“NBC sinks too low for this talking head” is the headline on Ken Allard‘s latest column for the San Antonio Express-News.

Apparently disgusted by what he calls “the network’s precipitous retreat from journalistic and ethical standards,” he declares: “With great reluctance and best wishes to my former colleagues, with this column I am severing my 10-year relationship with NBC News.”

Except — he’s never had a formal relationship with NBC News! All his work has been on an appearance-by-appearance basis. “Mr. Allard is not under contract to NBC and hasn’t appeared on our air in nearly a year,” an NBC spokesperson said this afternoon. “In truth, there’s really nothing to sever.”