Sometimes a great idea alone is enough to capture the attention of an editor — even if the angle of the original pitch wasn’t necessarily the hook. Joan Trossman Bien sent a cold query to AARP The Magazine on an idea she had to profile a 64-year-old filmmaker. The result was an FOB piece in the October/November 2013 issue of the magazine that focused on an element of her pitch — a program that pairs returning military veterans with older farmers who prepare the vets to be farmers themselves. The pitch was an especially big score for the writer because not only was AARP the largest publication she had successfully pitched, it’s also a magazine that accepts only about 1 percent of new-writer submissions.
What the Writer Did
Joan Trossman Bien: Well, [my pitch] started out as a different idea. A friend of mine introduced me to Dulanie Ellis, a documentary filmmaker. My pitch was about second stage of her life, a profile. When I pitched [Margaret Guroff, features editor, at] AARP she said it’s not really for [my department], but it might be just the thing for one of our editors [David Dudley]. And what he was most interested in was the farm-to-vet program featured in [Ellis’] latest film. I had initially pitched this to More magazine because I know it does stories about people reinventing themselves. I got an immediate answer — they passed — but it was better than waiting [on the feedback]. I had really gotten tired of getting assignments that paid next to nothing. I have written about 225 articles, so I really needed to get into a higher level — those that paid $1 to $2 a word.
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The Pitch
| Subject: Query: profile film, farms and vets [1]
Ms. Guroff: I would like to write a profile for you about a woman who has truly found herself in the second act of her life and has made the many changes needed to accomplish her new passion. Social Justice Through Storytelling on Film: Got Cause? [2] There is a new trend developing among baby boomers [3] , brought about by a combination of circumstances and a belief that once you step aside, you lose your involvement in life. The majority do not intend to retire. Dulanie Ellis counts herself in that crowd. Dulanie, who is 64, could be the poster girl for finding her passion later in life and devoting herself to making the world a better place. In this case, Dulanie has become a documentary filmmaker with her own production company. Over the years, she has worked on documentaries for HBO and the Southern Poverty Law Center. She was part of the team that created the Academy Award nominated Mighty Times — The Legacy of Rosa Parks. Until her mid-forties, Dulanie had been a script supervisor for feature films. Although that skill is distantly related to documentaries, her job was technically demanding. At the age of 52, Dulanie took the leap and opened her own production company. As a filmmaker, Dulanie now has full creative control and is responsible for all aspects of a production. Social justice has become Dulanie’s passion and family farming as an industry has become her cause. Her current film, Ground Operations: Battlefields to Farmlands is about a new program to save small farms. About half of the current farmers plan to retire in the next ten years. But their own families are not interested in continuing to run the farm. Military vets have been coming home in great numbers but have not had many opportunities for really good jobs. They need the kind of work that can lead to a career, just like the rest of us. Many vets also still have a desire to help the country, a common reason for enlisting. The program that is the basis for the documentary pairs older farmers with vets. [4] The farmer acts as a mentor and teaches the vet all about farming and that particular farm. When the farmer retires, the farm passes to the vet. That way, family farms remain active with new farmers who are both skilled and enthusiastic. Keeping the farms working can also help to revitalize rural America. Dulanie has a compelling personal story. She was comfortable as a script supervisor for many years but, when she had her only child at age 43, she wanted to stay home. During that time, she moved to Ventura County where rolling hills of small farms formed a comforting landscape. Dulanie fell in love with the tamed rural open spaces that provided sustenance for so many people. Many of the farms are organic or raise specialty crops sold at the farmer’s markets. She had worried that these farms would disappear as she saw the county population grow and housing developments sprout up in what had once been tended fields. Making a documentary about this farming program melded her two loves. Dulanie has taken control of her life and lives it fully. The satisfaction is what she reaps at a time in life when most people are preparing to retire. Dulanie has weathered difficulties, such as losing 80% of her sight in one eye, yet has stayed focused on her life’s purpose. Why should I be the writer on this story? [5] As a freelance journalist and general assignment reporter, I have more than 225 published articles in the past five years. My background is in television newswriting, having written for most of the television stations in Los Angeles over the years. I also earned a law degree in 