We love novelty gifts, goddamnit. We also have a yen for anything related to political scandals that keep the news cycle going for months upon months. That's why finding out that Stupid.com was marketing a Talking Larry Craig Action Figure made our day.

The doll is 12" tall, wears an "I Am Not Gay" t-shirt (pictured), and is fully articulated so you can reenact airport bathroom shenanigans to your heart's content. Best of all, press a button and he reads from his press conference:

"Thank you all very much for coming out today. I will read a statement: 'I am not gay. I never have been gay."

If Spencer Gifts doesn't start selling this soon, we're gonna lose all our faith in humanity.