Troubled ex-New York slugger Darryl Strawberry — whose battles with substance abuse and subsequent jail stints are rivaled only by those of ex-teammate Doc Gooden — is being auctioned off by Major League Baseball to kids as a visitor and speaker to tri-state area schools.

This auction features the opportunity to have Darryl Strawberry come to YOUR school! The winning bidder of this auction will have the chance to have New York Legend Darryl Strawberry attend your school for a special appearance for up to an hour. Strawberry will also give a short speech to your school on valubable life lessons. Don't miss out on this rare opportunity to have a super star like Daryl Strawberry [sic] come to YOUR school!

Not surprisingly, the auction — currently at $250 — has seen just two bids.