The LA Times looked hither and yon to find someone, anyone who could write a strong op-ed letter to Lindsay Lohan about the hardships and joys of getting clean and sober. Someone who could relate to the pressures of fame. Someone who understand being 20, rich, sought-after, and minutely scrutinized.

Who'd they turn to?

Eric Lucas, garlic farmer. But not just any garlic farmer--one who woke up naked on his front lawn and scared the milkman. A middle-aged garlic farmer who's been in recovery for 23 years and lives in Seattle and writes guidebooks. To be fair, his work has turned up in the paper before--in the travel section.

Anna David would have been a much, much better choice. She wrote her novel, Party Girl, after 5 years in recovery and has the consummate insider's view of the pressures of constant media attention--she's written for People, Premiere, Playboy--all the P magazines.

Of course, a young, hot female journalist who covers the red carpet world while being in recovery herself doesn't have the same mass appeal that a Washington State garlic farmer can command.

But FBLA bets that Miss Lohan is not going to get his message.