Coming up with new and interesting sex-related story pitches isn’t easy. More often than not, writers will find themselves in Carrie Bradshaw’s Manolos, racking their brains to squeeze out a fresh take on the subject.
If you’re a writer hoping to have some success in pitching sex-related content to an editor, gird your loins, because you’ll need cover your bases. It has to strike the right tone. It has to be novel and insightful. It has to offer a strong point-of-view. And at the very least, it has to be an entertaining read. We tapped sex writers and editors to find out what it takes to make sex (articles) sell.
S*x: Get Past the Spam Filter
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First things first, you have to get your pitch past the editor’s hockey goal of an email spam filter. If you are approaching an editor for the first time, writing team Em & Lo, who specialize in sex and love-related topics, suggest trying to keep the email’s headline “as PG as possible” since you don’t know what might trigger the editor’s spam filter. “Sometimes we’ve even had to write “s*x” to get something through,” say the prolific duo, who have written for the likes of Glamour, Details, New York, Cosmo, Marie Claire, and Men’s Journal, and have co-authored six books including Sex: How to Do Everything and Rec Sex: An A-Z Guide to Hooking Up.
More practically speaking, “I like my subject lines to include the word ‘pitch’ so I know what it is,” says Sarah Harrison, YourTango.com senior editor, “and including a hed in the style of those used on our site always get my attention. That means it’s straightforward instead of clever word-play, it includes the angle of the piece, and it’s something a reader would click on.”
Take Risks Without Being Too Racy
As Helen Gurley-Brown once said, “At Cosmo, all those years, people thought we were successful because of the sex [or] we were successful because we were so outrageous, but really, the writing is what did it — very clear, very specific, very literate. It was never boring.”
James Bassil, editor-in-chief of men’s lifestyle website AskMen.com, says, “I think a lot of writers make the mistake in thinking that the salaciousness of the topic is its selling point, when clearly we all know that by its very nature, a lot of sex content is going to be a little racy.”
“And if anything for us, we want to tone that down because we want it to be more practical and more accessible for our [readers]. We want it to be content that every guy will feel comfortable approaching and will be able to digest without feeling self-conscious about it. So in that sense, I would say stay away from the raciness,” Bassil adds.
“Don’t confuse erotica with sex writing,” advise Em & Lo. “Yes, you’re covering a topic that may deal with salacious issues, but you rarely want your writing to be titillating,” — unless, of course, you’re pitching Penthouse.
Stephanie Auteri, assistant editor at YourTango.com and a freelance writer, says dialing back on the level of salaciousness or explicitness goes beyond editorial considerations. “As frustrating as it can be for sex writers and editors working with sex content, most publications have to be careful about what they run because they risk scaring off advertisers,” she says.
| “The key is not necessarily coming up with a new erogenous zone or position or technique — good luck with that! — but just finding a new way to package [or] present the material so it makes sense to people in a way it never has before.” |
Do Your Research
Before you waste your time and the editor’s, it’s always a good idea to check the website’s or magazine’s archives to be sure your story hasn’t already been covered. Stories that have been written about “a trillion times before” are the “type of evergreen content that can be easily churned out in-house,” Auteri says.
For story idea sources, “the latest scientific and academic research on sexual topics is always a good place to start,” say Em & Lo. “We have a few student interns each semester who help us keep on top of sex news, trends, and research, from pop culture to literature to science. But there’s no reason why a writer can’t do that research on their own — we just need a high volume of research because we have two daily blogs,” (EMandLO.com and “Naked Love“).
They also suggest finding stories using good ol’ reliable news.google.com and experimenting with different key word searches like “sex research,” “dating study,” and so on. “We also like scholar.google.com for finding original research — though you have to search hard there to find complete papers for free,” they say, because the site often charges for the full study beyond the abstract. They also read several U.K. newspapers online, such as the Guardian and the Telegraph. “They seem to cover a lot more sex research stories than the U.S. papers. In addition, we’ve made a lot of contacts over the years at various conferences and by interviewing various experts for articles, so we always encourage those people to get in touch when they have news to share,” Em & Lo say.
