These People Aren’t Whittier Than Anywhere Else…

Can the Octuplet’s Mom make Whittier look any worse?
( polls)

The unemployed, single, artificially plumped and inseminated mother of a baker’s dozen plus one of babies, Nadya Suleman is from the little Quaker town of Whittier. It’s the place so rancid and backwoods that it warped Richard Nixon‘s mind by making him feel inferior when comparing himself to the non-Whittierites with all their fancy book learning and teeth keepin’ in Washington.

Whittier was Nixon’s Wasilla.

Therefor Whittier is responsible for Watergate.

And we all know Watergate is responsible for every political scandal for the rest of time having a -gate suffix.

Just so we know whom to blame.

MEDIABISTRO EVENTS

Get Social Media Marketing Secrets from Experts

Create a social media strategy, launch your campaign, and track the results in our Social Media Marketing Boot Camp starting February 16. The online event and workshop will feature speakers including The Onion‘s Baratunde Thurston (left), Facebook’s Morin Oluwole, and bitly’s Tim Devane. Register now.