By Betsy Rothstein, Eddie Scarry and Peter Ogburn
We don’t know how Communications Consultant Ron Bonjean and his wife, Sara, do it. But each year they manage to invite the most unexpected washed up D-lister imaginable to their holiday party. This year that was Erik Estrada, who played a cop on the late 70s series “CHIPS” and himself on “Sabrina, The Teenage Witch.” People once named him one of the “10 Sexiest Bachelors in the World.” Some other standout roles: In 2009 he appeared in the blockbuster Husband for Hire starring Mario Lopez; in that same year he began showing up in Burger King commercials. Other regular staples at the Bonjean party: A drunken, homeless elf who does balloon tricks, lasagna, a vodka-laced ice luge and some kind of animal — this year it was a giant bunny mingling among guests. The drink of the evening was the “Fiscal Cliff.” As Bonjean described it, “It starts out smooth and then you get smashed.” If anyone smelled an overabundance of Drakkar Noir cologne, that was not the mime trailing NRSC Spokesman Brian Walsh around the party. That was actually Walsh, who was being followed all night by the mime and a second partygoer assigned to spraying him with cologne. House Maj. Leader Eric Cantor‘s Dep. Chief of Staff Doug Heye, who was tasked with the picking Estrada up from the airport, wasn’t likely responsible.
9:54 p.m. Undisclosed journo urinates in neighbor’s yard.
Hollywood on the Potomac blogger and publicist Janet Donovan spotted taking pictures of Estrada just inside the door. Party host Ron Bonjean, meanwhile, was decked out in a flamboyant purple blazer with large flowers that his wife had tailor made for him for the party.
10:18 p.m. Peter threatens that he and Eddie are going to rip some chunks out of the gingerbread house.
10:20 p.m. Partygoer: “Last time I saw this many ladies wearing sparkly clothes, I was at a strip club.”
10:25 p.m. Guy is seen wearing a sweater adorned with actual Christmas stockings. Peter: “Eddie has dared me to put a meatball in one. Challenge accepted.”
10:30 p.m. Partygoer Nick Massella is overheard discussing Sunday brunch. “The lemon pancakes are fucking amazing!”
10:54 p.m. There are a lot of ugly festive frocks — we won’t lie. We ask one male partygoer in holiday pants, “What’s on your pants?” He snipped, “Santas.” Then when we asked where he purchased them, he snapped that he bought them online. Clearly he wanted someone to ask about his pants and when they do, he acts like a bitch.
11:15 p.m. A drunken elf with white foam in the right hand corner of his mouth gives Peter, Eddie and I a semi-private show involving balloon toys. Eddie makes an obligatory condom joke. A drunken guest walks by and mentions Sean Spicer, the RNC Spokesman who is at the party. The elf eventually slurs, “I was just running my mouth. Who is Sean Spicer?” We explain as best as we can.
11:32 p.m. Former Washington Examiner reporter J.P. Freire is here with his girlfriend, Cat. He tells us he’s now self-employed. “So I’m not eating cat food,” he jokes. “I mean, I’m eating Cat’s food.” Sounds vaguely naughty.
11:40 p.m.: Overheard. Male partygoer with dark hair and scrunched face asks, “Who’s that guy on CNN who has the show and wears the stupid Ascot?” Actually, that would be CNN Contributor Roland Martin, who actually doesn’t have his own show on CNN but hosts “Washington Watch.”
11:45 p.m. Guy with palpable Cheetos breath walks by.
11:50 p.m. Man with hair that a partygoer has dubbed “the penis hairdo” is chatting up Estrada in the foyer. We ask, “Where did you get your hairdo?” He replies, “Why, should I give it back?”
11:55 p.m. Male guest tells Estrada he once dressed up as him for Halloween. He notes, “I think he was a little skeeved out.”
Midnight: Eddie takes picture of a gaggle of women. Woman asks, “Do I look thin?”
FNC’s Doug McElway is floating around. He says he likes covering national politics for Fox News. “Beats covering buckling children into car seats,” he says. McElway was fired by the ABC affiliate, WJLA-TV for insubordination and misconduct in Sept. 2010. (We try not to upset him.)
12: 21 a.m. Guy in bright, eyesore salmon blazer says he purchased it in Las Vegas. He shows off his matching orange socks. Turns out he’s Chad Barth, a “political events evangelist” for Eventbrite. “I like to represent the company,” he says, explaining that the company color is salmon. “You’re not going to say I’m drunk are you?”
12:30 a.m. RNC aide Tim Miller, former spokesman to Jon Huntsman, seen stuffing a near-empty cigarette pack with free cigarettes by the door. By the way, we love Miller and more importantly, he LOVES FishbowlDC even though his friends can’t stand it.
12:45 a.m. A different undisclosed partygoer reveals that he urinated on a neighbor’s lawn.
(Pictured above: On left: CNN’s Matt Dornic embracing Estrada. Note his newly purchased holiday sweater from Urban Outfitters. At right: Bonjean in purple flower-bombed blazer.)
See who showed up to the party as well as our lunatic picture gallery…