We didn’t realize SNL’s Doug and Wendy Whiner had Washington relatives. But we’ve found one in Todd Kliman, Washingtonian‘s food and whine editor and restaurant critic who hosts a weekly Tuesday 11 a.m. chat.

During this week’s chat all we wanted to learn was where we could get three star cuisine at one star prices, as promised. But Kliman was busy complaining about his back. Would Kliman like some whine with his back pain?

We would privately sympathize with him. But why do we care about his back pain when we’re talking food and a potential incredible meal for peanuts?

“Good morning, everyone. Before we get too far into things … You usually come to me with the questions — today I’m coming to you with one: I threw out my back on Sunday, and am sort of cramped over typing this today. It’s not fun. Anyone have any suggestions for me?” Kliman asked readers. He annoyingly continued, “Any specific stretching exercises? A massage specialist or chiropractor you think is excellent? Over-the-counter drugs that provide some relief?” More…“It’s not that it’s painful so much as that I can’t fully extend, and so walking is a chore, and then of course everything else suffers because I’m sort of hunched as I go …Whatever you’ve got for me, I’d appreciate.”

Yes, and what we’d appreciate is to have that online food chat the magazine promised. Hey Editor Garrett Graff, here’s an idea: Spring for muscle relaxers so we can proceed with the food chat?

Most readers ignored Kliman’s request to find a solution to his back pain, but a few humored him. NoLo, DC: What, the Washingtonian doesn’t provide medical insurance?! Or is there some other excuse for suffering with your back for two days without plans to see a doctor?

Todd Kliman: To me, a doctor is always a last resort. For everything. I also never take a pill if I can help it. Now, if I hadn’t seen improvement since Sunday, then I’d probably start thinking today about making a call. Not making a call, but thinking about making a call. But I’m definitely better than I was.

(There’s a great message to Washingtonian readers: Avoid doctors.)

Silver Spring: I found the article below anti-inflammatory for over-the-counter med but you may want to make an appointment with your physician to have a prescription for muscle relaxant. [Read here.]

Our favorite came from a reader who wasn’t afraid to tell Kliman how “messed up” he is.

Arlington, VA: To your question: Find a Chiropractor. Massage is good when you aren’t completely messed up already but it sounds like you are. You need two things 1) Electro-stimulation which will help to release the muscles; and 2) adjustment to put you back in line. When I really screwed up my back a few years ago, it was the only thing that worked. I was a skeptic to start but the immediate relief from the electro-stym and the fact that the before and after x-rays showed that my spine was back where it belonged (and the long term relief it provided) totally changed my mind.