Smells Like Conservatives: Sunday Op-Ed stalwart Frank Rich sniffs out the gays in the anti-gay Conservative ranks from his comfortable perch at #3 on MEL, which we know New Yorkers will appreciate because how gay men smell and are smelled has ridden MEL hard all week.

Domestic Issues: Turbocharged Mommie brains have held on for over a week, clearly an even trade-off for stretch marks. Meanwhile, don't look now but somebody's fleecing Grandma (but she's still not allowed to dodder). But, at the end of the day, New Yorkers just want a reason to sing along to Tom Jones -- obviously we are a city of cat people because the Thursday Styles' piece on the popular wild (and wildly popular) Savannah -- part housecat, part wildcat -- has perched nimbly atop MEL 7 since then (obviously a bit more novel than brushing on some gratis bronzer at Sephora, which we've been doing for years).

What ever happened to class? The NYT's humdinger of a series on Class in America is still number one from Saturday even without any help from your fear of an incipient heart attack (or that your bone-crushing journey to the top was all for naught, thanks to this headline: "Life at the Top in America Isn't Just Better, It's Longer"). But whomever you might be, dear reader - well-heeled Radar tastemaker or one of the young and influential audience of Gawker media - rest assured that you will never be living as well as the pampered West Village pussycats of the Tom Jones article. Life sucks and then you die. Thanks, NYT!