You have an opinion on everything, so naturally, you'd be a great critic, right? Well, maybe. It's hard to know where to begin: literally. Troy Patterson, art and entertainment writer and former Entertainment Weekly critic has some thoughts on the many ways to lead into your cultural criticism piece:

Where to begin?

In the inverted pyramid of a news article, the most important facts go at the top, and feature writers often want to start their stories with eye-catching scene-setters or intriguing quotes. But reviewers have can choose among a wide variety of effective ledes. Herewith, a small sampling.

Playing the title card. Beginning at the beginning--by playing off the very name of the work under review--can be a smart way of getting to
the bottom of things.

"The titlers of TV shows adore the word 'real.' Maybe they believe it distracts from the illusion of the medium. There's The Real World, Real Romance, Real TV, and, of course, nonstop televised reality. But what exactly is HBO implying when it calls its recurring triple-X documentary show Real Sex?" [Virginia Heffernan, Slate, August 8, 2002]

The nut graf in a nutshell. Here, the opening line points to the
general feel of the work and the main theme of the review.

"Jonathan Demme's The Silence of the Lambs is artful pulp--tabloid material treated with intelligence and care and a weird kind of sensitivity." [Terrence Rafferty, The New Yorker, February 25, 1991.]

The main-characterization. In a movie, TV, or theater review, you can jump-start a piece by defining the screen (or stage) presence of the
star.

"Alternately irritable and irritating, the paunchy, balding Paul Giamatti is so spirited in his distress and so recognizably human in his attributes that he bids to define a genre. There's Storytelling (in which he played a wheedling indie filmmaker), American Splendor (wherein his "Harvey Pekar" seemed more authentic than the real Pekar), and now Alexander Payne's superbly directed Sideways." [J.Hoberman, The Village Voice, October 18, 2000]

The figure head. In which the writer employs a vivid simile or
metaphor to describe the whole book (or movie or CD or…).

Russell Banks's Cloudsplitter, a novel of near-biblical proportions about the abolitionist freedom fighter John Brown, is shaped like an explosive with an exceedingly long and winding fuse. The bomb part, the part that explodes, is a compact, climactic account of Brown's famous raid on Harpers Ferry in 1859...." [Walter Kirn, The New York Times Book Review, February 22, 1998]

The concession stand. When presenting a contrarian idea or minority opinion, you sometimes want to pay respect to the established view before dropping the hammer:

"It's hard to hate Terms of Endearment. James Brooks's new film is so appealing, so unassuming and good-hearted, so funny, intelligent and well crafted, that to break its spell seems churlish, like knocking Christmas... But let's face it. Terms of Endearment is an obnoxious movie." [Peter Biskind, The Nation, January 14, 1984.]

Enough with the writing advice, you say. I want to know where and how to publish my arts criticsm! Sign up for Troy's class, then!