It's easier to interview subjects about some topics more than others. Their child? Yes. Their child going to juvie? No. Their doting husband? Yes. But their doting husband dying in a plane crash? No. However, sometimes you need to talk to a subject during a sad or trying time, even though you feel like a jerk.

There is no perfect way to go about this but it's important to maintain a combination of professionalism and humanity. Make it clear that you would like to ask some questions but it's perfectly all right to say "I'm so sorry for your loss..." or "This must be a difficult time for you..."

If you are speaking with the loved one of a recently deceased person, it may be easier for the interviewee if you ask him or her to describe the deceased and his or her life, interests, etc. One person I asked recommended beginning with "How would you like people to remember [name]?"

Don't try to force a person to talk with you. Be creative, though. If a parent or spouse can't talk, try other people close to them, like coworkers or neighbors. If you want to be especially frank with the person you're interviewing or make sure they don't feel like you're springing anything on them, say "I'm going to be asking you about X, Y, and Z, and I realize this is probably a sensitive topic for you. Is that OK?," as another MB user recommended, who also adds, "I also speak in a gentler voice than usual. This is a great time to be a really good listener, which of course will pay off in the quality of the interview you get."

If you're going to be interviewing someone regarding an incident that is being fairly widely covered, you might want to try a trick that another writer suggests. "Often, I would park on the opposite side of the street, so my driver's side is directly facing the front door of the victim's house. I'd roll down the window and wait. Most of the time, someone would come out of the house to ask what's going on. That is the family spokesman. Whomever the person is, if he or she has the presence of mind to notice you and come out to investigate, he also has the calmness to handle the media request-- and, hopefully, to convey your request to the immediate relatives."

Although what you're doing isn't the most fun thing to do, don't paint yourself as a villain, by saying anything like "I'm so sorry I have to do this to you..." etc. If a subject doesn't want to talk, they'll let you know. I haven't had very much experience in this arena but most of the time, the people I've interviewed have been more willing to talk than I'd expected (especially if the circumstances in question are something that people can learn from in the future.) And if somebody does turn on you, just remind yourself that they're upset, and also that you're just doing your job. For more tips, read Bob Steele's article on this topic on Poynter.