Matthew Fiedler is probably a nice young guy. I'm sure he worked hard to get through college so he could become the world's next Bogusky, or whoever the kids are idolizing these days. He sent me this music video, it's yet another in a long list of YouTube junk coming from ad-kin with way too much time on their hands because America got high and forgot it was boiling water for an early evening Velveeta Shells & Cheese snack. And now there's nowhere for Fiedler to work.

Like I said, dude wrote to me, "I've created a viral music video to try and get myself a job at an ad agency. I want to share it with more people, and I thought it would be great on the agency spy blog. If you like it, please post it, and feel free to comment on my attempt, or rip it, or whatever."

It's gotten so bad out there that this kid thought he had a better chance of getting a job by sending us his stuff than he did by actually going to an agency. I presume he's done that with his book, btw, so please Matt don't make me look like a dick. As for ripping on your video, or whatever, sit back.

You have a lot of instruments there, Mr. Creativity. Start a band, start smoking, and play for beers at local pubs. You're only young once and this business will shit all over you. Have some fun before the poop rains like whoa.

Write a second song and make it into a video entitled, "Dear Advertising: my balls, your face while you sleep" The first line, "I'm a little sweaty, a little sad, but when I put my balls on advertising's face, I don't feel so bad. (doo wap doo waa, and so forth)." This is probably a terrible idea for a song.

You'll always do better in life as a rebel than you will begging. Do it (whatever that means) and ask forgiveness later. Never do anything that has kind-of been done before, as much as that is possible. Call Lee Clow (if you don't know who that is, no biggie) and tell him he looks like a cross between a Raisinette, a bagel and that flying dog from "A Never-ending Story". And Carol Burnette. Then tell him you're the solution to his agency's problems and follow up with an email linking to your work. That definitely won't work, but it'll give him something to laugh about, and that's more important that anything else.

And to you, faithful readers: please don't be total assholes in the comments. Let's see what kind of productive advice you can come up with. Seriously.

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