2004. Right now, I write long form features regularly for two alt weeklies, the Ventura County Reporter and Pasadena Weekly. Sprinkled in between assignments are other publications and websites for which I write occasional articles. So here are a few examples of my work [6] : This was a relatively short profile of a local environmentalist/educator/political organizer who has led an unusually intrepid life. It was the cover for Ventana Monthly, an upscale publication. http://www.ventanamonthly.com/article.php?id=316&IssueNum=29 This story was the cover for the VC Reporter. It was about the local politicians who were running for office, all of them being women. http://www.vcreporter.com/cms/story/detail/?id=9865 This article for Pacific Standard (formerly Miller-McCune) is not a profile but demonstrates my research and reporting abilities. It is about safety systems for trains, the history of train crashes caused by human error and the attitude of the major rail lines towards public safety. http://www.psmag.com/business-economics/rails-150-year-wait-for-safety-3433/ Dulanie is not actively preparing for retirement because she said she never wants to stop working. That attitude reflects the changing nature of growing old: Baby Boomers, by necessity or choice, intend to stick with their work for as long as possible. [7] If a profile of Dulanie Ellis interests you, I do look forward to hearing from you. Sincerely, Joan Trossman Bien |
Why the Editor Bit
David Dudley, features editor at AARP The Magazine: One of my colleagues forwarded [the pitch] to me because I edit the mag’s “Upfront” department. Obviously, good/great clips are very helpful, and for most stories pretty much mandatory. But the pieces in “Upfront” are so short — 250 words tops — that the idea itself is the biggest draw.
The bottom line here is that Joan’s idea had at least three or four big things going for it. It hit on an issue that we’d been wanting to write about (the fact that American farmers, as a population, are getting so old on average). It had a simple, easily understood premise that would make sense even in a short 200-word piece. It had a timely Veteran’s Day connection that allowed us to add a Web tease to AARP.org’s many resources for older veterans. And she named names and had what looked like a promising main character scoped out. It was just very easy to see how a piece on this nonprofit would slide perfectly into the October/November book.
What Happened Next
Joan Trossman Bien: I heard back on the pitch maybe a week later. I was surprised by the 200 words [and needing] two people to quote because I was used to long-form writing at much smaller publications. I was also not used to having that many people helping me with the fact checking, etc. It’s been a great experience. And my ego really needed it. AARP pays $2 a word, so I made more [on this piece] than on the assignments that were 2,500 words. I want to be with the big boys now. The advice I have is to write. Just write. If you don’t have an assignment, write anyway.
David Dudley: As I often do, I sent the first draft back for another round of reporting. Even though this was a short FOB piece [titled “Swords Into Plowshares”], it had two distinct characters and a good bit of explanation to get through, and we needed more details, livelier quotes, etc. We adjusted the original premise to better serve our audience, with more of a focus on the inter-generational angle and how the Farmer Veteran Coalition brings older farmers together with younger veterans. I think Joan was a little surprised by how much expense goes into even a modestly scaled AARP The Magazine piece; we sent a photographer out to shoot portraits of the main subject on his organic farm.
I’m certainly open to considering future pitches and working with Joan again; she definitely demonstrated the key skill of the freelancer — understanding exactly how your idea would fit the needs of the publication you’re pitching.
Key Components of the Pitch
[1] Never underestimate the importance of your email subject line. Joan’s, “Query: profile film, farms and vets,” is short and to the point yet intriguing. And the editor sees immediately that this is a query, which increases the likelihood that the message will be opened. Back to pitch
[2] In the second paragraph, Joan suggests a possible title for the story. Editors like writers who are one step ahead and offer ideas that can help round out the story. You are also giving the editor a better sense of what your story is really about. Back to pitch
[3] Joan is telling the editor right away why she should care about this pitch. It involves baby boomers, which is the core demographic of this publication. Back to pitch
[4] The description of the farm-to-vet program is approximately the point at which Joan sparked the interest of the editor she originally pitched. Had Joan not included such detail in her query (and only mentioned Dulanie Ellis in general terms), she may not have been given the FOB assignment. Back to pitch
[5] Near the end of the pitch, Joan details her writing experience, [6] complete with links to her work. She even briefly explains why she chose these particular examples. Back to pitch
[7] Joan concludes the pitch by circling back to why this story is appropriate for AARP‘s audience. Back to pitch
