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Archives: February 2006

Before They Were Star Party Promoters

In honor of the recent Angeleno / Los Angeles write-ups of Brent Bolthouse, a Los Angeles club promoter so hot (or is that hott?) he makes Apple and Audrey look like my Aunts Gertrude and Hester (respectively), we bring you the IMDB page for ‘Waxwork II: Lost in Time’, in which he played the role of Cabbie #2. Let this be a beacon of hope for struggling actors everywhere.

Dress Your Kids in Granola

zeta-jones2.jpgCasting call for a Catherine Zeta-Jones vehicle being shot today in Chelsea. Kids for the “background” (that’s “extras” to you and me), are told, via phone message, how to dress:

Warmly, because it’s winter. (Makes sense.)
No reds or whites or hip hop or logos. (Got it.)
Clothes also should be
    colorful (OK)
    flavorful (um, OK)
    artistic (still OK, I guess)
    new age (like crystals?)
    granola (missed that in the Spring collection)

mediabistro presents: Introduction to Writing Celebrity Profiles

Celebrities are the most important people in our society. Therefore, celebrity profiling is the highest form of journalism. Can’t argue with that logic!, the Jack-and-Ennis to this blog’s herd of sheep, is offering an introductory seminar on writing celebrity profiles Thursday night in West Hollywood. It’s taught by New York / Rolling Stone contributor Vanessa Grigoriadis, who’s profiled more celebrities than I’ve dented fenders. And that’s a lot.

This is an intermediate class, so you need to have at least a year of journalism experience or, say, three years of writing for Daily Candy. More info here.

LAT in 90 seconds

- Oh, come on. I mean who doesn’t keep a gun in their Ferrari in this town?

- Warren Buffet, cartoon character. Sounds more fun than watching Donald Trump.

- Joel Stein discovers that people dress up for the Oscars! And designers loan out their outfits. Who knew?

And the winner of the Johnnie Cochran Memorial Name-that-catchphrase as-it-applies to-the-DaVinci Code scandal Contest is!

…”If the plot is nicked, you must convict.”

Congratulations! You’ve won your very own Boxer-as-Mona Lisa lithograph (pictured in yesterday’s post).

You can claim it at the Louvre’s courtesy desk; simply ask for “Freres Jacques.”

There the New York Post Goes Again…

…slapping the EXCLUSIVE tag on anything which advances the story even an inch. Today’s “exclusive:” that Spin is about to be sold. This is old news — like, a month old — and the only bit that seems new is the sudden participation of Nion McEvoy (a member of the clan which once owned the San Francisco Chronicle) and the McEvoy Group alongside Hartle Media. That’s a nice little bit of scooping, to be sure. But the rest of it, ranging from the new editor, Andy Pemberton, and the new publisher, Malcolm Campbell, to the timing of the deal (which Mediaweek reported yesterday) is hardly new news. Hell, even Pemberton’s quotes sound recycled from a launching-of-Blender story from five years ago…

We’re taking bets…

Which one of these movies will get made first?

This one, about Santa Claus’ loser brother with the $20 million star, or this one, from the $20 million director with the highest grossing film of all time?

A nickel says Vince is in theaters in a fat suit come next Christmas.

LAT: A peek inside the Oscar security blanket

Gone are the heady days where one might throw on a tux, snort 5 or 6 grams of blow to take the edge off, and depart for the Oscars.

Now, apparently, everyone needs their woovie.

mySpace: the Movie

The AP today chronicles the outrageous fortune of David Lehre, a budding filmmaker who exhibits all the precocious insouciance of Scorsese and all the cinema verite of Von Trier: girl_throwing_up.gif

Lehre’s 11-minute short parodies the habits of the popular social networking site. It is told in five scenes, beginning with an underwear-clad teen who vainly takes pictures of himself in the bathroom until his mothers barges in. Another scene features a showdown between a boy and his girlfriend who demands his password to view incriminating photos on his page. The final scene shows a partygoer – an actor portraying MySpace’s co-founder Tom Anderson – vomiting while his friends capture it on camera.

Yes, friends: Be of good cheer. The future of cinema is safe, thanks to MTV, which has given him a first-look deal.

I think I need to hire an actor to portray me vomiting, too. Now wouldn’t that be meta?

You want Frey’s with that? Scandal-dogged DaVinci Code gets its day in court

We are always amazed when superstar authors wield the “Um, I dunno.” defense against plagiarism.

Take Dan Brown, who today had his day in court (in London) to fend off attacks from researchers who claim he pilfered their findings to create the multi-million copy best-seller soon to be rammed down every mammalian throat via Sony Pictures. bonalisa.jpg

Brown’s novel defense, via Reuters?

“Presiding judge Peter Smith pointed out that in the Internet age, it was difficult for researchers to know the provenance of the material they were reading. He also questioned exactly what the central theme of The Holy Blood, and the Holy Grail was…Jonathan James, representing the historians at London’s High Court, countered: “If you are researching, it is up to you to know what source you are looking at”.

Really? ‘I found it on the Internet, so it must be fair game?’ That’s the defense?

Meanwhile, this whole case is a textbook Inverted Frey: Wherein an author purposely publishes truthful research but claims it as his own.

Since Johnnie Cochran‘s demise, we’ve run out of things to rhyme with “you must acquit” and so we have no clever catch-phrase to apply here.

We look to you, the FishbowlLA reader, to supply one that’s both rhythmic and legally apropos of nothing. As a starter, we’ll offer you, “If Christ’s kids are illegit, you must acquit!

Bon chance!