Is this thing on? That was a *taps mic* joke. It wasn’t funny, but since no one is here to not laugh at it, it doesn’t matter. What does matter is that this is the last year of life on earth. That means that at the ripe old age of 236 years (someone fact check that), the USA has passed its last Independence Day. No, Bill Pullman, July 4th will not soon become the world’s Independence Day. So, to stave off your newfound depression caused by the knowledge that the earth is going to die in December, here’s some distracting semi-ad related videos. Of the week.

5.  The BBC used to be primarily used as a wartime alternative to warm milk, lulling young children to sleep as bombed dropped all around their grimy bunkers. Today it’s a rock-n-roll organization known the world over for their coverage of stuff, including Formula 1. So here’s a quick clip that pays homage to the life of an F1 racer, replete with chest signatures and puking. It is reminiscent of other work, but can you tell which?

4. Joseph Gordon-Levitt stole our hearts when he played a lovable idiot teen alien on 3rd Rock From the Sun, but if we’re to take anything away from this trailer for Looper (his latest) it’s that in the future he will be exactly like Bruce Willis. Watch the trailer for this time-traveling-assassin story and you will find yourself – if nothing else – with glazed over eyeballs.

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Though nearly 50-years-old and aware that most moviegoers consider him to be insane, Tom Cruise will never miss an opportunity to star in yet another Mission: Impossible film, the fourth in a movie series that’s become for Cruise the equivalent of Die Hard for Bruce Willis. And, because all new Mission: Impossible movies feel like they have to outdo the previous installment in the “high-flying action” department, we see Cruise bungee jumping off of Dubai’s Burj Khalifa, the world’s tallest building. How did Cruise muster the courage to do stunts this extreme? Chalk it up to a whole lot of Scientology mixed with a dash of Coke Zero.

As Mission Impossible – Ghost Protocol‘s December 21 release date nears, we’re sure to see quite a bit of this cross-promotional campaign with Coke Zero, the official beverage of rogue government spies who play by their own rules. Aside from the above spot, which will run on globally TV and in cinemas, the campaign features a website visitors can unlock hidden content by completing a series of “missions.” The same interactive content will also be available through social gaming platform SCVNGR on iPhone and Android. So, who’s ready to eat their popcorn out of Mission: Impossible and Coke Zero branded bags for the next few months?

Credits-wise, the spot was co-produced by Paramount & Coke Zero in-house, and the print/packaging/digital graphics (as well as the CokeZero.com/Mission microsite) were all designed by Iconologic out of Atlanta.

As the saying goes, “A random twist does not a cohesive plot make.” If motion picture director M. Night Shyamalan had paid any attention during his time attending NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts, he might have realized this.

Okay, finding out Bruce Willis‘ character in The Sixth Sense was kind of cool. But, having every single one of your movies end with a dumb, forced twist is just lazy writing. Sick of Night and his crappy movies, a band of anonymous creatives (Publicis Modem SF copywriter Eric Roller, probably Ogilvy NY art director Vanessa Castaneda and maybe SF resident and Wired editor BBDO NY copywriter  Chris Baker)  have launched the “M. Night School,” with the sole purpose of receiving enough donations to send Mr. Shyamalan back to film school with the hope that he stops sucking so bad. When enough money is raised, the site’s creators will then present a giant check to Shyamalan (filming the whole thing). If the director refuses the money, the donations will then be used to send a lucky budding filmmaker to NYU in his stead.

A small film festival will be held to determine the winner should Shyamalan refuse. A reminder to all of the haters out there: the only Shyamalan-directed film since 1998 to lose money was Lady in the Water, with his most poorly rated film, 2010′s The Last Airbender, grossing $319 million on a $150 million budget. Maybe we should just scold the general public for their horrible taste?

After weeks of teasing with Twitter/online components and pretty over-the-top TV spots, Wieden + Kennedy finally pulled back the curtain over the weekend on its full “Black Mamba” film, which promotes Kobe Bryant‘s new Nike Zoom Kobe VI shoe.

Clocking in at nearly six minutes, the Robert Rodriguez-directed flick features all the players from the teaser spots including Bruce Willis, Danny Trejo, Kayne West, and Kobe (of course). The short film basically consists of a pitch meeting between Rodriguez and Bryant, with the two going back-and-forth with ideas on characters, etc. Kobe needn’t stretch himself much acting-wise (and he doesn’t) as the supporting cast carries the weight and the Zoom Kobe’s take center stage throughout. It’s about as silly as you’d expect, but a decent enough diversion from the work day.

It looks like Kobe Bryant‘s getting the all-star treatment when it comes to hyping his Nike Zoom Kobe VI shoe. Now that R/GA’s supplied the Twitter-based component for the Black Mamba campaign, W+K is rolling out teasers for a “Black Mamba” film, directed by Robert Rodriguez (who also plays sound designer here),  that’s set to debut in the U.S. and China during NBA All-Star weekend in February.

The Rodriguez imprint is all over the teasers, which seem inspired by the filmmaker’s recent flick, Machete, what with the overdramatic VO, action, explosions and fonts.  Hell, they even star Machete himself, Danny Trejo, along with Bruce Willis and Kanye West for some reason. While we draw comparisons to Dwyane Wade’s nightmarish Nike spot from early last year, check out the initial Mamba trailer, credits and rather awesome promo poster after the jump.

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They don’t call Kobe Bryant “The Black Mamba” for nothing. His ability to transform into a deadly force and strike without warning on the basketball court earned him the right to assume such a normally ridiculous nickname. Kobe’s “Mamba Moments” have never been extended beyond the game, though, until now.

Nike Basketball and R/GA have teamed up to emulate his transformation digitally through a website experience that changes the superstar from Kobe to Mamba through tweets. As Kobe’s tweets accumulate, the dark serpent inside him gradually grows until the beast is unleashed (kind of like Bill Bixby turning into Lou Ferrigno, we guess).

When the site reaches “Mamba” state, which is dependent upon a Twitter integration/algorithm that monitors the social conversations and automates the metamorphosis, users will have six-hour access to exclusive Kobe content and be eligible to win limited edition Kobe VI sneakers.

Just for kicks, check out a “Black Mamba” ad starring Kobe, Bruce Willis and Machete (talk about random) after the jump.

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