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A Recap of the Allbritton Garden Brunch (That We Weren’t Invited To.)

In the aftermath of the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, many revelers sought comfort in brunch yesterday morning to help heal the wounds from the night before. We have already reported on the institution that is the Thomson Reuters/McLaughlin annual brunch. Meanwhile, a relative newcomer to the WHCD brunch crowd, the Allbritton Garden Brunch, was taking place at the Georgetown home of Politico publisher, Robert Allbritton. We’d really LOVE to bring you a recap of that event. But, we weren’t invited. While it’s not necessarily a stinging snub as not even all of their own reporters get to go and they make it a point to have it covered (if you can even call it coverage) by their own reporter, insult was added to injury when Politico had the balls to send us a press release with pictures and a rundown of the event. Gee, how thoughtful of them. Here is how they helpfully described the event.

“For the third consecutive year, POLITICO Publisher Robert Allbritton and his wife, Dr. Elena Allbritton, opened the doors of their Georgetown home on the Sunday following the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner for an exclusive, invitation-only brunch. Roughly 250 were in attendence enjoying a menu of baby Colorado lamp chops, kobe beef hashcake with poached egg, heirloom apple and endive salad, Hong Kong steamed salmon, greek yogurt parfaits and a raw bar.”

That kobe beef hashcake sure sounds mouthwatering. So does the Hong Kong steamed salmon they must have had flown in fresh for the morning. But since we weren’t invited, we can only bring you what WE THINK went down at this exclusive garden brunch.

  • Charlie Mahtesian frantically scribbling the “5 Lessons From the Allbritton Garden Brunch.”
  • Politico‘s newest hire, Ryan Kearney, trying to convince everyone that he’s not nearly as creepy as he seems and that his work has vastly improved since Allbritton’s essentially failed venture TBD.
  • FNC’s Bret Baier having to convince everyone that he wasn’t a villainous coke dealer from a Miami Vice episode wearing the outfit pictured above. We dig the low-cut look on his peach button-down.
  • Bret Baier’s wife (also pictured above) turning down autograph seekers thinking she was Kim Kardashian or Cher.
  • Mike Allen staring into his Blackberry with the intensity of a thousand fiery suns.
  • BuzzFeed‘s Ben Smith, in town for the weekend, snapping pictures using Japanese Instagram.

So, while we weren’t actually there to bring you a full report, we have a feeling this was pretty close to reality.

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