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Scary SoCal Headlines

Our Vote for Funniest LA Weekly April Fool’s Gag Goes to…

Ha ha. If you click right now onto LA Weekly, the Angeleno world we all know and often dread has been completely upended.

Our personal favorite is the one on the right. According to item author Eve Weston (a comedy writer who occasionally contributes to the alt-weekly), WeHo politicians met unusually on a Sunday night to implement big changes for Santa Monica Blvd.:

In the press release addressing the ban, it was noted that “residents’ well being” was an important consideration in bringing the ban into law, in addition to the recently adopted notion of “vision pollution.” Council member John D’Amico explained, “If government has the right to curb noise pollution by limiting the volume and discordance of sounds in the city, it likewise should have the right to limit ugliness and tackiness. Vision is hardly a lesser sense than hearing.”

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Four Out of Five New Yelp Reviewers Do Not Recommend Staying at Cecil Hotel

Some inevitable updating has occurred on the Yelp page for the Cecil Hotel, the downtown LA $65-a-night joint now forever branded as the establishment where a corpse was discovered in the rooftop water tank. A male jokester in Charleston, MA – via a post that will surely soon be deleted – today gives the destination five stars:

Very helpful staff, any and all questions were answered in a timely fashion. “Do you have running water?” “Of corpse we do” WAKA WAKA WAKA!

Otherwise, this gruesome news event had three folks from LA and one from Arkansas all chiming in February 20 with various degrees of one-star horror. One local simply cut and pasted a CNN report about the latest aspects of the missing traveler case, including the now-confirmed detail that the water tank was a source of H2O for hotel guests.

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Rogue LAPD Cop Christopher Dorner Sent Package to Anderson Cooper

Rogue LAPD cop Christopher Dorner, who is currently wanted for the murder of no less than three people in Southern California, certainly had plenty of thoughts about various pop culture and media figures in his online manifesto. He apparently felt strong enough about Anderson Cooper, however, to send him a personal note.

More details from Cooper after the jump:

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Newspaper Delivery Women Shot During Manhunt for Killer Cop

Terrible news out of Torrance today as two women were shot by LAPD this morning as they were delivering newspapers.*

From the LA Times:

The women, shot in the 19500 block of Redbeam Avenue, were taken to area hospitals, Torrance police Lt. Devin Chase said. They were not identified. One was shot in the hand and the other in the back, according to Jesse Escochea, who captured video of the victims being treated.

It was not immediately known what newspapers the women were delivering. After the shooting, the blue pickup was riddled with bullet holes and what appeared to be newspapers lay in the street alongside.

Police were in the neighborhood on the lookout for Christoper Jordan Dorner, a former LAPD officer who is accused of murdering an Orange County couple and shooting several police officers during his escape. Dorner is still at large.

No word yet on what newspaper the injured women worked for.*

*Update – 02/07/13: The women were delivering the LA Times.

Scary SoCal Headlines: ‘Hungry’ Transient, Dead Pelican

According to the LA Times, at 9:57 a.m. PT Thursday, this is the sad state of “L.A. Now:”

Transient allegedly killed pelican because he ‘was hungry’

The frightening story to go along with the above headline was written by USC alum Melissa Leu, sourced from City News Service. Though brief, the item paints a horrific picture of homelessness, possible mental illness and inexcusable animal cruelty.

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Scary SoCal Headlines: HuffPo LA vs. OC Register

Summertime… and the headlining is queasy. From the earliest days of the World Wide Web right on through to this morning, Matt Drudge and co. have proven how successful the right sensational Internet headline can be.

Here are two current, local examples of this art form. Which one fills you with more dread about the state of modern society?

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