shorter. To be fair, my hometown paper also induces a lot of silent “WOW”s, and I often end up defending it in conversations in L.A. where trashing the LAT seems like a requisite sport. Coming from France where investigative journalism is as foreign as tofu, I feel very lucky to have the LAT.

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Former reporter Denise Hamilton, soignee and slinky, writes the Eve Diamond mystery novels, blogs at LAObserved, edited Los Angeles Noir and yet managed to find time to play our dirty little game.

1. What newspapers do you read? LA Times and Sunday NYT

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading I’m moving my lips right now as I read your e-mail.

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark? laobserved, the elegant variation, confessions of an idiosyncratic mind, neilgaiman.com cuz I love his musings about writing, FBLA

4. Where do you get your car washed? The rain

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? He retired. know any good ones?

6. Do you believe newspapers are going to die? If so, when? I’m an optimist. If all else fails we’ll always have the penny dreadfuls.

7. What was the last book you read?
Some Georges Simenon Maigret detective novels. They’re set in Paris in the 1950s and really capture that era and make me want to eat croissants and have a marc brandy (not together).

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Molly Freedenberg is the associate culture editor at the San Francisco Bay Guardian, and the chronicler of the Jerry Roberts roast, up in Santa Barbara. She graciously answered our infamous questions, which she probably forgot about the minute she moved to the Bay area.

1. What newspapers do you read?
L.A. Times, N.Y. Times, L.A. Weekly, S.F. Bay Guardian

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? none

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark? FBLA, of course, www.thesuperficial.com, www.myspace.com

4. Where do you get your car washed?
The self-wash place on Temple and Glendale

5. Do you know your dentist’s first name? nope

6. Do you believe newspapers are going to die? If so, when? No, but I think they’ll worry about it forever.

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Freelancer and Irishman Peter McQuaid joined us just in time for St. Pat’s.

1. What newspapers do you read? The L.A. Times, The NY Times, WWD, The Guardian and if I’m feeling really masochistic, The Washington Post.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading? I don’t move my lips while reading the paper, I’m too busy gnashing my teeth and screeching out loud about either: the news itself, the lameness of the reporting, or my annoyance that someone besides me got the assignment.

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark? FBLA, because if there’s anything LA needs, it’s some non-Hollywood gossip, and I’m not being facetious. Rawstory.com, Fleshbot, Radar, Al Jazeera, and dudesnude.com because I’m single.

4. Where do you get your car washed? This place on Vermont–It’s really cool, they have a car stereo place in back and I always go in there and fantasize that someday, I will get my Pathfinder painted Emergency Red and outfit it with a really phat sound system. It is my dream to be a playa…

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1. What newspapers do you read?
I don’t actually read any newspapers right now, because I’m real busy. But I do glance! Haha. I take a good glance at The LA Times, sometimes USA Today. I also visit news sites.

2. Which ones do you move your lips to while reading?
I think I read too fast for moving my lips simultaneously.

3. Which Web sites are on your favorites bookmark?
As far as celeb gossip goes, I’m a sucker for People’s website and TMZ. But some of my fave bloggers are Evil Beet and Seriously? OMG! WTF?.

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