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Darwin Was Right

Harold Camping ‘Flabbergasted’ Rapture Didn’t Come: Still Worth $117 Million

This past Sunday–the day after the rapture was supposed to hit and God would destroy the universe–Family Radio fraudster Harold Camping gave an interview to the San Francisco Chronicle, claiming he was “flabbergasted” by the lack of end times.

“It has been a really tough weekend,” he told the reporter.

Yeah, really tough we’re sure. His Family Radio network was worth $22 million in 2002. It was worth $117 mil in 2008. God knows how much Camping cashed in for in the days leading up to the fake rapture. Camping has been the source of a lot of mockery in the press for his poor apocalyptic prediction skills. Reporters seem to be missing the point. Camping has been laughing all the way to the bank for the better part of two decades, since his first doomsday prediction back in 1994.

We think this rage comic puts it better than most of the writing we’ve seen on the topic.

Doomsday: It’s the Gay’s Fault

Family Radio attention whore Harold Camping must be pretty happy right now. His prediction that the world will end tomorrow is the most trending topic in the universe right now. And he’s using all that attention to…blame gay people for the end of the world. The growing global gay civil rights movement, you see, is actually a sign of the apocalypse.

Naturally then, when Sunday rolls around and God isn’t in the midst of destroying the universe and torturing the sinners, that’s His way of telling us gay people are alright after all. Right, Harold Camping?

Can’t wait to tune in to Family Radio to find out.

Stuff To Do This Weekend: May 21st Post-Rapture Looting

As we’ve told you about before on this site, the end of days is coming. This Saturday to be precise. At least according to Family Radio media media mogul/cult guru Harold Camping. Jesus will come to take the true-believers to heaven, while the rest of us will be left to die a horrible, fiery death on Earth.

So, for all you Jews, Muslims, atheists, Hindus, Buddhists animists, Scientologists…and general sinners out there, how about some post-rapture looting? You won’t be alone. According to the “Post rapture looting” Facebook page that sprang up a couple of days ago, it looks like nearly 400,000 folks plan to hit up their local grocery and high-end stereo stores with their shotguns in tow.

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California Family Radio Doomsday Craziness Spreads Across America

Pack your bags everyone. Because in 10 days Jesus is coming to take you on a trip. To hell.

So says Harold Camping, anyway, the 89-year-old leader of the Oakland-based cult/media empire Family Radio, which operates on 66 stations across the country–36 in California alone. Camping says he’s used numbers in the bible to figure out the end of the world will begin on May 21st of this year. And, apparently, according to the above video, people across the country believe him.

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Jon Cryer Responds to Charlie Sheen’s Verbal Attack

The volatile Charlie Sheen has gained plenty of press lately for attacks on his bosses, his wives, and various female companions, but his vitriol didn’t stop there. He recently went after his Two and a Half Men costar Jon Cryer, calling him “a turncoat, a traitor, a troll.”

Cryer appeared on Conan last night to respond to the insults.

‘Family Radio’ Doomsday Cult Coming To Los Angeles

Has anyone else noticed the billboards all over town that promise the end of the world is coming on May 21st? We’ve seen two already: one in Glendale and the other on Alvarado near Sunset. Well, we just got the scoop on what’s going on. As it turns out, Jesus is coming back to slaughter the disbelievers. And he’s coming soon. How do we know? We heard it on the radio. “Family Radio” to be exact–an Oakland-based doomsday Christian cult run by 89-year-old Harold Camping that somehow has the cash to operate on 36 stations in California alone, including KFRN 1280 in Long Beach.

Aside from their radio enterprise and taking out billboards, a group of 10 Family Radio cultists is currently traveling around the country, spreading the “good news” in person. Their caravan will be coming to Los Angeles this coming Monday to tell us about the giant earthquake that’s going to kill the righteous and send them to heaven, while the rest will be stuck on Earth in the bloody aftermath for 153 days of ‘death and horror.’

Can’t wait!

We’re sure the news of the horrible earthquake and tsunami in Japan will only fuel their fire.

Big Government Publishes New Planned Parenthood Sting Video

Live Action founder Lila Rose has published a new–once again, highly suspect, highly edited–video on Andrew Breitbart‘s Big Government site, purporting to show Planned Parenthood workers in Virginia helping a “pimp” to circumnavigate the law to get abortions for his underage prostitutes.

Writes Rose:

Young girls are going into Planned Parenthood clinics every day, too many the victims of abuse. According to the Department of Justice, an estimated 300 to 400 thousand children are trafficked for sex every year.

Some are taken to Planned Parenthood clinics for secret abortions. Instead of reporting the abusers of minors and young women, Planned Parenthood is enabling pimps and predators with their refusal to report abuse and willingness to assist the pimp’s underage prostitution business.

Yuh, huh…

Well, that’s the biggest bullshit we’ve seen in quite some time. If what Rose says is true, then, as a journalist, the natural thing to do would be to find several of these trafficked girls and tell their stories. Then you send reporters out undercover to corroborate the girls’ stories. Instead of, you know, making the whole thing up.

This new video could not be edited in a more patchwork fashion. It reminds us of one of those Arnold Schwarzenegger soundboard phony phone calls.

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Vegas Columnist Has a Ball at Lingerie Bowl Media Day

If Sunday’s pay-per-view halftime Lingerie Bowl match-up between the LA Temptation and Philadelphia Passion is anywhere near as entertaining as Las Vegas Review-Journal columnist Ron Kantowski‘s take on Wednesday’s media day, beer bellied Lingerie Football League fans will definitely get their money’s worth.

This is the first time the event has been held in Sin City, a place Kantowski notes is the next best thing to goal posts being erected at the Playboy Mansion grotto. He also gets a kick out of the fact that the over-under betting line for the game, 36 ½, “curiously coincides” with the physical attributes of the Temptation’s offensive line.

Very few people in the LA media, sports or otherwise, can probably name the quarterback of the Temptation. She is Ashley Salerno (pictured), and Kantowski thinks there’s still time for her to catch the eye of a certain NFL soul mate.

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Us Weekly Cover With Elton John’s Baby Too Controversial for Arkansas

Ooohh boy. Apparently Us Weekly‘s most recent cover, featuring Elton John posed with husband and son, is too much for customers of the popular Arkansas chain store Harps. The store had to install a “family shield” in front of the cover to protect children from seeing THE GAYS!!!

In fairness, it doesn’t sound like the store took the initiative on this one. The website CoverAwards called the cashier at the Harps store in question, who said customers had been complaining about the cover, demanding something be done.

“We’re in a no win situation,” she said, adding she thought it was ridiculous that anyone would complain. “They’re going to have to know at some point [about gay families].”

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Columnist Details Sexcapade with Top Chef Player and Personal Assistant

Wow. That’s all we can say after reading today’s TheFrisky.com recollection by Rachel Kramer Bussel (pictured) of a romantic assignation in Los Angeles that went off the rails.

She doesn’t name the person involved, or his female assistant. But apparently, the dude, who appeared on the reality TV show Top Chef, took a fancy to her and brought along his female assistant for all portions of the date. Including the part where Mr. Wrong stripped down naked, took a shower and then hopped into the hotel room bed with the still-dressed Bussel.

I still couldn’t quite believe he was so blasé about having his assistant right there. Were they together? Was he trying to engineer a threesome?… It was so surreal, we could’ve been on a sitcom…

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