WaPo‘s Dana Milbank finally got around to schoolmarming The Daily Caller‘s Editor-in-Chief Tucker Carlson last night in an op-ed that compares Carlson to a Montana outhouse. And we all know what those are like, right? Not. Pretty. At. All.
Moving at a swift clip, Milbank takes his outhouse analogy, which semi-works but feels like a giant, awkward stretch of sticky pink taffy, and winds around to: Neil Munro should be fired, a point made repeatedly since Friday’s incident. He describes what Munro did as “outrageous” and “unprecedented.” Along the way, he blames conservatives for marring the way a large percentage of Americans now view the presidency. He cites a few polls revealing the low percentage of Americans who hold the office in high regard.
“Conservative leaders may believe it benefits them that one in six voters still thinks Obama is Muslim. But when conservatives sanction the debasement of Obama, they are debasing the presidency itself.”
But Milbank doesn’t complete his scolding by comparing Carlson to a public toilet scrawled with phony numbers to call first lady Michelle Obama, former Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Sec. of State Hillary Clinton “for a good time.” He takes his tough love to another level by telling Carlson that he has disappointed him, let him down. Who does Milbank think he is, Carlson’s MOTHER? Or worse, his life coach?
“That’s why my confidence in Tucker Carlson has dropped. I’ve liked him for years, even forgiving him his brief moment on ‘Dancing With the Stars.’ I have been impressed by his launch of the Daily Caller, a Web site with first-rate talent such as Matt Lewis. But now Carlson is turning the Daily Caller into the Daily Heckler.”
And finally the outhouse analogy comes full circle as Milbank writes about the stench inside an outhouse, which is really where all this was going. You can’t have an outhouse analogy and not discuss the smell. The only thing we might have added was flies.
“Heckling the president in the middle of a Rose Garden speech isn’t holding the president to account. It is belittling the presidency, and it smells just as bad as an outhouse in the Missoula summer.”
So let’s get this straight: Milbank writes an entire column blaming conservatives and pointedly Carlson for the debasing the office of the presidency and in the process debases Carlson by equating him to a crapper?
At this point what may be in the crapper is the relationship between the two newsmen. Despite the fact that Milbank spoke to Carlson for the column, Carlson says he hasn’t read it and won’t. “Like most people, I quit reading the Post a while ago,” he told FBDC. “So I haven’t seen it.”