In case you thought American politics were the world’s weirdest, this week the Israeli press has been obsessed with a PR scandal concerning the most asinine subjects: ice cream and makeup. Seems that Prime Minister Benjamin “Bibi” Netanyahu, best known for looking angry in public, somehow found a way to spend $13,000 a year on clothing, $9,000 on makeup and $2,700 to secure a “state-financed contract” for a steady supply of vanilla and pistachio ice cream!

This simple story quickly turned into a big “misuse of public funds” conundrum; Netanyahu responded by “freezing” his ice cream budget and inspiring headline writers everywhere to break out their lamest puns.

As usual, America still wins: Representative Jesse Jackson Jr. just pled guilty to charges of illegally spending nearly $1 million in campaign funds on elk heads, fur capes, Michael Jackson’s fedora and $10,000 worth of “Bruce Lee memorabilia”. The fact that it wasn’t taxpayers’ money doesn’t make it any less ridiculous. USA! USA! USA!

Oh, and a final note to Netanyahu: try the cookie dough. Seriously.