At first, when we got the press release for The Ultimate Author, I thought somebody might have beaten me to the punch with the reality TV creative writing workshop concept on the air. Fortunately, closer inspection reveals that I don't have anything to worry about for now, as the "awesome television program packed with entertaining, engaging and interesting events" doesn't appear to be airing anywhere but on its own website. (I particularly enjoyed the scene in the "pilot" where the authors are judged on their ability to buy and arrange theme party table settings. Because that's a pretty important part of any writer's career.)

For that matter, a lot of the details are still pretty sketchy. So far, for example, all they're willing to say about the judges is that the roster will include "literary magazine editors, publishers, authors, agents, publicists, celebrities, journalists, and athletes." And what are these mysterious figures judging for? "The winner of The Ultimate Author will win a book deal," according to the press release. "They will work alongside industry professionals to promote their book and learn the trade for one year." A book deal with whom? Working alongside which industry professionals? I couldn't tell you for sure, but it's worth noting that executive producer Lauren Spicer also self-publishes African-American romances through a company called SpiceRackBooks. If nothing we say has scared you off yet, Spicer's scheduled a casting call for the Hilton Garden Inn in Ft. Lauderdale next month...