Anna Nicole Smith is finally getting her funeral today in the Bahamas, according to TMZ. Her mother, Virgie Arthur tried to stop the proceedings, but a Bahamanian judge threw out her petition, and the tricked-out white hearse decorated with pink ribbons and feathers rolled on. Smith, dressed in a tiara and pink gown, will be buried next to her son. Slash, of Guns ‘n Roses was sighted among the congregation at the church.

TGIF: A Florida judge says he’ll issue a decision Friday in the icky and on-going Anna Nicole Smith case.

Virtually Ridiculous: Angry at the way things are going in Second Life, some “residents” have formed an army. We would’ve just turned off our computers and gone outside. But that’s just us.

And This Man Wants To Run The LAT? David Geffen gets ugly. OK. Uglier.

Anna Nicole Smith coverage has gone from the ridiculous to the just plain gross, with TMZ.com showing photos of the dead woman’s refrigerator.

While Entertainment Tonight pays Howard K. Stern a reported $1 million for his “story,” E! Online and others have their head in the sands of the Bahamas, following Stern’s battle over 5-month-old ATM, er, girl Dannielynn.

Thank goodness for the steady, staid voice of establishment print media, which would never stoop to put this scoop on A1.

Oops.

Caryn James in the NYT takes the media to task for gawking at Anna Nicole Smith — both in life and in death. Then she goes on to basically blame Anna Nicole for being too tantalizing not to watch: “Her sense of how to court attention was simply to show up, pose and practically say, ‘Come get me, use me.’”

Tim Rutten’s mea culpa in the LAT is a little better. In it, he explains how newspaper editors use the number of “hits” a story gets on their Web sites when determining story placement for the next day’s paper.

But he loses us at the end when he suggests journalists should use this case to reconsider this popularity contest approach, saying, “It’s a good moment for American newspapers to take a reflective breath to consider just how they want to play this numbers game — or, more important, whether they want to play it at all. If that were to occur, then Anna Nicole Smith would not have died in vain.”

Good point, Rutten. We’re sure Anna Nicole would have gone whistling to her grave, had she known her demise would restore journalistic integrity.

The L.A. Superior Court judge presiding over an emergency hearing in the Anna-Nicole Smith paternity case this morning barred journalists from the courtroom. But that didn’t stop one enterprising TV journo from sneaking inside. Would the journo get the scoop?

Nope.

A tattle-tailing Access Hollywood producer alerted the bailiff to the boob-tube interloper and got his butt bounced. Our spies tell us she then called her editor and boasted, “I totally outed him to the bailiff.”

And they said journalistic competition in this town was dead.

Meta-News Story: The LAT covered the Anna Nicole Smith death the way you’d expect — with a breaking news story that appeared online yesterday and a few timelines slapped up to fill space. But check out the rail on the far right of the Web-version of the story. Under “Related Articles,” the LAT lists a Wikipedia entry for the late actress/model. Is this was Stephen Colbert meant by Wikiality?

Timing Is Everything: Tribune Co. should have tried to auction itself into oblivion a few years ago, when the TV-buying market was hot. Now, it’s like a house in one of those “up-and-coming” neighborhoods in L.A. that never up and went anywhere.

Norman Lear For President: Seriously. We love him.

Did Anna Nicole Smith die from those weight loss drugs, or more recreational ones? Or was someone who spent most of her life as a circus freakshow doomed to die this young?

We asked the people responsible, those who helped catapult this buxom bundle of tragedy into fame, to shed some light. But all we got back were press releases.

From E! came this boilerplate statement:

“E! Networks is deeply saddened by the tragic news of Anna Nicole Smith’s death. Our thoughts are with her family and loved ones.”

From Hugh Hefner (courtesy of <a href="http://www.mediabistro.com/

fishbowlny/pop_culture/hugh_hefner_on_anna_nicole_she_was_a_dear_friend_52777.asp#email”>FBNY):

“I am very saddened to learn about Anna Nicole’s passing. She was a
dear friend who meant a great deal to the Playboy family and to me
personally. My thoughts and prayers are with her friends and loved
ones during this difficult time.”

Anna Nicole Smith died of heart failure in a Florida hotel. TrimSpa might as well file Chapter 11 right now. Smith was named in a class-action suit filed against the diet pill company.

The paternity of Smith’s 5-month-old daughter had been unsettled, and now custody could be equally as confused. Smith’s son, Daniel, died in September, 2006.

Smith had gone from being a topless dancer to a Playboy Playmate, marrying an 89 year old millionaire along the way. Upon his death, his heirs tried to keep her from inheriting any significant part of the estate. She was awarded $474 million by a California federal court,but that judgement was overturned.

The U.S. Supreme Court revived her case, ruling that federal courts in California could deal with her case despite a Texas state court ruling that her stepson, E. Pierce Marshall, was the sole heir to the estate. Marshall died last June, but his family vowed to continue to the court fight.

FBLA recalls a producer of her E! reality series saying

All America wants for Anna Nicole is for her to lose weight and get the money. And then spend it.

Sadly, she lost the weight and got the money. But she didn’t live to spend it.

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