I was reading this topic on the mb bulletin boards a while ago, and realized that not all people know how to operate at networking events (or non-networking parties attended by people in your field where you're going to end up talking shop anyway. Like a mediabistro party!)

I asked the bubbly, friendly Rachel Sklar, HuffPost editor and former FishBowl NY blogger (and pal of mine) for her advice on how to hack it at an industry event without sweating it.

If you're naturally shy, think of a networking event this way, Rachel says. "Walking into a room of people you don't know is scary. Fortunately, it only lasts as long as it takes to start chatting with someone nice." She offers an icebreaking tip: "Be sure to have read the news that day. This way you can raise a current topic for discussion, or not feel stupid when someone else does."

How do you introduce yourself to somebody and make it seem relatively natural and friendly? "Generally speaking, it will seem natural and friendly if it actually is natural and friendly," says Sklar. "It's far more natural for two people to chat amiably while waiting for a drink at the bar than to stand stiffly next to each other studiously avoiding acknowledging each other's presence. If there is an opening gambit, use it - if someone is wearing great shoes, or has a cool bag or whatnot, feel free to say so. Everyone likes compliments as long as they're not weird or creepy. Just be nice. "

Of course, when you're at a professional event, you're there for professional reasons. How can you find more about somebody's occupation without looking like you're just digging for a possible contact? "Don't be nosy or pushy, just be interested and friendly - people like talking about themselves," says Sklar. "Be interested, and offer your own information. Don't dive right in with, 'So, what do you do and can you hire me?" - start with typical questions like how long they've been in X city, or how do they know so-and-so whose party it is - but it's not gauche to ask someone what they do (it is, however, gauche to ask someone how much they make)." (If you're a freelance writer, I've found that at networking events it's fine to ask, "Who do you write for?", or better yet, "What do you write?")

Sometimes, the conversation just isn't working, personally or professionally-how can you disengage without seeming abrupt? "Graceful extrication is easily accomplished with a member of the opposite sex by professing the need to visit the restroom - the one place they can't follow you (related tip: following someone to the bathroom does not constitute good networking), " says Sklar. "You can excuse yourself to check in with a friend, you can excuse yourself because you're expected elsewhere, you can excuse yourself to get another drink, you can excuse yourself by saying 'I just saw a friend that I completely spaced on calling back and I must go apologize profusely' or you can do what I do and leave the person in midsentence when the food comes out. Mmm, mini sushi is delicious."

There's nothing worse though than getting caught in the deadly conversation trap-unless you are doing it to somebody else. "If you are engrossed in conversation that is one thing but it is bad form to trap someone in a too-long conversation at an event," says Sklar. "Be aware of passing time and allow the person a graceful exit, like 'Oh, you're almost finished your drink, I don't want to keep you' - that's neutral enough for someone to either say 'Oh no, I'm good, I want to hear more about how fascinating and wonderful you are' or 'Actually, that's a good idea, it was great to meet you.'

Rachel Sklar offers some parting parting don'ts: "Don't get too drunk. That's uncomfortable for everyone and you'll look like an idiot. Don't trap anyone in conversation, don't cut in the drink line, don't touch anyone inappropriately (this includes light knee touches, elbow touches, and back touches if you've just met the person. And for the love of God, no arm-stroking. Ick). Don't repeatedly take cellphone calls unless you're expecting something important. You're not important enough to a stranger that she should have to stand there politely while you explain to a telemarketer that you're busy. Don't leer (though surreptitious gawking at very hot people is acceptable because it can hardly be avoided). Don't hover silently outside a circle of conversationalists - someone might not see you, or might be in the middle of a sentence. Let them finish and assert your presence - 'I'm just going to join in here, I'm so-and-so' - that makes it easy for them to continue their conversation without feeling awkward about the guy standing there uncertainly, and easy for you to stand there saying nothing but not feeling like a tool. If you wouldn't do any of this stuff anyway, don't worry. If you would, don't do it, and then don't worry. Life's too short, and the mini-sushis aren't going to eat themselves. Have fun!