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Is Your Mom On Twitter? No, But That’s A Good Thing, Right?

It’s Mother’s Day in the USA this Sunday, and over on the official blog, Twitter has put together a post offering advice and tips on how everybody can get their mothers on to the network.

And they’ve even made a video, which features a funny clip involving Conan O’Brien and Twitter’s Biz Stone.

That aside, it’s pretty awful stuff. And it begs the question: do you actually want your mom on Twitter?

Of course, ‘my mom is on Facebook’ has been a long-running meme and a cause of concern for many for quite a few years now. A study last year showed that 48% of Facebook-using parents are friends with their kids. Which means, of course, that over half are not. Be interesting to know if that same half actually sent friend requests.

Ouch.

And of course, that’s the problem. Being active on social media means you’re always on camera, but that doesn’t mean you want your mother watching, too. It’s also a bit of a role-reversal – essentially, you’re letting her into your social womb. And if that use of language doesn’t put you off, there are all sorts of things to consider. Do you let her see everything? Do you file her away in a specially-created, super-secure group? Or do you deny ever receiving the friend request and tell her ‘Facebook has been broken for months’?

Of course, Twitter isn’t Facebook. It’s a public network and there’s less chance of your folks stumbling across scenes of you doing regrettable things in photos that have been tagged by your friends (which, of course, they’ll be doing constantly once they know your mom is on Facebook). But there is still a risk of fall-out – do you really want to have to watch your tweets?

Still, if you’re desperate to get your mother involved, Twitter has this advice.

When you’re hanging with your mom this Mother’s Day, try teaching her a thing or two about Twitter. Moms on Twitter are like moms in real life: fun, funny, caring, adorable and engaging. It’ll bring you closer and provide some laughs as well.

There’s even a play-by-play crib sheet of sorts in case your mum doesn’t take the bait.

She says, “But, I don’t have anything to say.”

You say, “Ok, but I know you don’t like it when I don’t call you back. Sometimes I get busy and if you’re curious what I’m up to, Twitter is an easy way to find out. You can get a lot out of Twitter without ever tweeting. Once you get comfortable with it, you can reply to me and I’ll see it just like I’d see a message from a friend.”

She says, “I don’t care about celebrities.”

You say, “But you care about me!”

Ugh. Man, that’s awful. Really, really awful. When did Marcia Brady get on Twitter?

And if you think that’s nauseating, check out the video.

I hate these people.

The Conan clip aside, here’s my problem with this:

  1. It’s stomach-churningly sickly sweet, like pouring maple syrup on a Twinkie, then dipping it in sugar before each bite. Who are these awful people?
  2. It only features people from the USA. Again. Isn’t Twitter a global success story?
  3. There’s a section where a mother and her daughter talk about how Twitter makes them feel so connected by discussing it over Facetime. Yep, Twitter makes you feel so connected that you need to use a video call to discuss how connected you feel.

Moms might well be ‘fun, funny, caring, adorable and engaging’, but they’re also over-protective, easily hurt, liable to embarrass you and prone to over-analyse. That’s what being a mother is all about. It’s not all gravy. Sure, you owe her and stuff, but does that mean you have to do everything together? Really? Why can’t we just live? Why can’t we just be?

Seriously, I have no issues whatsoever with moms on Twitter. Your moms. Bring ‘em on. The more the merrier. Looking good. Those salsa classes have really paid off.

My mother? Sure, why not. Good times. Welcome aboard. No problem.

After all, the block is just one click away. And Twitter has been broken for months.

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