2006: A Media New Year

David S. Hirschman, our colleague over at the MediaBistro Mother Ship, collects media predictions from various critics, commentators, and industry reporters.

The list is both funny and insightful and is worth a read in full.

Some of the funnier ones:

DYLAN STABLEFORD, FOLIO: Jay-Z will buy reeling hip-hop magazine The Source, and thusly inherit his 100th problem.

JON FRIEDMAN, MARKETWATCH.COM: Mitch Albom won’t write his Final Four column this time until AFTER the end of the tournament.

DAVID HAUSLAIB, JOSSIP: Lloyd Grove’s contract will expire. For real this time.

BILL POWERS, NATIONAL JOURNAL: In 2006, newspapers will finally get their act together and become exciting, modern, user-friendly tools for life. A newspaper rolled up under the arm will be more hip and fashionable than dangling white earbuds. In an unrelated development, scientists will announce the birth of a pig with tiny, fully functional wings.

MARK JURKOWITZ, BOSTON PHOENIX: In a stunning Vanity Fair article, “Deep Throat”–aka W. Mark Felt–reveals that he was the Bush administration source who discussed Valerie Plame with The Washington Post’s Bob Woodward.

ADAM PENENBERG, SLATE.COM/NEW YORK UNIVERSITY: Desperate to keep pace with Fox News, CNN will replace Anderson Cooper with supermodel Gisele Bundchen when viewers get tired of his earnestness and pine for some good ol’ T&A.

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