Underlying rights

The new Law and Order episode on Friday (the night series go to die) depicted a late abortion doctor being gunned down in church. Sound familiar? Only the episode had some pretty egregious implications about the murdered Dr. George Tiller and the nature of what he did. The "fictitious" character Dr. Benning, is not only an abortion doctor but a straight up baby stabber:
Kate Harding at Salon puts it best:

Dr. Benning once (or was it only once?) botched a late-term abortion, causing the woman to go into labor and deliver a live baby. So, as any good abortion provider would, he asked the accidental mother if he should "finish the job" and then stabbed the live baby in the head with a pair of scissors. We learn this from the nurse who attended the homicide, then subsequently left the clinic and went to work in a neo-natal unit at a hospital, symbolically converted to the pro-life cause. No one representing the New York criminal justice system ever thinks to ask this nurse why she didn't, you know, report the murder she witnessed. The important thing, obviously, is that the experience changed her heart. (Also, may we remind you that this story is fiction, any resemblance, blah blah blah? Because this is totally not meant to viciously assault the memory of Dr. Tiller or confirm anti-choicers' deranged fantasies about him or anything. The disclaimer was right there, people!)

Read the whole piece here.

Comedian Robin Reiser (cousin to Paul Reiser) witnessed a violent episode of road rage where a man beat another man bloody in front of tons of witnesses on 3rd Street near Sweetzer. Robin called 911 and gave her contact info to authorities. So of course she was asked to testify in court against the alleged assailant.

The trial was today. Robin showed up and ADA Christine Kee told her the defense attorney Robert Swartz was going to use footage of Robin falling in front of a police car. This was a series of YouTube videos where Robin and company fell in public places and often times weird things happened like Elvis helping them up (see video above). Because people falling is always funny.

Anyway they showed the above clip (among others) for the jury. A couple jurors laughed. "I was afraid they were going to start showing my stand up, that I couldn't handle," Reiser tells FBLA.

So here's the moral of the story: if you're funny no one will ever ever take you seriously.

"I think a couple of those jurors will go and Google me when they get home. I bet I got some new fans," riffs Reiser.

It reminds us of a quote from the late Bob Monkhouse,"When I said I was going to become a comedian, they all laughed. Well, they're not laughing now."

Here's a link to Robin's site.

If you still have an office job, you're likely picking up the slack from all the people that got laid off and more overworked than ever. And if you're childless, you're especially likely to be saddled with overtime and extra assignments. All while seeing your benefits slashed and your cute secretary fired. Nuts to that.

The Office Kid^TM is a fake child in a kit. You get a framed photo, some crappy artwork, and an unlimited source of excuses to leave work early. We're ordering three, and they're all going to be having medical emergencies next week. Need to catch up on our drinking.

Found via Neatorama

Advocacy group AIDS Healthcare Foundation has filed workplace health and safety complaints with Cal-OSHA (California's Division of Occupational Safety and Health) against 16 adult entertainment companies. They contend that making porn without condoms amounts to unsafe working conditions for performers. And they're right. From the LA Times:

The complaints will mark the latest move by the Los Angeles-based advocacy group to pressure the porn industry and government regulators to do more to safeguard the health of adult-film performers.

The foundation sued Los Angeles County last month alleging that public health officials had failed to prevent the spread of sexually transmitted diseases and to enforce laws requiring employers to protect workers against exposure to bodily fluids. The suit was filed after the disclosure that an adult-film performer had tested positive for HIV.

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Advocacy Group Decries PETA's Inhumane Treatment Of Women

Our sister blog FishbowlNY has the details:

The board of directors of the Associated Press has instructed the news wire to develop a registry that will tag and track all AP content online in order to make sure it's not being plagiarized or misused.

"The system will register key identifying information about each piece of content that AP distributes as well as the terms of use of that content, and employ a built-in beacon to notify AP about how the content is used," the AP said.

"What we are building here is a way for good journalism to survive and thrive," Dean Singleton, chairman of the AP Board of Directors, said in a statement. "The AP news registry will allow our industry to protect its content online, and will assure that we can continue to provide original, independent and authoritative journalism at a time when the world needs it more than ever."

Although the system will originally only affect the AP's text content, it will eventually extend to member content early next year and to photos and videos after that.

Will.i.am's manager punched gossip toady Perez Hilton after Hilton called him names that made GLAAD pissed.

We here at FBLA haven't covered it. Mainly because we care so little about Hilton and his wailing saccharin drama. Both of us have tried to prod the other into caring/posting about this incident. Alas, we've yet to.

Until today. Today, we got an email, we've posted the whole stupid thing after the break but here is an excerpt:

"Freedom of speech should never be compromised" "Wether (sic) you love Perez or hate Perez he is a entertainment icon that has the right to free speech"

There are two documents oft quoted and rarely understood. One is the Bible, the other is the US Constitution. The First Amendment refers to Congress not abridging freedom of speech. Congress. Congress. Not Will.i.am's hired muscle. Not people who disagree with you (yeah we're talking to you Carrie Prejean). Congress. Perez Hilton's free speech was not interfered with. He has a big mouth and someone hit him in it. That's assault. It's in no way related to the Freedom of Speech.

Telling someone to shut up is not violating their rights (ahem Sarah Palin). The government making you shut up is. The government. Not the press. Not your neighbor. Not a blogger. Congress. The government.

Hilton is not a martyr for Free Speech. He's a nasty, shallow, catty gossip who has always enjoyed freedom of expression.

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Uhm. Wow. This is really a case for not procrastinating.

LAT piece here.

President of American Apparel, Dov Charney sent us this letter about the lawsuit by Woody Allen that was settled today.

Here's a good rule: if you have to explain it to Woody Allen - it's not funny. Here's another: the First Amendment is the government not infringing on your expression, not Woody Allen not infringing on your expression of his image with your logo.

Plus, Charney gets into a bit of revisionist history and claims there is this whole conspiracy making people believe he's a huge pervert. This coming from a guy that started masturbating in front of a reporter from Jane. He used to flaunt it, now he's the victim of bad press and misunderstandings. Uh huh.

Whole letter is printed below:

Today the lawsuit filed against American Apparel by Woody Allen will settle whereby he will receive a 5 million dollar payment. The vast majority of this payment will be paid by our insurance carrier who is responsible for the decision to settle this case and has controlled the defense of this case since its inception. Naturally there is some relief of not having to go through a trial but I also harbor a sense of remorse and sadness for not arguing an important issue regarding the First Amendment, particularly the ability of an individual or corporation to invoke the likeness of a public figure in a satiric and social statement.

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