Same Sex, New Package
The most difficult part of successfully pitching a sex story is “trying to come up with something new and fresh to say about sex, or at least coming up with a new way to say it,” say Em & Lo. “That’s what everyone wants — even the women’s magazines that seem to run the same articles about sex just with different titles,” they say.
“The key is not necessarily coming up with a new erogenous zone or position or technique — good luck with that! — but just finding a new way to package [or] present the material so it makes sense to people in a way it never has before. For example, we recently wrote a piece on male and female sexual anatomy, and there wasn’t really any new information in there about anatomy itself — it was more the way we made comparisons between the various man and lady parts. It helped readers think about anatomy in a different way,” Em & Lo say.
Auteri, who’s also written for Time Out New York, Playgirl, TheFrisky.com, and Nerve.com, says, “When putting together your pitch, ask yourself, ‘Is this especially relevant now [and/or] does it have a news hook? Am I approaching it in a new and intriguing way? Can I think of a new and creative way to package it? As far as what will give you that extra edge, I’ve been told that my writing has impressed because of how honest it is… how open I’m willing to be,” says Auteri.
Getting Personal
You can always draw on your own relationships for story ideas, something that’s not for the faint of heart, and something Em & Lo say they “very, very rarely” do. For most publications, “there’s a firm line between reported articles and personal essays. So don’t assume you’ll have to write about your own sex life if you want sex to be your beat,” the duo say. But it certainly helps readers relate if you do decide to share details about your life.
“If you’re unwilling to be open about your personal experiences, an editor is going to wonder why she shouldn’t just assign the story to someone else… someone who is willing,” says Auteri. “In fact, before hiring me to write my Sex With Stephcolumn, my editor at The Frisky specifically asked if I would be willing to weave in my own personal experiences. My response? ‘Don’t you know I’m the queen of TMI?'”
| “If you’re unwilling to be open about your personal experiences, an editor is going to wonder why she shouldn’t just assign the story to someone else… someone who is willing.” |
“That personal touch allows for relatability, helping the reader to feel more comfortable engaging in a dialogue around the topic. And in the realm of Web content, especially, we want that reader interaction. That openness and honesty also make for a more trustworthy narrator,” Auteri says. For example, when Auteri wrote “How To Get Pregnant When Your Sex Life Is Sub-Par” for YourTango.com, she boldly injected her own revealing personal experiences into the story. “I received a slew of comments thanking me for my honesty, and for providing a forum where people could discuss such a difficult topic,” she says.
Have A Sense of Humor
Humor can be a welcome relief and can also put readers at ease when it comes to sexual content, but it’s a “balancing act,” say Auteri. “You should have fun with the content you’re producing without being flippant. You should be upbeat. You should be able to shine a spotlight on your most cringe-worthy moments, laugh at them, and then learn from them,” she adds.
Corny double entendres, however, should be avoided “at all costs — there are far more intelligent ways to write about sex with humor,” say Em & Lo. The “wink-wink, nudge-nudge locker room humor” is also something you may want to reconsider, they add.
“We think the best approach is simply not to take sex too seriously — but the humor should be mature,” Em & Lo say. “Immature humor” will make the reader think you’re embarrassed to be talking about the subject — and “therefore they should be too,” they say, which is not the effect you want to have. “Also, we tend to tone down the humor in magazine pitches — that can come later, and is too often misconstrued in a simple pitch,” they say.
Auteri cites the piece she wrote for Lemondrop.com, “Feeling Out of Shape? We Try the Sexerciseball,” as a story where humor served her readers well. “Basically, show that you’re human,” she says. “You don’t need to be that porn-perfect sex kitten. Show your doubts, your neuroses, your flubs.”
NEXT >> How To Pitch: YourTango.com
Jennifer Pullinger is a freelance writer and book and film publicist in Richmond, Va. Visit her at www.JenniferLPullinger.com.
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