Quotes of the Day – Home for the Holidays Edition

“Merry Christmas from Ft. Lauderdale” — Syndicated columnist and Bullfight Strategies’ Karl Frisch.

Digital journo overextends herself

“2011: The year I decided to do all my shopping, and cook a meal for six people, on Christmas Eve. (Obvious postscript: I’M AN IDIOT.)” — Kiplinger‘s Caitlin Dewey.

Writer misses old holiday escape

“I miss going to Tower Records on Xmas Day to hang with the other losers escaping their families.” — Reuters‘ Jack Shafer.

TV reporter attracts staring babies

“Lately babies staring at me. Neighbor’s kid did thru dinner. Today, another baby STARING. Asked mother why? She said ‘YOUR TEETH’… huh?” — ABC7′s Stephen Tschida.

WaPo‘s Karen Tumulty: “Christmas cookies for breakfast. Again.”

NO MORE FATTY TENDERLOIN!

“After yrs of war finally convinced mom not to cut fat off the beef tenderloin. Had to explain @noreservations would murder her in the face.” — Roll Call‘s John Stanton.

A Christmas miracle…

“I dropped my wallet at Costco and an unknown Good Samaritan turned it in – nothing missing. It’s a Christmas miracle!” — TWT‘s Emily Miller.

Uh oh.

“Elks are At the point of the night where we are threatening to beat each other up – booze.” — Labor Journo Mike Elk. Earlier, he wrote, “I’m drunk and can’t figure out how to watch any of the TV’s in my parents’ house – I just wanna see a Christmas story.”

Please, shhh….

“Cabbie knew a lot about the etymology of my last name. #tooearly” — LAT‘s James Oliphant.

Journo gets gipped on fortune

“Shocked by the fortune cookie we got post Jewish Xmas.” — HuffPost‘s Sam Stein.

Taxi Co. ruins church trip

“Alas, @BarwoodTaxi fails us this morning. Daughter can’t go to church…. (Thinking of updating The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.)” — WaPo‘s Book World Editor Ron Charles.

‘Merry Methmas‘

“News from Florida: Cousin’s cousin died of a crystal overdose on Friday. #rip #merrymethmas.” — Reason Assoc. Editor Mike Riggs. In a later tweet, he added, “Merry Shitfaced.”

Also shitfaced…

“Santa? Did you leave me all of these empty liquor bottle and this terrible headache?” — National Review Online‘s Jonah Goldberg.

Maybe wishes she was shitfaced?

“Not saying I’ve haven’t found my hubby a good Xmas present, but about to walk around looking for something shiny from a street vendor. #fail” — USA TODAY Washington Bureau Chief Susan Page.

What’s really important…

“Merry Christmas friends! Remember that this day is about two things: CHRIST & spiked eggnog. Reflect on and enjoy both!” — Human Events‘ Jason Mattera.

Don’t hate me because I’m covering Obama’s Hawaiian Xmas

“Good morning from Honolulu. Keep the “tough duty” comments. Heard em all during 8 yrs of Santa Barbara w/ Pres Reagan.” — CBS Radio White House Correspondent Mark Knoller.

Note to God: Your kids are annoying

“Making my list for the dreaded Christmas Eve grocery store trip. Lord grant me the patience to deal with all your irritating children today.” — Co-Founder of GOProud Jimmy LaSalvia.

Convo Between Two Journos

Roll Call‘s Stanton: “Whatever my dogs ate it has come back with an olfactory vengeance.”

TPM‘s Brian Beutler: “Your underwear.”

“7 y.o. daughter reading farm book: “What does castration mean?” the age old Christmas day question.” — CBS Political Director John Dickerson.

Unnecessary Tweet of the Day

“Decorating the tree is my favorite part of #christmas! Do you prefer white or colored lights?” — Katie Couric.