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Dennis Rodman Finally Gets the Help He Needs…from a PR Firm

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2005 was a rough year for everyone.

See, here we thought Dennis Rodman had finally succeeded in becoming relevant again after spending many years in the “remember that guy?” wilderness where outrageous celebrities go to spend a few months in rehab and reflect upon lives of excess.

Today, however, we received a press release from New York firm The Pitching Staff announcing that its latest client would indeed be the former Bull.

We appreciate the honesty in the release, starting with the subject line “Dennis Rodman’s people ask PR firm to help”. We also like the bite-the-hand-that-feeds-you opener:

“In the aftermath of Dennis Rodman’s very public rant on CNN, Rodman has tapped Jules Feiler at The Pitching Staff for public relations council [sic].”

While the word “alcohol” doesn’t appear anywhere in the release, we like how the writer cuts right through the fat before listing the usual client history, etc.

Pitching Staff president Jules Feiler will be Rodman’s go-to guy. Feiler’s portfolio and NYU adjunct professorship are very impressive, but we find this quote from Prince Marketing Group founder/CEO Dennis Prince most interesting:

“…when it comes to Dennis, [Jules] is very sensitive and careful. Dennis trusts him implicitly, as do I.”

That’s a very specific choice of words. We also love Prince’s description of Rodman:

“…without a doubt the most interesting celebrity/athlete that will appear at any function or event. He will stop traffic and cause a commotion anywhere he goes which will ultimately result in promotion for you and your company.”

Spoiler: that may not always be true.

The apology tour has already begun, by the way: Rodman wants everyone to know that he’s not a traitor or an ambassador to North Korea, but he is both an alcoholic and a friend of one Kim Jong-Un. If only Chris Cuomo would visit North Korea, then he’d understand.

Now where do we go from here?

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