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Tuesday Apr 01, 2008
Today in Press Release Speak
(image cred)
Press releases often contain ridiculously bad marketing speak. Nothing new there. But the first line in this press release really caught our eye:
Lumonall, Inc. (OTCBB: LUNL), a global purveyor of photoluminescent (glow-in-the-dark) emergency signage and guidance systems, is pleased to announce that it has retained strategic PR firm News North America. In business for over 25 years, News North America provides 100% guaranteed pick-up of media-requested, newsworthy content.
Really. 100% guaranteed pick-up of media-requested, newsworthy content. First, what does that even mean? Ok, so I'm a member of "the media." And I don't really care about glow in the dark emergency signage and guidance systems (at the moment, at least). So I guess they're down to 99.999999999% guaranteed pick-up of media-requested newsworthy content. Phew, glad we got that straight.
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