The spectacularly tawdry (and sad) scandal currently enveloping Randy Quaid and wife Evi north of the 49th parallel is a headline writer’s dream or nightmare. A dream if the bold-font artisan is working for a celebrity tabloid publication-website and a nightmare if said writer is part of a more staid outlet trying to grab a fare share of the Internet traffic.

With that in mind, here is an early Monday morning PT look at some of our favorite Quaid slugs so far.

Ambitious: Are Hollywood Celebrities Being Murdered? Randy Quaid Thinks So

Dumb: Hurray For Randy Quaid! He’s Mental And Thinks People Want To Kill Him!

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