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Latest Knicks Loss Has Reporter Reaching for His Eagles Greatest Hits CD

The first thing New York Daily News Knicks beat writer Frank Isola did after the team’s disheartening Sunday night loss to the Pelicans was try and process the numbness in his game report.

NYDNIsolaKnicksHeadline

Here’s Isola’s lede:

James Dolan always believed this Knicks team would make history and he was right. These Knicks now hold the franchise record for futility at Madison Square Garden, the newly transformed MSG, that is.

And here’s his third paragraph:

The numbers are downright staggering: nine straight losses overall and a franchise-record seven in a row at the Garden. Who knows, maybe the Knicks will never win again.

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LA Kings Anthem Features Strange View of the Weather

Have you caught “We Are Los Angeles,” the new ditty put forth this NHL playoff season by the LA Kings? It’s from The Goon Squad and features the following lyric: “In any weather, a Kings, a King forever.”

Hmmm. Not sure about you, but every time FishbowlLA has hit STAPLES Center for a game, it’s been pretty much the same weather. Maybe The Goon Squad is singing about when the team is on the road, but then, that doesn’t really jive with a song about why the team is synonymous with LA.

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A Rolling Stones Song List for Lakers Fans

There was zero satisfaction Sunday at STAPLES Center. A day after the Rolling Stones ran through their customary pre-arena-tour small club show at The Echoplex, the black-and-blue purple and gold mercifully kissed a miserable 2012-13 season goodbye.

In honor of this weekend’s intersection of “45 & Stinking” (Lakers) with “50 & Counting” (Stones), we’ve compiled a very special song list. This one’s a little different than the one Mick jumped through Saturday night, but for die-hard Lakers fans, it’s the only one that makes sense:

“Sad Sad Sad”
“The Worst”
“Stop Breaking Down”
“Shattered”
“Out of Tears”
“Rock and a Hard Place”
“Doom and Gloom”
“Dear Doctor”
“Biggest Mistake”
“It’s All Over Now”

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Sportswriters Running Out of Words to Describe Kobe Bryant’s Senior NBA Citizen Feats

Last fall, Sports Illustrated and most other experts promised us a 2012-13 Lakers rose garden. Last night, at the end of a season that has turned out instead to be all about the thorns, Kobe Bryant willed his team to victory at Portland’s Rose Garden.

Bryant is doing things at age 34 that most NBA players ten years younger can only dream of. Even Mr. Hockey Gordie Howe, who just turned 85, is probably shaking his head over last night’s 113-106 one-man show.

So how are sportswriters describing Bryant’s season-high draining of 47 points in a place where the team usually gets stomped? Take your pick: “implausible” (LA Times); “epic” (ESPN Los Angeles); “thrilling” (Yahoo)…

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Shaq, Phil, Jeanie and Fellow Lakers ‘Superman’ Hang Out at HuffPost Live

This was anything but the usual HuffPost Live Google+ hangout. Ahead of tonight’s retiring of Shaquille O’Neal‘s Lakers jersey at Staples Center, host Marc Lamont Hill welcomed Shaq, Phil Jackson, Jeanie Buss and (a little later into the conversation) Kurt Rambis. Before O’Neal, Rambis also famously earned the nickname “Superman” from Chick Hearn.

There’s no better way to get in the mood for tonight’s induction ceremony (or follow it up later) than by watching this half-hour conversation. You know it’s a good HuffPost Live segment when one of the network’s other hosts, Jacob Soboroff, chimes into the chat room with, “One of the great HPL interviews. Well done.”

A favorite part for us was when Buss reacted to Shaq’s first set of comments, explaining that she had never heard the story of what Jerry West told #34 when The Big Newcomer first joined the purple and gold. The story magically ties into what is scheduled to transpire at Staples tonight.

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Matt Kemp Travels to Sesame Street

Los Angeles Dodgers outfielder Matt Kemp is the latest local athlete to pay a visit to Sesame Street, appearing on the iconic children’s show Thursday.

And since the kid inside of you is wondering, the word of the day was attach.

As in I hope the surgeon who performed offseason shoulder surgery on Kemp made sure to attach it back to his body.

[H/T Big League Stew]

Former Super Agent Leigh Steinberg Celebrates Three Years of Sobriety

According to an interview by AP sports writer Bernie Wilson, it was exactly three years ago on March 21, 2010 that former high-flying pro sports agent Leigh Steinberg officially stopped pounding back the vodka. What that means is that many better things lie ahead in 2013, including hopefully completing an autobiography and regaining NFL Players Association certification as a talent representative.

Steinberg is also in the process of soliciting financing for another Newport Beach sports agency. All in all, the man forever associated with Tom Cruise’s character in Jerry Maguire is authoring a gridiron-worthy comeback story:

On Saturday, friend and business partner Richard Gillam will throw a party to celebrate Steinberg’s three years of sobriety and his real birthday, which is next Wednesday.

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Bill Walton Goes Bill Walton During Broadcast

What happens when you give a loose cannon like Bill Walton a live mic in Las Vegas?

A couple of cringe-worthy moments for the suits at ESPN.

Walton was calling Oregon vs. Washington at the Pac-12 tournament Thursday night and dropped a couple of broadcasting bombs that had Twitter buzzing.

First up, Walton on Ray Lewis:

Walton is making a reference to Lewis’ 2000 arrest following a Super Bowl party in Atlanta. The retired linebacker officially joined ESPN as an analyst on Wednesday. Maybe the murder joke was just hazing on Walton’s part? Welcome to ESPN, Ray.

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Kobe Bryant Vents About Ankle Injury

 

Just when you thought this season couldn’t get any worse for the Los Angeles Lakers, Kobe Bryant suffered a sprained left ankle in the final seconds of Wednesday’s 96-92 loss to the Atlanta Hawks and is out indefinitely.

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Clipper Accused of Murder After Sick Dunk

If you haven’t seen it by now, Los Angeles Clippers center DeAndre Jordan had the dunk of the year Sunday night vs. Brandon Knight and the Detroit Pistons.

The dunk was so vicious that not only did Twitter explode, but so did Jordan’s Wikipedia page. According to the Wiki, Jordan was charged for murder after his actions at Staples Center:

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