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Behold: The Social Media Sobriety Test

The routine is familiar: You come home wasted around 2 a.m. The babysitter complains about the time, so you don’t tip her ungrateful ass. It’s not your fault. Traffic was insane, and people were driving all crazy and stuff. The kids are asleep, dreaming their whimsical dreams of candy covered clouds and puppy mills. Quietly, you reach into the pantry, grab your emergency bottle of wine, sign on to Facebook and tell your friend that her new baby has a really big head. Like, really big. The thing’s gigantic. Someone needs to tell her. Maybe the thing needs medical attention, you don’t know. You then pass out, head against the keyboard, bottle of “Two Buck Chuck” still in hand.

Now, don’t you wish you could avoid these embarrassing drunk social media interactions? Luckily, Webroot’s “Social Media Sobriety Test” has you covered according to this spot from Boulder-based TDA. Now you don’t have to leave your friends guessing whether or not your status updates occurred while you were under the influence of alcohol. Whether it’s your friends, your boss, your kid’s parents or your parole office, now everyone knows that you’re “too intoxicated to post right now,” eliminating their investigation into your personal habits. Hey, you’re drunk. Might as well be honest about it.

Sure, Tony Ha might be upset because you lied about going out tonight. Whatever, the dude’s a buzzkill. If you’re not going to tell him, at least your software can on your behalf. The Social Media Sobriety Test: You Web-Savvy Drunk, You. Credits after the jump.

ACD/CW: Jeremy Seibold
AD: Neal Desai
Interactive Designer: Wes Schauble
CDs: Jonathan Schoenberg, Thomas Dooley

Programming: 14four, Spokane, Wa.
Project Mgr.: Molly Enkema
Lead Developer: Matt Tysor
Strategy Dir.: Ryan Moede

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